Underminded and Devalued Nurse

LegacyUser

I'm so frustrated with no one to turn to so I decided to post on here. I don't know why really..

I'm a nurse and just started on a new ward in a hospital in the country side. The hospital is really old and some of the staff have been there over 30 years including care assistants.

My problem is that one of the care assistants rules the roost on the ward. Shes been there over 13 years and is a good carer, and also has a good relationship with the nurse manager on the ward.

She and the nurse manager think I'm absolutely rubbish and incompetent and they completely undermine everything I do and its crushing my spirit big time!!!

She dictates what happens on the ward and lets say ANYTHING to do with patient care-- this woman will look over my shoulder and pass comment saying how desperate and useless I am from a distance.

Simple things in patient care, moving and handling, feeding, this woman will be across the ward passing comment and trying to Micro manage everything.

I'm a relaxed young nurse and I'm not in the hospital long (two months) but the nurse manager will not address or approach anything with regards to my work on the ward.

I was warned by another nurse to watch my back before I started on this ward as she said that I shouldn't be afraid to stand up for myself. I didn't know what she meant at the time and didn't ask her to elaborate but now I do...

I've good experience in a variety of health care settings and I am a competent and professional nurse, but this micro-managing care assistant and nurse manager will not address anything DIRECTLY to me. There is no line of communication between me and them And I fear my reputation in this hospital will be damaged by there behind the back approach to patient care.

Its like my back is a against the wall in this ward and I have never worked in an environment that was so controlled and dictated by a carer. I feel the nurse manager actually is like her lap dog, and is in agreement that I am not a good nurse- but they will not address ANTYHING directly to me.

Its like if you have a problem with my work, speak to me directly and I'll try a different approach; but NOTHING.

I feel like the new kid in school who everyone thinks is a thicko or weirdo or something and I'm actually so stressed out about it.

I've actually cried myself to sleep because I feel so defenseless in this situation.

I've had to move away from home to take this job and I'm living on my own. To boot they've put me on christmas eve, christmas day so i'll miss my family. I just feel so alone... like if things don't get addressed properly I'll lose my temper and snap with these ppl on the job; and theres only one loser in that situation-- and its not going to be them...

Taltos

OP - this forum is more appropriate to your issue.

Can I remind all that follow this thread from PI that the Work Problems charter now applies. Please ensure you have read it before replying.

Thanks
Taltos

JuliusCaesar

devilments wrote: »

I was warned by another nurse to watch my back before I started on this ward as she said that I shouldn't be afraid to stand up for myself. I didn't know what she meant at the time and didn't ask her to elaborate but now I do...

.....but this micro-managing care assistant and nurse manager will not address anything DIRECTLY to me. There is no line of communication between me and them

....but they will not address ANTYHING directly to me.

Its like if you have a problem with my work, speak to me directly and I'll try a different approach; but NOTHING.

Have you yourself directly approached the Nurse Manager and directly complained about this behaviour? This kind of passive-aggressive stuff is bullying and you need to make a DIRECT complaint about it to your line manager. If she does nothing about it, then go to her manager, or HR, or your Union.

If this is a HSE hospital, they are signed up to Dignity At Work policies - go have a look at them on the website.

You will need to keep a record of all instances of bullying behaviour, but you also need to ask the care assistant to STOP doing this and to make any remarks directly to you. You are the Staff Nurse and her line manager when you are both on duty. Nip it in the bud as fast as you can.

If you don't do this now, she will carry on doing it.

Merkin

Is there a HR Department in the hospital?

LegacyUser

No theres not a HR department. It's a small enough place. only a few wards. In the previous ward the staff were great. I'm not going to let this person dictate my practice as the previous poster said, but it's difficult because its a small area and they all know each other years, the carers, housekeeping, and nurses. A lot of them a related to each other in some way as well as it's such a local hospital.

I feel if I make a complaint I will only alienate myself from the staff further and get a reputation, which is the last thing I want.

LegacyUser

Go directly to your nurse manager & discuss the situation with her. If you don't want to address it directly, then just say you'd like her feedback on how you're doing since you started there and this will bring up any issues she may have with you. I'm guessing she won't have anything too negative to say to you as it seems to be the carer that is carrying out this campaign on you. Then bring up how the carer is acting with you and ask for her opinion, however this needs to be handled delicately if they are friends.

Don't let the carer bully you. I'm not sure how hospitals work but I'm sure you as a nurse are senior to the carer, so put her in her place in a nice way when she tries to criticise you or put you down.

If all else fails, you will have to go down the formal route as you shouldn't have to put up with this. Best of luck and try not to stress about it.

JuliusCaesar

devilments wrote: »

No theres not a HR department. It's a small enough place. only a few wards. In the previous ward the staff were great. I'm not going to let this person dictate my practice as the previous poster said, but it's difficult because its a small area and they all know each other years, the carers, housekeeping, and nurses. A lot of them a related to each other in some way as well as it's such a local hospital.

I feel if I make a complaint I will only alienate myself from the staff further and get a reputation, which is the last thing I want.

How to be assertive

Being assertive is about being respectful of yourself and of other people. It's not being passive, and it's not about being aggressive. It's about communicating your needs directly without being rude or disrespectful. It's really worth looking into as it is a way of communicating that is useful in every aspect of life, not just at work.

Good luck with talking directly to the CA! She may be well-known locally for being difficult or passive-aggressive, so don't worry too much about your reputation - she's already got a bad one, or the other nurse wouldn't have warned you.

Mrs OBumble

Do you have any other nurse colleagues you can go to for advice about how to handle the situation? Or a union rep?