Cookies

MonkieSocks

A man goes down to a flea market and a vendor calls him over.

"Sir, come on over!" the vendor shouts.

The man approaches him and the vendor ecstatically exclaims,

"I have here a box of incredible dancing cookies!"

The man, curious, peers into the box, and sure enough- there is a slew of personified cookies!

They are just groovin' out, having a grand time.

The man recognizes that this defies many of the laws of the universe and decides to purchase the cookies.

Satisfied, he takes the box and puts it in his trunk.

He begins to drive home.

He lives on a hill overlooking a lake, and when he starts to ascend it, he hears a terrible clanking sound.

He freaks out, believing that it may be his engine breaking down, and subsequently pulls over.

He gets out of the car, and with the engine off, the sound is still prominent.

He opens the trunk and realizes that it is coming from the dancing cookies!

He opens the box and tells them,

"Cookies, please stop, that really scared me."

They agree to subside, and the man continues driving up the hill.

After another few minutes, however, a similar sound occurs.

Just to be safe, the man pulls over again.

He opens the trunk, and it is indeed the dancing cookies.

"Sorry dude, we just couldn't contain ourselves," the cookies explained in unison.

"Okay," says the man. "But if you do it one more time I'm going to get very upset."

He keeps driving up the hill and it happens again.

"THAT'S THE LAST STRAW, COOKIES!" the man shouts after opening the box.

"IF YOU DANCE LIKE THAT AGAIN BEFORE WE GET HOME I AM GOING TO TAKE YOU AND THROW YOU IN THE LAKE!"

The cookies peer up with fear in their eyes and agree to adhere to his requests.

But alas, they are unable.

Mere yards before reaching the man's home, the car starts making terrible noises.

The man brakes violently in the middle of the road, opens the door, scrambles to the trunk, opens it, takes the box of dancing cookies, and throws them in the lake.

---

A fellow named John decides he wants to ask his girlfriend of three years- Elizabeth- for her hand in marriage.

He takes her out to the restaurant where they had their first date, and they are seated.

"I'm going to run into the restroom," John says, but he steps outside for some fresh air.

He's nervous about what he's going to say.

He takes the diamond ring from his pocket and starts going over what he's going to say.

"Elizabeth, will you marry me?" John mutters under his breath.

His hands are shaking and in his nervousness the ring falls from his hands and down the storm drain on the curb.

John freaks out, frantically trying to determine where it could be going.

He had spent so much of his savings on this ring!

But in recognition that finding it would be unlikely, he goes back inside to enjoy his dinner.

The waitress comes over and he orders a salad. Elizabeth asks,

"Could you tell me about your trout?"

The waitress replies,

"Yes, it is quite delicious... we catch it from the river right by our restaurant.

Elizabeth is convinced and orders the trout. It comes out a half hour later.

She cuts into the fish and what's inside?

THE DANCING COOKIES!