Unwanted male attention

meoklmrk91

I started a new course in September, I am quite a friendly person and would chat to anyone, everyone has been great apart from one guy. He seems to be quite sexist, thinks there are some jobs for women and others for men, doing group work if he doesn't want to do something he will hand it over to a woman to do it. He makes quite sexist comments and has made some weird sort of slyly sexual comments to me. He doesn't seem to have any respect for female teachers either.

He sort of follows me around and on a number of occasions has tried to tell me what to do, I was talking about switching classes, not even to him and he butted in and told me not to leave and wouldn't stop, it ended with me telling him that I was going to do whatever I wanted to do, the other day he for some reason came up to me and told me I should be a Doctor, I said I didn't want to but he followed me around for the whole day saying it, I ended up basically telling him politely to feck off by saying that if he was so interested he should go and be a doctor.

He seems a little unstable, he constantly swears under his breath and goes around the place singing, I worry that some day he might try and follow me to where I get my public transport. Tbh he freaks me out. He seems to have very outdated views about women, has very little respect for them, and I actually don't like him, I just want him to leave me alone. I have gone from politely brushing him off, to just brushing him off and now just ignoring him basically. I don't know what else I can do? I am actually thinking of going to the staff and speaking to them about it, even just to make them aware of what's going on.

2Mad2BeMad

meoklmrk91 wrote: »

I started a new course in September, I am quite a friendly person and would chat to anyone, everyone has been great apart from one guy. He seems to be quite sexist, thinks there are some jobs for women and others for men, doing group work if he doesn't want to do something he will hand it over to a woman to do it. He makes quite sexist comments and has made some weird sort of slyly sexual comments to me. He doesn't seem to have any respect for female teachers either.

He sort of follows me around and on a number of occasions has tried to tell me what to do, I was talking about switching classes, not even to him and he butted in and told me not to leave and wouldn't stop, it ended with me telling him that I was going to do whatever I wanted to do, the other day he for some reason came up to me and told me I should be a Doctor, I said I didn't want to but he followed me around for the whole day saying it, I ended up basically telling him politely to feck off by saying that if he was so interested he should go and be a doctor.

He seems a little unstable, he constantly swears under his breath and goes around the place singing, I worry that some day he might try and follow me to where I get my public transport. Tbh he freaks me out. He seems to have very outdated views about women, has very little respect for them, and I actually don't like him, I just want him to leave me alone. I have gone from politely brushing him off, to just brushing him off and now just ignoring him basically. I don't know what else I can do? I am actually thinking of going to the staff and speaking to them about it, even just to make them aware of what's going on.

Tell a member of staff your being harassed by him, they will have a word with him give him a warning
He will back off then.
If that does not stop the fool then tell the staff again, except this time mention his sexist remarks about women and that he follows you around and verbally abuses you, which is a form of bullying.
Then he will get kicked off the course

The only reason I'm saying doing the first is because you seem like a nice person , but if it were me I'd go straight to the second thing I mentioned

Staff normally give a warning first, then kick off , unless its really serious
but to me it just seems like harassment, either that or he likes ya and is just nervous haha

TBH it sounds like some ejit I know, do you happen to be going to Tallaght IT? (I wont mention any names or anything)


You should'nt have to switch classes over some muppet annoying you, ask your class mates what they think of him, and if they see him harassing you.
Better to have a witness to it then just yourself
No point switching classes when you enjoy everyone elses company

meoklmrk91

2Mad2BeMad wrote: »

Tell a member of staff your being harassed by him, they will have a word with him give him a warning
He will back off then.
If that does not stop the fool then tell the staff again, except this time mention his sexist remarks about women and that he follows you around and verbally abuses you, which is a form of bullying.
Then he will get kicked off the course

The only reason I'm saying doing the first is because you seem like a nice person , but if it were me I'd go straight to the second thing I mentioned

Staff normally give a warning first, then kick off , unless its really serious
but to me it just seems like harassment, either that or he likes ya and is just nervous haha

TBH it sounds like some ejit I know, do you happen to be going to Tallaght IT? (I wont mention any names or anything)


You should'nt have to switch classes over some muppet annoying you, ask your class mates what they think of him, and if they see him harassing you.
Better to have a witness to it then just yourself
No point switching classes when you enjoy everyone elses company

Thanks for the response, not going to tallaght it

I wasn't going switching classes over him, completely different reason, he just heard me discussing it with a teacher and decided to stick his nose in.

I think I will mention it to the staff, even if they don't do anything at least then if anything more serious does happen they will have known and it will give me more ground to stand on.

I don't know if he likes me and to be honest I don't care, the way he acts its almost as if he thinks he has some sort of ownership of me. I don't like him even to chat to never mind anything else. I thought at first it might just be because he is from a different country that things might be getting lost in translation, that I was picking up his intentions wrong but I don't think that anymore.

I have mentioned it to another classmate, he had noticed him following me around the place and when I told him the full story he told me I should tell the staff. The worst is he isn't liked by my other classmates, so I could be talking to them and he will come over and they will move away to get away from him, when I try to move away, being to be honest quite rude and dismissive of him he will follow me. It's more annoying than anything really as despite what I do he just does not seem to want to get the message. I don't really know what else I can do apart from telling to F off.

YumCha

If his behaviour is scaring you - this is past the point of polite hints and ignoring him hoping he'll cop on. Your instincts are right - you need to go to staff, and maybe take someone who can corroborate things - as sometimes the people you are reporting it to can unintentionally brush it off in a "oh he's harmless" type of way. You need this to be taken seriously.