Dodgy behaviour?

LegacyUser

Hi all,my missus is going to a foriegn country for a couple of days soon,she has a male facebook friend that shes never met but has been talking to online for years,i recently discovered that shes been messaging him to meet up when shes there,shes going for work but has a day or two free at the end,from the texts its her thats doing all the running eg,oh you live there?ill be going there what a coincidence etc.now i havent said anything to her because im not one for controlling,she can do as she pleases and live with the consequences,what are peoples thoughts on this??

jdsk2006

Bulls**t behaviour, would have her bags packed. Total disrespect to you.

How are you so calm?

StickyIcky

She been saying anything flirty? I was going to met someone online overseas once but we both knew it was for doing the dodgy. :-) she hasn't said anything to you then it sounds dodgy. Maybe she hasn't arranged the dodgy yet but she probably hoping for it or suspecting it might happen. I'd wait till and give her a chance to say something to you. If she doesn't then it's up to you what to do. But if that happened to me I'd break up with her, not tell her why, break all contact, block her number etc, forget about her, move on and find am honest girl, there's plenty of them out there.

Legs.Eleven

Has she given you any reason to be suspicious that there's something more between them?

thegreatgonzo

I think it's a bit odd that someone has friends on facebook that they have never met. I was never one for penpals male or female but I don't get why anyone would be into it unless they were very lonely. So I suppose looking at it from one angle maybe she is just curious about meeting him and there is nothing dodgy about it. It doe sound suspect to me but I think it's also odd that you are not asking her. Maybe what you think would be controlling behaviour your girlfriend would actually think is you paying her attention.
I wouldn't do what your girlfriend is doing but also I wouldn't like to be going out with someone who acted like he didn't care that I was going abroad to meet some fella for possibly dubious reasons.

CaraMay

Very dodgy because it's being kept a secret. I think I would say nothing til she comes back, keep checking her conversations with him and if she has cheated then you will have proof. Make sure you keep screen shots.

Stavro Mueller

What makes you think there's something dodgy going on? Maybe she just wants to meet her friend in person and this is a great opportunity to do so.

thegreatgonzo

I wouldn't wait till she comes back why not just ask her before she goes?

wirelessdude01

How did you find out? Were you going through her facebook?

LegacyUser

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

Has she given you any reason to be suspicious that there's something more between them?

Well,i did read in messages before my time her tellin him she thought he was hot,she doesnt know i have seen this,and i remarked once upon seeing his picture on facebook hed be a good looking guy,and she replied quite convincingly,god no,which i knew was a lie,and the tone of the messages is that shes making sure of an opportunity to meet,and the fact that it hasnt been said,she also behaved dodgy before,stayed at a male collegues house overnight and lied about where she stayed because she was afraid id go mad apparently,found messages about that night between the two of them indicating that while nothing happened,she had made excuses to get staying at the guys house!

CaraMay

Are you married to her?

YbFocus

I would have been gone after that college episode! Wake up man, you sound like a nice guy but too quiet for his own good, there'll be another one out there for ya, there's no shortage!

miamee

OP it sounds like you have been checking up on this girl since day one, even reading messages from before you got together (if I understood that correctly) and trying to catch her out?

If you are that suspicious and paranoid all of the time, perhaps she'd rather do without the hassle of telling you she might meet up with this guy.

The only way to find out her motive in meeting him is to ask her outright before she goes I think.

beano345

miamee wrote: »

OP it sounds like you have been checking up on this girl since day one, even reading messages from before you got together (if I understood that correctly) and trying to catch her out?

If you are that suspicious and paranoid all of the time, perhaps she'd rather do without the hassle of telling you she might meet up with this guy.

The only way to find out her motive in meeting him is to ask her outright before she goes I think.

he probably still wont get the truth though

CaraMay

beano345 wrote: »

he probably still wont get the truth though

Exactly. He has to catch her out and then dump her cos it doesn't seem like he will otherwise

miamee

beano345 wrote: »

he probably still wont get the truth though

Surely he could tell if she was being truthful or not though? Maybe not, OP didn't mention how long they are together.

MagicMarker

Your girlfriend is going to a foreign country to meet a man she met online, and she's doing this behind your back?

Yeah, I'd be telling her not to bother coming back.

beano345

i dunno ive been in his spot before were they swore blind nothing was going on ,only for it all to come out in the end,surely its a bit suspicious?

Legs.Eleven

MagicMarker wrote: »

Your girlfriend is going to a foreign country to meet a man she met online, and she's doing this behind your back?

Yeah, I'd be telling her not to bother coming back.

She's going for work and will be there anyway.

MagicMarker

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

She's going for work and will be there anyway.

How convenient.

Legs.Eleven

MagicMarker wrote: »

How convenient.

I can't see any reason why he'd be suspicious.

LegacyUser

miamee wrote: »

OP it sounds like you have been checking up on this girl since day one, even reading messages from before you got together (if I understood that correctly) and trying to catch her out?

If you are that suspicious and paranoid all of the time, perhaps she'd rather do without the hassle of telling you she might meet up with this guy.

The only way to find out her motive in meeting him is to ask her outright before she goes I think.

Na,on the first occasion i caught her out in something she said while i was away working over the phone that gave away false information she was feeding me,when i got home i did my homework to be sure before saying anything and was right about it,this time i smelled a rat and already suspected her eagerness to go to the specific country without having to go and the experience of knowing the character,knowing that guy lives there made me suspicious,i dont look through anything unless theres a valid reason first,we are getting married,and there are kids involved which complicates things obviously,i havent said anything because of the type of person she is to argue with,she would have made an exellent lawyer and could twist it around and make me the wrong one for snooping and soforth,when clearly shes in the wrong,as this is something you wouldnt do for safety reasons before any other reasons came into it imo!

LegacyUser

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

I can't see any reason why he'd be suspicious.

Really?i know shes going to a particular city,shes already told him she would have to go to the town where he lives,which is well out of her way,she thinks hes hot,and hasnt told me shes going to meet him,youd have to be a bit concerned,no?

CaraMay

She is gamey and looking for some excitement elsewhere. If she won't talk to you then the very last thing you should be doing is marrying the girl.

Red Crow

Dodgydan wrote: »

Really?i know shes going to a particular city,shes already told him she would have to go to the town where he lives,which is well out of her way,she thinks hes hot,and hasnt told me shes going to meet him,youd have to be a bit concerned,no?

Let's call a spade, a spade. She's going over to have sex with this fella. It's the connivence of work that brings them together. If I was you I'd have her out of the house.

If she had nothing to hide she would tell you her plans. Personally I'd get rid of her ASAP. You already are suspicious of her and she sounds like a secretive person. Honestly, what is in this relationship for you?

Legs.Eleven

Dodgydan wrote: »

Really?i know shes going to a particular city,shes already told him she would have to go to the town where he lives,which is well out of her way,she thinks hes hot,and hasnt told me shes going to meet him,youd have to be a bit concerned,no?

In fairness, you've just added on a few extra details I didn't know about.


I'd be concerned, yes, so you should probably confront her but I advice you to try and keep cool. Don't lose it with her but you should say something. It does sound suspicious.

Stavro Mueller

The real problem here is that you don't trust her. Even if there are perfectly innocent explanations for these admittedly suspicious actions, you're not buying them. So actually, even if she isn't planning anything untoward with this guy you're not going to believe a word coming out of her mouth.

listermint

cymbaline wrote: »

The real problem here is that you don't trust her. Even if there are perfectly innocent explanations for these admittedly suspicious actions, you're not buying them. So actually, even if she isn't planning anything untoward with this guy you're not going to believe a word coming out of her mouth.

Lol

The real problem here is she is untrustworthy, it has nothing to do with the op she is going around behind his back in secret talking to other men. There is the real problem, if she really feels the need to do that then perhaps she shouldn't be seeing the op at all.

johnnybegood

I think another big problem here is the safety side of things. Regardless of her intensions, you want her to be safe. This guy might have different intentions. He could be a serious freak hidden behind a "hot guys" facebook page.

That side of things would actually bug me more.

Stavro Mueller

listermint wrote: »

Lol

The real problem here is she is untrustworthy, it has nothing to do with the op she is going around behind his back in secret talking to other men. There is the real problem, if she really feels the need to do that then perhaps she shouldn't be seeing the op at all.

It's not up to us to decide for the OP whether she's cheating or not. That's something he's going to have to make a judgement call on himself.

And on the second point, he referred to her as his missus. So either they're married or they're living together. That makes it messier.

discus

Dodgydan wrote: »

Well,i did read in messages before my time her tellin him she thought he was hot,she doesnt know i have seen this,and i remarked once upon seeing his picture on facebook hed be a good looking guy,and she replied quite convincingly,god no,which i knew was a lie,and the tone of the messages is that shes making sure of an opportunity to meet,and the fact that it hasnt been said,she also behaved dodgy before,stayed at a male collegues house overnight and lied about where she stayed because she was afraid id go mad apparently,found messages about that night between the two of them indicating that while nothing happened,she had made excuses to get staying at the guys house!

We've all been there, man. Ignoring the blatent obvious signs, because there's no damning evidence, but just enough that later on, it will all have seemed so bloody obvious.

Dodgydan

Eh, I'm going on holidays soon and I do have a friend on facebook I've never met since it's another continent and from another online forum. And it would be nice to meet up if I'm there anyway. He's just a friend, I won't be devastated if we don't, and I don't think I should have my bags packed for me
OP may know better but going simply on the facts given I don't see the issue if it's a work trip anyway

Are you reading all her texts behind her back OP? You seem awfully suspicious

Dodgydan wrote: »

Well,i did read in messages before my time her tellin him she thought he was hot,she doesnt know i have seen this,and i remarked once upon seeing his picture on facebook hed be a good looking guy,and she replied quite convincingly,god no,which i knew was a lie,and the tone of the messages is that shes making sure of an opportunity to meet,and the fact that it hasnt been said,she also behaved dodgy before,stayed at a male collegues house overnight and lied about where she stayed because she was afraid id go mad apparently,found messages about that night between the two of them indicating that while nothing happened,she had made excuses to get staying at the guys house!

On the other hand this seems a bit much ... but then she might be lying because she knows you're so suspicious and jealous? And checking her texts behind her back?

It's hard to know here, I wouldn't call it clear cut either way

ElleEm

OP, why would you want to marry this girl if she lies to you, is decieving you and you don' t trust her to tge point where you are invading her privacy. By the sounds of it, this is an old behaviour that is unlikely to change. Can you do this forever?

Legs.Eleven

bluewolf wrote: »

Eh, I'm going on holidays soon and I do have a friend on facebook I've never met since it's another continent and from another online forum. And it would be nice to meet up if I'm there anyway. He's just a friend, I won't be devastated if we don't, and I don't think I should have my bags packed for me
OP may know better but going simply on the facts given I don't see the issue if it's a work trip anyway

Are you reading all her texts behind her back OP? You seem awfully suspicious


On the other hand this seems a bit much ... but then she might be lying because she knows you're so suspicious and jealous? And checking her texts behind her back?

It's hard to know here, I wouldn't call it clear cut either way

I've a very good friend in England who I met when the internet was just getting popular back in the late 90s, we both visited each other and have been good mates ever since.


I suppose the issue is that she's didn't tell him about this guy. Either she has something to hide or she knew you'd overreact. To automatically presume something is up is jumping the gun a bit. As Bluewolf, it's not clear cut.

wirelessdude01

One question, why are you marrying this woman when it is clear as day that you don't trust her one bit? Really that is the root of everything here, TRUST.

Chazz Michael Michaels

She sounds like a right catch...

DUMP HER.

LegacyUser

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

I've a very good friend in England who I met when the internet was just getting popular back in the late 90s, we both visited each other and have been good mates ever since.


I suppose the issue is that she's didn't tell him about this guy. Either she has something to hide or she knew you'd overreact. To automatically presume something is up is jumping the gun a bit. As Bluewolf, it's not clear cut.

Im not jumping any guns here,im asking the question is this behaviour dodgy?i havent come to any conclusions as such,and im basing my thoughts on the fact that i wouldnt be at it myself its not cool in my book even if its benign,simply because theres been no mention of it,and im not the jealous suspicious type,someone elses behaviour is making me suspicious
I wasnt looking for an excuse to pry,also,it would seem that some of the posters on here think its possibly benign enough,but if a man was doing the same thing he would get torn apart on this forum imo

CaraMay

Dodgydan wrote: »

,it would seem that some of the posters on here think its possibly benign enough,but if a man was doing the same thing he would get torn apart on this forum imo

Most people think its dodgy and she has been torn apart. Sounds like you have your mind made up.

Legs.Eleven

Dodgydan wrote: »

Im not jumping any guns here,im asking the question is this behaviour dodgy?i havent come to any conclusions as such,and im basing my thoughts on the fact that i wouldnt be at it myself its not cool in my book even if its benign,simply because theres been no mention of it,and im not the jealous suspicious type,someone elses behaviour is making me suspicious
I wasnt looking for an excuse to pry,also,it would seem that some of the posters on here think its possibly benign enough,but if a man was doing the same thing he would get torn apart on this forum imo

Yep. I knew that line would get pulled out hence why I was cautious to post at all. She has been torn apart in this thread already. Every single PI in here regardless of gender always has a divided opinion so I really don't know what you're on about. It has nothing to do with you being a man.



I can see both points of view and as my post says, nothing is clear cut. Not sure what you're problem with my post is?


If you believe something is up, confront her about it. I'm not sure what advice you're looking for if you've already made your mind up. The title of your post was "Dodgy behaviour?" as a question. If you don't want opinions, then don't post. Very simple.

You know her better than I do. I just didn't want to jump on the usual "End it" band wagon as I'm in a relationship myself and know there's always two sides to every story and I'd usually be more in the "Innocent until proven guilty" camp, particularly when she's obviously a good enough woman that you're in a relationship with her.

letssee7

Dodgydan wrote: »

Im not jumping any guns here,im asking the question is this behaviour dodgy?i havent come to any conclusions as such,and im basing my thoughts on the fact that i wouldnt be at it myself its not cool in my book even if its benign,simply because theres been no mention of it,and im not the jealous suspicious type,someone elses behaviour is making me suspicious
I wasnt looking for an excuse to pry,also,it would seem that some of the posters on here think its possibly benign enough,but if a man was doing the same thing he would get torn apart on this forum imo

Yeah I can't understand how anyone can defend her even a bit. Clearly there is a reason you snooped and your gut feeling was right, would you go out of your way to meet a hot girl, keep it a secret from your partner and expect any sympathy? Even if it didn't go through people would say you were a waste of space.

She is a lying whore, bring it up and you'll see a major reaction, probably focused on your snooping along with some waterworks, do not fall for the waterworks stay calm and distant. If it was innocent she'd probably laugh it off, but I can guarantee you she wants him and he absolutely wants her do you can expect the reaction.

She doesn't deserve a bf.

Legs.Eleven

letssee7 wrote: »

Yeah I can't understand how anyone can defend her even a bit. Clearly there is a reason you snooped and your gut feeling was right, would you go out of your way to meet a hot girl, keep it a secret from your partner and expect any sympathy? Even if it didn't go through people would say you were a waste of space.

She is a lying whore, bring it up and you'll see a major reaction, probably focused on your snooping along with some waterworks, do not fall for the waterworks stay calm and distant. If it was innocent she'd probably laugh it off, but I can guarantee you she wants him and he absolutely wants her do you can expect the reaction.

She doesn't deserve a bf.

Now. There's someone calling your girlfriend a "lying whore". Hopefully that's more to your liking, OP.

Czarcasm

letssee7 wrote: »

Yeah I can't understand how anyone can defend her even a bit. Clearly there is a reason you snooped and your gut feeling was right, would you go out of your way to meet a hot girl, keep it a secret from your partner and expect any sympathy? Even if it didn't go through people would say you were a waste of space.

She is a lying whore, bring it up and you'll see a major reaction, probably focused on your snooping along with some waterworks, do not fall for the waterworks stay calm and distant. If it was innocent she'd probably laugh it off, but I can guarantee you she wants him and he absolutely wants her do you can expect the reaction.

She doesn't deserve a bf.

A lying whore?

You don't even know the girl, you only have one side of the story, you don't know anything about the dynamics of their relationship, and you come up with that nonsense?

I won't even bother addressing the rest of your silly speculation tbh, it's only on a par with some of the online vitriol expressed in this thread and a similar thread we had here last week.

OP to be perfectly honest about it your relationship really doesn't sound healthy from either side, there seems to be no trust there and tbh I can understand why your girlfriend would be reluctant to open up to you when you're snooping around on her online activity and drawing all sorts of conclusions about her motives.

You're pushing your girlfriend away tbh and it might be better for both your sakes if you let her go and you go your own way.

letssee7

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

Now. There's someone calling your girlfriend a "lying whore". Hopefully that's more to your liking, OP.

She has already lied to sleep at a male colleagues house before.

If I did what she is doing I would expect to be dumped when it was found out.

What could her side of the story be, I'm just going out of my way to see this hot guy I've flirted with online and never met before. We're great friends even though our relationship was built on attraction. I didn't tell you because its something that people in relationships don't do and I didn't want to face any consequences.

I mean she is absolutely blatantly in the wrong here- does op physically have to catch her having sex with him?

wirelessdude01

Czarcasm wrote: »

A lying whore?

You don't even know the girl, you only have one side of the story, you don't know anything about the dynamics of their relationship, and you come up with that nonsense?

I won't even bother addressing the rest of your silly speculation tbh, it's only on a par with some of the online vitriol expressed in this thread and a similar thread we had here last week.

OP to be perfectly honest about it your relationship really doesn't sound healthy from either side, there seems to be no trust there and tbh I can understand why your girlfriend would be reluctant to open up to you when you're snooping around on her online activity and drawing all sorts of conclusions about her motives.

You're pushing your girlfriend away tbh and it might be better for both your sakes if you let her go and you go your own way.

Whatever about the snooping etc the girlfriend is being sneaky, no way anyone can paint that any different.

beano345

her tellin him she thought he was hot.......upon seeing his picture on facebook hed be a good looking guy,and she replied quite convincingly,god no,which i knew was a lie

this speaks volumes ive heard this a lot of times.....OMG i hate that guy but really holding a secret crush,funny how a lot of posters are saying its benign but if in your shoes would be going crazy!ive a funny feeling you'll be back on this forum after finding out the truth i really hope not though!

Czarcasm

wirelessdude01 wrote: »

Whatever about the snooping etc the girlfriend is being sneaky, no way anyone can paint that any different.

True wirelessdude, his girlfriend IS no doubt being dishonest with the OP, but as the OP explained himself, she was afraid he'd be mad at her, that's a completely understandable reason that probably says a lot more about the OP being very insecure, especially when he admits himself that after checking her text messages, he still found out they hadn't done anything -

Dodgydan wrote: »

Well,i did read in messages before my time her tellin him she thought he was hot, she doesnt know i have seen this, and i remarked once upon seeing his picture on facebook hed be a good looking guy, and she replied quite convincingly, god no, which i knew was a lie, and the tone of the messages is that shes making sure of an opportunity to meet, and the fact that it hasnt been said,she also behaved dodgy before, stayed at a male collegues house overnight and lied about where she stayed because she was afraid id go mad apparently, found messages about that night between the two of them indicating that while nothing happened, she had made excuses to get staying at the guys house!

So all we have is -

She stayed at a mates house and nothing happened.

She's going over to another country for work, and it's an opportunity for her to meet up with one of her mates she's talked to online for years...


It'd take a hell of a lot more than the examples above for me to be convinced she has any intentions of cheating on her boyfriend. In fact I'm more bewildered as to why she stays with him tbh.

MagicMarker

Czarcasm wrote: »

It'd take a hell of a lot more than the examples above for me to be convinced she has any intentions of cheating on her boyfriend. In fact I'm more bewildered as to why she stays with him tbh.

Oh come on. If your partner was going out of their way to meet someone of the opposite sex who they met online and was keeping it from you, you wouldn't have ANY concerns that maybe there could be something more than friendship there? Frankly anyone who says yes to that is a liar tbh.

Czarcasm

MagicMarker wrote: »

Oh come on. If your partner was going out of their way to meet someone of the opposite sex who they met online and was keeping it from you, you wouldn't have ANY concerns that maybe there could be something more than friendship there? Frankly anyone who says yes to that is a liar tbh.

But that's just it MagicMarker - the OP's girlfriend ISN'T going out of her way, she's going over there with work, if work wasn't paying for it she wouldn't be going over to meet a guy she's by the OP's own admission - known for years, even before she met the OP. She was keeping it from him because the OP obviously has form for this craic of over-reacting, as shown by the way again, by his own admission, he went checking his girlfriend's phone only to find out she stayed with a mate (of the opposite sex), and didn't want to tell him about it because she figured again - he'd over-react.

Now instead of sitting her down and talking to his girlfriend, the OP runs to the internet for validation of his suspicions that quite frankly he's pulled out of nowhere, and all because he goes snooping behind his girlfriends back, and she can't tell him anything. Between them they've created a viscous and toxic circle of mistrust and insecurity that's not healthy for either of them.

The question wouldn't arise with myself and my wife tbh because to coin a phrase used by the OP himself - what my wife does is her own business, I don't "need" to trust her, because I have no reason NOT to trust her. We can actually talk to each other, that openness is there, we have no reason to lie to each other.

I don't go snooping on her laptop or phone, and she doesn't go snooping on mine. Do I have things on my laptop and phone I'd be embarrassed about if she found them?

Damn right I do, but my wife respects my privacy and I respect hers. I'm sure we all have stuff on our laptops and phones we'd be embarrassed about our other half seeing, so in order for trust to be there, first you have to respect each other, and it doesn't sound to me like the OP knows a whole lot about that, which leads to his girlfriend only respecting him out of fear, and to her being afraid to trust him enough to tell him anything without him over-reacting and drawing all sorts of conclusions.

I would hope though the OP has enough cop on and respect that he wouldn't agree to his girlfriend, or any girl for that matter, being referred to as "a lying whore".

beano345

Czarcasm wrote: »

But that's just it MagicMarker - the OP's girlfriend ISN'T going out of her way, she's going over there with work, if work wasn't paying for it she wouldn't be going over to meet a guy she's by the OP's own admission - known for years, even before she met the OP. She was keeping it from him because the OP obviously has form for this craic of over-reacting, as shown by the way again, by his own admission, he went checking his girlfriend's phone only to find out she stayed with a mate (of the opposite sex), and didn't want to tell him about it because she figured again - he'd over-react.

Now instead of sitting her down and talking to his girlfriend, the OP runs to the internet for validation of his suspicions that quite frankly he's pulled out of nowhere, and all because he goes snooping behind his girlfriends back, and she can't tell him anything. Between them they've created a viscous and toxic circle of mistrust and insecurity that's not healthy for either of them.

The question wouldn't arise with myself and my wife tbh because to coin a phrase used by the OP himself - what my wife does is her own business, I don't "need" to trust her, because I have no reason NOT to trust her. We can actually talk to each other, that openness is there, we have no reason to lie to each other.

I don't go snooping on her laptop or phone, and she doesn't go snooping on mine. Do I have things on my laptop and phone I'd be embarrassed about if she found them?

Damn right I do, but my wife respects my privacy and I respect hers. I'm sure we all have stuff on our laptops and phones we'd be embarrassed about our other half seeing, so in order for trust to be there, first you have to respect each other, and it doesn't sound to me like the OP knows a whole lot about that, which leads to his girlfriend only respecting him out of fear, and to her being afraid to trust him enough to tell him anything without him over-reacting and drawing all sorts of conclusions.

I would hope though the OP has enough cop on and respect that he wouldn't agree to his girlfriend, or any girl for that matter, being referred to as "a lying whore".

ah come off it if my girlfriend was getting suspicious about some stranger i found online or was getting insecure about it id end the online stranger thing fairly rapidly

Czarcasm

beano345 wrote: »

ah come off it if my girlfriend was getting suspicious about some stranger i found online or was getting insecure about it id end the online stranger thing fairly rapidly

Seriously beano? Why? Why entertain someones insecurities? At that rate you'd be left with no friends of your own (well, even no female friends of your own), and I'm sure that's not the case, right?

I have plenty of female friends and I've slept over in their houses and they've slept over in mine when we visit each other because it's handy and we have a bit of a laugh, rather than one of us staying in a hotel.

My wife just got back from Cork earlier on after a night down there with her mates -

"Did you have a good time?"

"I'd a great time!"

"Cool"

And that's it! There's no interrogation, there's no "Did you meet anyone hmm?", none of that crap, because all I needed to know was that my wife enjoyed herself, as opposed to the OP where he SAYS he's not controlling, he SAYS his girlfriend can do what she likes...

And follows that up with how he checks up on her online activity and her phone and draws conclusions about what she must be getting up to and she has to be lying to him even though he's already found himself out to be wrong before.

Not controlling? I'd say there isn't an eggshell left in the place that hasn't been stepped on.

beano345

Czarcasm wrote: »

Seriously beano? Why? Why entertain someones insecurities? At that rate you'd be left with no friends of your own (well, even no female friends of your own), and I'm sure that's not the case, right?

I have plenty of female friends and I've slept over in their houses and they've slept over in mine when we visit each other because it's handy and we have a bit of a laugh, rather than one of us staying in a hotel.

My wife just got back from Cork earlier on after a night down there with her mates -

"Did you have a good time?"

"I'd a great time!"

"Cool"

And that's it! There's no interrogation, there's no "Did you meet anyone hmm?", none of that crap, because all I needed to know was that my wife enjoyed herself, as opposed to the OP where he SAYS he's not controlling, he SAYS his girlfriend can do what she likes...

And follows that up with how he checks up on her online activity and her phone and draws conclusions about what she must be getting up to and she has to be lying to him even though he's already found himself out to be wrong before.

Not controlling? I'd say there isn't an eggshell left in the place that hasn't been stepped on.

yeah seriously,ive girl mates of my own but theres boundaries,the ops girlfriend is doing some serious skulking,as i said before if my girlfriend was getting upset about it and i was carrying on like that id drop it...thats respect!id nearly put money on it its not going to be a good outcome for the op,ive been that soldier before