Young man feeling so lost in life

LegacyUser

I'm 22 years old and I feel so lost. So many things have changed in my life and I can't cope. I just finished college back in May in languages. Since then, I have been unemployed with the odd bit of coverwork and leaving cert grinds. I also suffer with depression and anxiety which crippled me during college and was glad to finally put studying behind me. I did a TEFL course but nobody is willing to hire me because I have no experience (even for jobs abroad). I am applying everywhere (even for temp work in shops) but nobody will give me a chance even if I appear confident, enthusiastic and show my personality. It's all 1/2/3 years experience.

People keep telling me to move abroad but my depression is quite bad that I just don't feel ready to move in the short term. I don't adjust to change easily and the idea of moving abroad all alone scares me. I have applied for a government job in France which I won't find out about until May. It's to become an English language teacher in the school system. I'm trying my best to keep myself entertained (reading books, meeting friends, clean at home, give out CVs). I've tried finding new hobbies but they all seem to start in September. (Well the ones near me in Dublin) I just don't want to waste the year doing nothing. It's sad to see my friends have a job and me unable to be employed.

I know maybe I'm not being realistic by having doubts about moving abroad. But this year has been the first year since my childhood I've been truly happy, I finally made some good friends (having had social anxiety for most of my teens), started anti-depressants and came out as gay and have explored that. Even though I'm at despair with unemployment and lost about what to do with my life, I'm somewhat comfortable in my own skin for the very first time in a long time and it's great. I'm afraid of moving away from it.

Does any of this make sense

Mayboy

Hiya,

Yes it all makes sense. This is life - full of ups and downs and all in between. That said make sure you are keeping an eye on your anxiety and depression - you sound like you are managing it well.
Have you thought about volunteering? Maybe in the St Vincent De Paul? Focus Ireland or similar. Also there are lots of after school language programmes for migrant kids that might need help with english - would you see if there are any close to you?

I think you are great - you had lots on your plate, came through it and are recognising you are finding yourself at last. Keep up the good work. I found Wayne W Dyer really helpful for focusing on the now and creating conditions to expand your life - loss of free stuff of his online.

Good luck.

cnn27

Hey OP, sorry to hear you're having a rough time. Just one thing about the job hunt, have you tried sending your CV to recruitment agencies? There's a huge demand for jobs with languages so if you speak your language(s?) well, they might be able to find you something easily enough in a customer service job or something like that. I graduated with a language degree as well, and thought I'd never get a job as all ads were saying 2-3 years experience, but I got a entry-level job more or less straight away. There's a serious shortage of Irish people with languages, so sometimes the companies can't be as choosy as they'd like to be! It's worth a try anyway, and the agencies will give you some advice as to what type of jobs with languages are available. Hope things start picking up for you soon :-)

LegacyUser

Thanks for the suggestions guys. Both really good ideas I had not thought for. I'd say EducateTogether would be a great way to get some experience. I'll get in touch.

@Cnn that's a really good idea. I might have a look on sigmar recruitment and a few others to get some ideas. I have a high level of Spanish, but my French would be rusty. I've noticed German and scandinavian languages are more in demand.

I guess it's a compendium of things but having finished college and finally accepting being who I am sexuality wise has been a double wammy. It hasn't helped my mood levels.

Thanks

carlop

If you want to go abroad you will get work in Madrid without any problems at all. Just head over there, go onto the website lingobongo.com and within a week you'll be interviewing for lots of teaching positions.

It's a fantastic city to live in for a while, and English teaching is recession-proof.

It's also generally regarded as one of the most gay-friendly cities in Europe.

Mayboy

Great stuff. Being gay is only a small part of who you are. The world is your oyster -go for it & enjoy it.

cnn27

Yeah, definitely get in touch with recruiters (from my own experience Wallace Myers and Hayes are quite good as well). If your Spanish is your strongest language, I'd say stick with that, there seems to be a good demand for Spanish out there so you should be in with a good chance. Don't worry about German and the Scandinavian languages, maybe some languages are more in demand than others, but they're all in demand to some extent so you'll be fine! I would make sure though that if you're offered a job, make sure that you think you'd like it. I've a good bit of experience with multinationals and language roles so if you've any questions, or just want someone to look over your CV, send me a message, and best of luck with it! (And don't let being gay cause you too many sleepless nights, or let it define you either, trust me, once you've accepted it and move on, you realize how little it matters!)

LegacyUser

Thanks for all the helpful comments guys. Yeah I know I appear to be coming to terms with being gay. I have accepted it but it's just the thing that strikes me the most is how my life has radically changed. I have gone for many years denying my sexuality and not having any form of lovelife to recognising those feelings and wanting to finally act on them. That's essentially where I am now.

Mostly, it's just my mood that is really low. I'm going to see my doctor today to see how to tackle my depression. As I said a lot of radical changes have happened (4 year degree finished; accepting being gay; accepting I have depression and anxiety and getting the help I need). I'll just take things one at a time. But it's difficult when you are confused about what you're doing with your life in the short term especially after all these changes.