Blind Date Disasters

Carrie Madshaw

A couple of years ago whilst in a post break up slump, a so-called friend of mine convinced me to go on a blind date with his work colleague. He described the guy as exactly my type and said we'd be great together. He told me he was intelligent, charming and funny and was certain we'd hit it off.

I reluctantly agreed as I trusted my friends opinion and was tired of moping around feeling sorry for myself.

We met at 8pm on a Friday night. I was all dolled up with my outfit planned out days in advance. I was meeting him at Bruxelles and he said he'd be sat at the bar wearing a leather jacket. Kewl.

So I get there with hopes high only to be greeted with a sweaty handshake from an overweight, slightly balding ginger haired man. His opening line was 'Sorry if I stink I came here straight from work!'. He was a programmer, not a personal trainer. He was slurring his words and had Guinness encrusted lips and sweaty armpits.

He proceeded to slam pints of Guinness and talk incessantly about World of Warcraft and gaming websites. I'm not adverse to anyone slamming pints, I was doing the same but on a first date maybe ask the girl a few questions before launching into video game based conversation.

Anyway, I texted my friend saying 'What the hell is wrong with you? Why did you think we'd be suited??' and his respond was a simple 'LOL'.

The bastard ended up coming to the bar a while later with one of his friends and joined us. He could barely wipe the grin off his stupid face but I think it's more cruel than funny.

So, have any of you had any first date or blind date disasters?!

michellie

I would kill your friend if I were you OP

darkpagandeath

Wow players leave the house ? must not have been a Raid Night

Carrie Madshaw

darkpagandeath wrote: »

Wow players leave the house ? must not have been a Raid Night

I barely even know what this means but I like it

NoClues

He sounds like a catch, your loss OP.

wazky

I went on a date once and my date stabbed me in the eyes with a fork rendering me blind.

Is that what you mean by blind date disasters?

Carrie Madshaw

wazky wrote: »

I went on a date once and my date stabbed me in the eyes with a fork rendering me blind.

Is that what you mean by blind date disasters?

BAM.. the old fork in the eye!

Fr_Dougal

It sounds as if your friend has a low opinion of you. Have you considered burning his place of residence down? With fire?

darkpagandeath

Fr_Dougal wrote: »

It sounds as if your friend has a low opinion of you. Have you considered burning his place of residence down? With fire?

You can burn things down without fire what sorcery is this

Banjo String

Am I the only one that thinks the op is actually a bloke, but for some bizarre unknown reason is trying to pass themselves off as a woman?

Possibly wrong. Pics of boobs by pm would cure my doubting.;)

call_me_early

once went on an date with a girl I met online , good looking girl but she replied " yes " and " no " to every single question I asked her the entire evening

her being a looker wasn't enough to compensate for her complete and utter lack of personality

Carrie Madshaw

Banjo String wrote: »

Am I the only one that thinks the op is actually a bloke, but for some bizarre unknown reason is trying to pass themselves off as a woman?

Possibly wrong. Pics of boobs by pm would cure my doubting.;)

Look Gepetto, I'm a real life bo.... girl!!

I'm a girl I promise!! Curious why you think I'm a man?! I thought my feminine charms woulda shone through:(

kowloon

'I'm a level 97 Elf with dual firestorm ability and triple action warblade. Sorry, what was your name again?'

Standard Toaster

What was sexual intercourse like with a hardened level 85 WoW Warlock op?

notnumber

muttered 'for fcuks sake'

Ihatecuddles-old

Went on one blind date. Meeting him outside the cinema in Dundrum, I looked at a guy around my age and thought please dont be the guy in the red jumper. Got a text saying 'Im outside McDonalds, wearing a red jumper' My heart sank.

I was at least 5 inches taller than him. Im sure loads of people wouldnt let that bother them, but I really like when the guy is taller than me, so to be so much taller than him was an instant turn off.

The whole date was really awkward and uncomfortable. I couldnt wait for it to be over, and Im sure he felt the same.

Banjo String

Carrie Madshaw wrote: »

Look Gepetto, I'm a real life bo.... girl!!

I'm a girl I promise!! Curious why you think I'm a man?! I thought my feminine charms woulda shone through:(

My curiosity is satisfied.

Thanks for the pm

Oh look, you have an 'inny' on that one. So cute.

Paddy Fields

Did a few blind dates via the internet thing that were sh!te. One went on about her name being Rosh-een, not Roe-sheen and she only ever drinks champagne. Possibly one of the most self-obsessed boring people I have ever met. I prayed my spleen would burst! Meet a girl in real life from here on in, never that Internet dating thing for me thanks.

Carrie Madshaw

Paddy Fields wrote: »

Did a few blind dates via the internet thing that were sh!te. One went on about her name being Rosh-een, not Roe-sheen and she only ever drinks champagne. Possibly one of the most self-obsessed boring people I have ever met. I prayed my spleen would burst! Meet a girl in real life from here on in, never that Internet dating thing for me thanks.

Haha.. you just reminded me, my 'friend' had also told this bloke that I'm into hip-hop music which I'm not and at one stage he said oh so I hear you like hip-hop and began rapping some yo yo yo type thing in my face with arm gestures included for good measure. I wish I was lying, I sincerely do.

Vision of Disorder

Carrie Madshaw wrote: »

Haha.. you just reminded me, my 'friend' had also told this bloke that I'm into hip-hop music which I'm not and at one stage he said oh so I hear you like hip-hop and began rapping some yo yo yo type thing in my face with arm gestures included for good measure. I wish I was lying, I sincerely do.

It's looking more and more to me like your friend secretly hates you. Though I may be channeling my own resentment here because I used to play WoW on and off myself.

Zed Bank

So I was texting this wan on Facebook, she looked like a real cracker and we seemed to be getting on really well, her personality was kinda like the relationship you have with your friends when you were 15, just with tits.
It was all going well until I got word of a couple of mates I had at the time that she Was a complete dog. So I preceded to ignore her until she somehow tracked me down, the best way I can describe her is that she looked like Ibrahimovic. The proceding date was uncomfortable to say the least. Photos can be deceiving!

Paddy Fields

Spent the first 4 years of my life in the north inner city then after my divorce I was living in a nice area of south Dublin with the glorious title of IT consultant, driving a BMW. Went on an Internet date with a "Team leader" from Bank of Ireland and she went on all night about her job like the fukken country would fall apart without her. I must have at some stage mentioned my early life in a tenement house in Summerhill as on Monday I sent her a "so how was it for you" text and she said, "check your email."

Well I did and there was some load of old mother Hubbard about how her kind and my kind just couldn't get on and she could never introduce "someone like me" to her family. WTF? I felt like a person of some other ethnic persuasion that just arrived on a small boat at Dublin port (not €10 Stena line deal). I was 4 and it was Summerhill for f**k sake!

Chrisita

Incredible, I am almost speechless. Was this in recent times?

blacklilly

darkpagandeath wrote: »

You can burn things down without fire what sorcery is this

Yes, the "fire stare" can do just as much damage as fire but there's no smoke.

canadianwoman

I once went out on a date with a guy I met through an online dating website. We seemed to get along conversationally online but when we finally met up in person he was not very talkative. He pretty much sat through the entire date barely saying a word and mostly gazing out the window while I TRIED to engage him in some kind of a conversation.

Later that evening he emailed me asking for a second date because he had such a great time at our first one. Grrrrrrrrr. :mad:

There was no second date.