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Disabled people's toilets: secret pleasure.

  • 27-09-2013 3:07pm
    #1
    Cody Pomeray
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,648 ✭✭✭


    Before I start, I'll say that six months ago I suffered some bad injuries to a leg, shoulder joint and collar bone, and I could not have been criticized for using the disabled people's toilet at work.

    But when my injuries began to heal, I'd still limp off in the direction of the disability toilet, moaning and nursing my shoulder for emphasis, and continued to do so until this day.

    It's just so nice and roomy in there. It's right by the cleaners' closet, so they always keep it scrubbed, and stocked up with soap and towels. You can stretch out your legs and never endure those horrible moments when you hear your colleagues churning out their bowels before lunch.

    But this morning it all changed. I strolled out of the disability toilet, newspaper in hand, whistling contentedly, when STANDING outside, waiting crossly, was an elderly lady and her young disabled companion on crutches. My first instinct was to affect some terrible coughing episode, or a sudden limp, but no! She already knew my game.

    I wanted the earth to open and swallow me. I had just spent the best part of 20 minutes doing the Metro sudoku and grooming my hair while this lady badly needed a whizz.

    So should I give up using the toilet? Are you yourself a secret admirer of the grandeur of the modern disability toilet?


Comments

  • #2
    Frosty McSnowballs
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,396 ✭✭✭Frosty McSnowballs


    Only for sex


  • #3
    biko
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 81,220 ✭✭✭✭biko


    It's the same as parking in a disabled spot, and leaving a poo in it.


  • #4
    petes
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,382 ✭✭✭petes


    Ironically there is more room to run about in a disabled toilet!


  • #5
    The Backwards Man
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    petes wrote: »
    Ironically there is more room to run about in a disabled toilet!
    What way do you poo?


  • #6
    mattjack
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    Why not see if you can get hold of a wheelchair for yourself , maybe hang around nursing homes or the local hospital and grab one.


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  • #7
    hansfrei
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 915 ✭✭✭hansfrei


    20 minutes in the loo. Definately ****.


  • #8
    petes
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,382 ✭✭✭petes


    The Backwards Man wrote: »
    What way do you poo?

    I take a run up. Is that not how everyone does it??


  • #9
    hatrickpatrick
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,797 ✭✭✭✭hatrickpatrick


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDZzl9AyXeg


  • #10
    WilyCoyote
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,059 ✭✭✭WilyCoyote


    The Backwards Man wrote: »
    What way do you poo?

    Scrawled on a disabled cubicle in The House Of Commons:

    Said the Duchess of Chester at tea,
    "Young man, do you fart when you pee?"
    I replied with some wit,
    "Do you belch when you ****?"
    I think that was one up to me.


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