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Childhood Rules

  • 14-09-2013 08:30PM
    #1
    Posts: 3,126 ✭✭✭


    Childhood was a time of much complex rules and regulations to keep order. What childhood rules do you remember?

    One I recall was the next goal wins when playing soccer.

    No matter the score, after sometimes hours of playing, the next goal wins.


«13

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,664 ✭✭✭Doyler92


    The fat kid was always the goalkeeper.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,407 ✭✭✭lkionm


    Never tell mommy what me and uncle did


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 73,608 ✭✭✭✭L1011


    Doyler92 wrote: »
    The fat kid was always the goalkeeper.

    That explains a lot about my goalkeeping career :(


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,664 ✭✭✭Doyler92


    MYOB wrote: »
    That explains a lot about my goalkeeping career :(

    I'm sorry that this is the way you had to find out.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,396 ✭✭✭Frosty McSnowballs


    No matter what you did, you were gay.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,753 ✭✭✭Vito Corleone


    When playing football, instead of the offside rule there was "no goal hanging". One of the worst things was if you got a reputation for being a "goal hanger".


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,396 ✭✭✭Frosty McSnowballs


    When playing football, instead of the offside rule there was "no goal hanging". One of the worst things was if you got a reputation for being a "goal hanger".

    We called that "lodging"

    Oh, and no toe bogging the ball!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,133 ✭✭✭FloatingVoter


    Goal doesn't count 'cos- "you toed the ball"....

    Damn ****ing right I did - thats why you were on your arse at the back of the net holding the ball lookin' like an eejit.

    And I fell for it. There endeth my career in penalty taking.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,091 ✭✭✭Antar Bolaeisk


    I before E except after C.

    At no stage have I ever used it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,512 ✭✭✭Muise...


    3 SECONDS!

    (yummy)


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,133 ✭✭✭FloatingVoter


    I before E except after C.

    At no stage have I ever used it.

    But sir, sir ...wha' abou' de CIE ?

    Outside the door, now.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 215 ✭✭Walshey96


    Whoever owned the football decided who played and decided the game was over when they had to go in :)


  • Posts: 3,126 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    No matter what you did, you were gay.

    Ha, that's right!

    One had to tread a very fine line to avoid the gay label.

    Once it was decided somebody was gay, they were shunned by the general population.


  • Posts: 2,032 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Tax!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,925 ✭✭✭✭anncoates


    No hatching - especially if there was a fly goalie.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 901 ✭✭✭Vicar in a tutu


    The last person to touch the little yellow H sign (Hydrant) was a homosexual.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,925 ✭✭✭✭anncoates


    No matter what you did, you were gay.


    I was brought up in the 80s.

    Gay had not been invented in Ireland then.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,052 ✭✭✭u_c_thesecond


    dont be a "rat"

    even if u were frigid you had to play kiss chase (ha)

    if the owner of the garden didnt like you ya wernt allowed in you had to stay outside while being taunted over it


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,512 ✭✭✭Muise...


    anncoates wrote: »
    I was brought up in the 80s.

    Gay had not been invented in Ireland then.

    oh, but virgins had.

    "Are you a virgin?"
    "em, no." [no clue what the word means]
    "YOU'RE A HOOR!" [runs around playground singing "Muise's a hoor!"

    ah, the days.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 16,096 ✭✭✭✭the groutch


    We called that "lodging"

    I used to call it Robbie Fowler-ing


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 16,701 ✭✭✭✭Tigger


    last man back
    also homo on the loose


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,299 ✭✭✭✭MadsL


    People and objects could be infected with a thing called "the mang". It was your duty on discovering a person or object with "the mang" to inform anyone withing earshot of that fact. Anyone subsequently touching said person or object now also had "the mang" and a similar announcement was required.

    There was no cure.

    I lost many classmates to "the mang" *sniff*


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,180 ✭✭✭Sunglasses Ron


    cisk wrote: »
    Tax!

    I'm not sure if we are on the same wavelength but for some reason we used to say "aaah, taxi" to announce one had taken a good fart.

    Every street or estate had one house occupied by an old man or woman with a reputation for killing, or eating, or whatever kids. My locale did, my cousins street did, every far away place you visited and played with the locals in did. Today I kind of feel sorry for any lonely old ****er who earns this rep in all truth.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,779 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    Apparently, having a girlfriend at the age of nine made me gay. (Child logic)

    PS - despite the login, I'm not, repeat not a homosexual. I may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but I am *not* a porn star.

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,822 ✭✭✭Mickey H


    Muise... wrote: »
    3 SECONDS!

    (yummy)

    What? :confused:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,779 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    Mickey H wrote: »
    What? :confused:

    Three secodn rule. If it falls on the floor and the cat is more than three seconds away, it's yours.

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 901 ✭✭✭Vicar in a tutu


    Three secodn rule. If it falls on the floor and the cat is more than three seconds away, it's yours.


    FIVE second rule...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 36,926 ✭✭✭✭o1s1n
    Master of the Universe


    Any white stains were automatically 'Jip'. God help you if you had any kind of stain on your clothes, you'd be 'jip stain!' for the next week.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 901 ✭✭✭Vicar in a tutu


    o1s1n wrote: »
    Any white stains were automatically 'Jip'. God help you if you had any kind of stain on your clothes, you'd be 'jip stain!' for the next week.



    Oh my god I haven't heard the word jip for years! it was always the slightly older bold boys that knew what it was!


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,656 ✭✭✭C14N


    Front-seat-back-seat, which in retrospect was a horrible rule. Basically, when standing in a line, it was always acceptable to let someone skip ahead of you. The rule meant that you agreed to let the person skip ahead of you on the condition that you could then skip ahead of them so the end result was "you can stand behind me in the line" which screwed over everyone else who was further behind.

    Another one: Fake punch, followed by "two for flinching".


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