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What Compliment Is Too Much For Someone in a Relationship to Say?

  • 12-09-2013 8:57pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 90 ✭✭


    You meet someone that you fancy at a pub/club/bingo hall. They're lovely. After a bit of chat/banter/flirting they pay you a huge compliment. Later on you find out that they're in a relationship and think that the compliment they gave you was over the line for someone in a relationship to say to a stranger.

    What was the compliment?


    Personally I think complimenting someone's physical appearance with words stronger than 'nice' or 'lovely' (such as gorgeous, beautiful, etc) is a bit much in this situation. Commenting on their personality is sort-of okay, as long as it's not something like "you're the kindest, most generous person with the best sense of humour that I've ever met, and I've only known you ten minutes." That's creepy. I was just wondering where others think the line should be drawn.


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,238 ✭✭✭Prodgey


    If she's beautiful, there's no harm in telling her.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,518 ✭✭✭stefan idiot jones


    I would kill your Mother just to spend another days in your arms dear.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,534 ✭✭✭SV


    Prodgey wrote: »
    If she's beautiful, there's no harm in telling her.
    If you're in a relationship then yeah, there is imo.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    I love you OP. You complete me.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,339 ✭✭✭Artful_Badger


    Prodgey wrote: »
    If she's beautiful, there's no harm in telling her.

    Only one reason to tell a girl you just met she's beautiful though and if you're in a relationship you shouldn't be openly telling other women you want to ride them.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,147 ✭✭✭PizzamanIRL


    The peach fuzz on your ear lobes turns me on.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 46,938 ✭✭✭✭Nodin


    jessiblah wrote: »
    You meet someone that you fancy at a pub/club/bingo hall. They're lovely. After a bit of chat/banter/flirting they pay you a huge compliment. Later on you find out that they're in a relationship and think that the compliment they gave you was over the line for someone in a relationship to say to a stranger.

    What was the compliment?


    Personally I think complimenting someone's physical appearance with words stronger than 'nice' or 'lovely' (such as gorgeous, beautiful, etc) is a bit much in this situation. Commenting on their personality is sort-of okay, as long as it's not something like "you're the kindest, most generous person with the best sense of humour that I've ever met, and I've only known you ten minutes." That's creepy. I was just wondering where others think the line should be drawn.

    'I'll wash and tumble dry your underwear in my mouth.'


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 346 ✭✭dorkacle


    I think it really depends on the way something is said and the context.

    Like, if its just a 'ah your gorgeous' I don't think it means anything tbh... on the other hand it could be said very provocatively, really depends in how it is said.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,166 ✭✭✭Fr_Dougal


    You don't sweat much for a fat chick.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,390 ✭✭✭IM0


    relationships are tomporary, were always on the lookout for something better whether we realise it or not


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,534 ✭✭✭SV


    IM0 wrote: »
    relationships are tomporary, were always on the lookout for something better whether we realise it or not

    I like how you add 'whether we realise it or not' at the end there. Makes it impossible to argue against you even though it's not true at all.

    btw my Granny and Grandad were each others first partners and were with each other from the age of 14 until he died at the age of 86.
    Fúck all temporary about that.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    "I'd ride you like I stole you"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,390 ✭✭✭IM0


    SV wrote: »
    I like how you add 'whether we realise it or not' at the end there. Makes it impossible to argue against you even though it's not true at all.

    btw my Granny and Grandad were each others first partners and were with each other from the age of 14 until he died at the age of 86.
    Fúck all temporary about that.

    divorce rate is currently running @25% or 50%, granted I cant remember which but either one is pretty shocking


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,308 ✭✭✭downonthefarm


    in the words of a philip mcgraw,if you wouldnt say it when their partner was there you probably shouldnt say it at all


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    Unbelievable what some men will say to you. Even when you are friends with their wife. They want 'a bit of fun' even though they are 'happily married'. And when I remind them I'm married myself they still try. Obviously not all married men/men in relationships are like this but I've met plenty.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,967 ✭✭✭✭28064212


    IM0 wrote: »
    divorce rate is currently running @25% or 50%, granted I cant remember which but either one is pretty shocking
    No, it's not. Not by any measure. Why do people just make stats up on the spot when a 10 second google will give you the actual answer?

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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,901 ✭✭✭Howard Juneau


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Unbelievable what some men will say to you. Even when you are friends with their wife. They want 'a bit of fun' even though they are 'happily married'. And when I remind them I'm married myself they still try. Obviously not all married men/men in relationships are like this but I've met plenty.

    I've met plenty of women like that too.....being this beautiful is a curse is it not?!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    I've met plenty of women like that too.....being this beautiful is a curse is it not?!

    Yeah it's tough alright :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 109 ✭✭Skybox


    I don't see what the issue is here tbh!! You have no idea what the other person's relationship is like. As one poster pointed out, if they wouldn't say it in front of their partner, they shouldn't say it. However you don't know what they would or wouldn't say!! Myself and my girlfriend have a fantastic relationship but I would also be honest enough to say, Wow so and so looks amazing. We were on holidays recently admiring topless women around the pool and commenting on who looked better! I would have no issue paying someone a compliment whether my partner was there or not! Just take the compliment and say thanks!!! :-)


  • Site Banned Posts: 9 Orangebags


    SV wrote: »
    I like how you add 'whether we realise it or not' at the end there. Makes it impossible to argue against you even though it's not true at all.

    btw my Granny and Grandad were each others first partners and were with each other from the age of 14 until he died at the age of 86.
    Fúck all temporary about that.

    Little do you know about all the affairs they had.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,061 ✭✭✭keith16


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Unbelievable what some men will say to you. Even when you are friends with their wife. They want 'a bit of fun' even though they are 'happily married'. And when I remind them I'm married myself they still try. Obviously not all married men/men in relationships are like this but I've met plenty.

    You look great stepping out of the shower.

    Kind regards,
    Kid next door


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,488 ✭✭✭✭Ush1


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Unbelievable what some men will say to you. Even when you are friends with their wife. They want 'a bit of fun' even though they are 'happily married'. And when I remind them I'm married myself they still try. Obviously not all married men/men in relationships are like this but I've met plenty.

    Sam Brick, that you?


  • Site Banned Posts: 9 Orangebags


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Unbelievable what some men will say to you. Even when you are friends with their wife. They want 'a bit of fun' even though they are 'happily married'. And when I remind them I'm married myself they still try. Obviously not all married men/men in relationships are like this but I've met plenty.

    That's what happens when you force a species not meant for monogomy into a monogomous culture.

    Imagine it was decided in our culture that eating food was immoral. People would still so it because sooner than later their instincts would become too powerful too ignore.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,396 ✭✭✭Frosty McSnowballs


    "I'd say you taste great"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,828 ✭✭✭gosplan


    Orangebags wrote: »
    That's what happens when you force a species not meant for monogomy into a monogomous culture.

    Imagine it was decided in our culture that eating food was immoral. People would still so it because sooner than later their instincts would become too powerful too ignore.


    Complete load of rubbish. You may as well say we weren't built for farming, but rather as hunter gatherers.

    If you're sitting out climbing around trees with fcuk all to do all day but eat bamamas and shag, monogomy makes little sense.

    In today's world where raising your own family is such a lengthy undertaking, and especially nowadays when building a home is so often a joint venture, monogomy makes lots of sense and comes naturally enough.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,076 ✭✭✭✭Czarcasm


    Orangebags wrote: »
    Little do you know about all the affairs they had.


    Said with such authority as if you yourself are any the wiser! :pac:

    Orangebags wrote: »
    That's what happens when you force a species not meant for monogomy into a monogomous culture.


    And who forced anybody to accept monogamy? Let alone forced them into a relationship? People have the freedom of choice, but those same people must realise that everyone else has freedom of choice too, and they can choose not to be in a polygamous or polylandrous relationship too if they want to.

    To answer the OP, for me personally there are no limits, but that'll depend on context. People are free to say what they want, it's their actions I'd be judging, not so much their words.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,534 ✭✭✭SV


    Orangebags wrote: »
    That's what happens when you force a species not meant for monogomy into a monogomous culture.

    Imagine it was decided in our culture that eating food was immoral. People would still so it because sooner than later their instincts would become too powerful too ignore.

    Manwhores and Sluts are always breaking this line out.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,769 ✭✭✭✭Mr. CooL ICE


    I once told a girl "your pants are too big. you look a disgrace". She had lost a lot of weight and was looking extremely healthy, but I couldn't bring myself to make a compliment


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,901 ✭✭✭Howard Juneau


    I once told a girl "your pants are too big. you look a disgrace". She had lost a lot of weight and was looking extremely healthy, but I couldn't bring myself to make a compliment

    Only right, keep her on her toes & she'll lose a bit more chunkyness. You have a career as a motivational speaker ahead of you sir!


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,020 ✭✭✭uch


    That was lovely but don't suck so hard please

    21/25



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,822 ✭✭✭Mickey H


    uch wrote: »
    That was lovely but don't suck bite so hard please

    There. FYP. ;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 252 ✭✭Gin77


    Nice shoes, women like shoes.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,299 ✭✭✭✭MadsL


    Sound like the OP is settling an argument? Or starting one?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 546 ✭✭✭kfk


    jessiblah wrote: »
    You meet someone that you fancy at a pub/club/bingo hall. They're lovely. After a bit of chat/banter/flirting they pay you a huge compliment. Later on you find out that they're in a relationship and think that the compliment they gave you was over the line for someone in a relationship to say to a stranger.

    What was the compliment?


    Personally I think complimenting someone's physical appearance with words stronger than 'nice' or 'lovely' (such as gorgeous, beautiful, etc) is a bit much in this situation. Commenting on their personality is sort-of okay, as long as it's not something like "you're the kindest, most generous person with the best sense of humour that I've ever met, and I've only known you ten minutes." That's creepy. I was just wondering where others think the line should be drawn.

    You may want to rethink that! Last night I complimented my wifes best friend with "You've got really nice baby feeders". My wife and her friend went nuts! I think I should have just said "nice" instead of "really nice".


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,925 ✭✭✭✭anncoates


    jessiblah wrote: »
    You meet someone that you fancy at a pub/club/bingo hall

    "It's so nice to meet a woman that still has all her teeth".


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,812 ✭✭✭✭sbsquarepants


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Unbelievable what some men will say to you. Even when you are friends with their wife. They want 'a bit of fun' even though they are 'happily married'. And when I remind them I'm married myself they still try. Obviously not all married men/men in relationships are like this but I've met plenty.


    NEWSFLASH - lukesmom is a milf eh, I mean yummy mummy:D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,045 ✭✭✭✭gramar


    If it's along the lines of you 'have a lovely cock' or ' a sweet fanny' then things have probably gone to far.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,875 ✭✭✭✭MugMugs


    I always find this works well.

    "You're nice............ Nice and fat....."


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    The only compliment that'd be over the line, is if they were to start ridin' me.

    Which being honest, I'd take as quite the compliment.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,754 ✭✭✭Itwasntme.


    Gin77 wrote: »
    Nice shoes, women like shoes.

    I see what you didn't do there :).


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  • Site Banned Posts: 63 ✭✭Carrie Madshaw


    kfk wrote: »
    You may want to rethink that! Last night I complimented my wifes best friend with "You've got really nice baby feeders". My wife and her friend went nuts! I think I should have just said "nice" instead of "really nice".

    Or milkers instead of baby feeders..


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 90 ✭✭jessiblah


    MadsL wrote: »
    Sound like the OP is settling an argument? Or starting one?

    Neither actually. I was just curious what other people would deem as too much.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,126 ✭✭✭KwackerJack


    Say absolutely nothing, because the next time she's asks it will be the wrong answer!

    Am I fat.....

    No Darling....

    Your lying so you don't hurt my feelings......

    Ok your fat.....

    Your only a prick, is that why you look at at the skinny bitches :rolleyes:


    Does my ass look big in this........

    No hunny.....

    Yes! yes it does it's huge......

    Well if it's so big why ask for a second opinion!


    You see the best thing to do is just say ' you look great, if you feel comfortable, wear it'

    After that your losing an already defeated battle!


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