not wanting a bf in my 30's....normal rite??

Sandypants

So im in my early 30's which seems to be the age family/friends seem to get on ur case bout settling down... My problem is ive no interest...just cause the girls i use to go out drinking with r all getting married an having babies they think i should be doing the same...but i was nvr desperate like them in wanting to get a man. Ive nvr really liked the term "boyfriend" an i hate the idea of going on dates...& no i dont hate men yes ive had my fair share of nob-ends but the decent blokes ive met out way the bad ones! I just get less out out of a relationship then the blokes.... So my point is...it is normal not to need a man in my 30's...rite??

Stavro Mueller

Does it matter whether its normal or not? If you don't want a boyfriend and are happy with the way things are, I fail to see the problem.

The_Conductor

The reason a lot of women decide to settle down in their 20s and 30s- is simple genetics. If you want to have children at some stage- it becomes more and more difficult the older you get- its a simple fact.

If you're happy being on your own- and don't want to settle down- more power to you. If you feel that you'd like children at some stage- it really is time to get your act together, children are best brought up in a stable relationship. Yes, we all hear stories of Mums (and some Dads) doing remarkable jobs on their own- but they are more the exceptions than the rule.

If you're happy- and have no intention of having children- make the most of your freedom, have fun, enjoy yourself. If you want children at some stage- it is something that you're going to have to sit down and evaluate for yourself.

Taltos

OP - Welcome to PI, per our charter text speak is not allowed here.
Please don't continue to post in this manner or the thread will be closed. This might seem harsh but text speak means you will get less responses and to be honest we all find it painful to read.

Thanks
Taltos

ABajaninCork

Entirely normal. I was single from 28 until the age of 32. Never bothered me in the slightest. You work to your OWN timetable - not everyone else's!!

LegacyUser

I know that some woman think you are nothing unless you have a boyfriend/husband.
They seem to think that you must be very unhappy as your not part of a couple or having children.

If you are happy being single why should change your life to suit other people.

The one thing I would say to you is that if you want to have a family your better off in a long term stable relationship.
I know several woman who had children on there own and they have found it hard.

Sandypants

Thanks for the answers though i do have to say i know plenty of single mothers who do a fantastic job and their kids see there dads more then those in a "stable relastionship".

DoozerT6

OP, as mentioned above, think seriously about whether you want kids or not. If you do, maybe you should think a bit more about actively looking for Mr Right before it's too late.

Personally I wouldn't choose to be a single mother. I'm 38 and haven't met Mr Right, and have been trying to come to terms with possibly never having children, having never been sure I would ever have them, as I had never been on more than first-name terms with any man. There's nothing to stop me going out and buying sperm and doing it myself, but that's not for me personally.

ShowMeTheCash

What I find weird about your post is that you seem to want to justify something about yourself... you mention that you are not "desperate like some of your mates" to get a man...

Do what makes you happy, there is no norm but perhaps be a little less judgmental to people who do things differently than you...

sunflower27 mentioned:
"I have found happiness doing as I want, not following what society expects or deems normal for me to do."

Society does not care what you do be assured of that, your friends and family however I would imagine do care.

The idea that we are sinlge because we want to be single I think is nonsene, I peddled that line for years until I met someone that changed my mind!

I think our friends and family push the "you not settling down" line because they do not want us to end up on our own....

Untimately the older we get the number of single people being to shrink people pair off so by the time you hit your 40s you might find that most of your friends are now married with kids or the single ones come with baggage or are single for a reason...

Every situation is different, do you think you are single cause you want to be single or are you single because you feel you have not met anyone that would make you want to be in a relationship?