Jokes by stand-up comedians that have been done to death

Welsh Megaman

Heard a stand-up comedian on the radio the other day (didn't catch his name) who 'dissected' the song 'Ironic' by Alanis Morrisette as part of his routine - noting that the things she mentions aren't actually ironic, the punchline being the fact a song called 'Ironic' with non-ironic situations is in itself ironic.

:rolleyes: I rolled my eyes back so far, I snapped my optic nerves. Practically every comedian, from Sean Hughes to Ed Byrne to Abie Philip Bowman to Jo Brand, has talked about 'Ironic' in their routine, to the point where it is no longer funny.

Also jokes about 'Bully's Special Prize' in 'Bullseye' always being a speedboat.

Done. To. Death.

So boardsies, what topics have comedians told waaaaaay too many times, and should never be discussed again?

fryup

Billy Connolly and the prostate gag, funny first time but now..nah

ArnoldJRimmer

Bono: 'Every time I click my fingers, a child in Africa dies'
Person in crowd: 'well stop doing it then'

matt-dublin

Your ma's been done to death by stand ups

The Backwards Man

Two men walk into a bar.

You'd think one of them would have seen it.

SV

No joke has been done to death imo, the delivery of a joke is the most important part.

AnonoBoy

Jokes about optic nerves snapping.

Sub-McIntrye stuff really.

Bipolar Joe

Routines about the Iraq War and George Bush. I'm amazed, this far on, it still happens. Women joking about their children and how their husbands can't do a something. Get a new schtick, you lazy assholes. Tommy Tiernan doing pretty much anything, and that annoying idiot that does the hilarious impressions.

Panthro

Des Bishop and his "Did you remember to turn off the Immersion?" routine.

Aquagakka

Air travel.

Allyall

Ed Byrne appearing on Quiz/Panel shows.

Done to Death after the first time.

The Superman/Drugs Joke. - "Its not the drugs, it's the idiots. If they thought they could fly, why not take off from the ground?"

In fairness, I have only ever seen a couple of unknowns repeat it on Mr. Hicks, (One on that cráp Sky One 'Comedy' show), One on Channel 4 - Possibly the same guy and i didn't recognise him.
And a guy in Cork at some show.

But it should never be repeated by a professional anyway.

Karl Stein

Where's me washboard, eh?

Allyall

Oh oh oh!!

Anyone that does an impression of somebody from the Country, and makes him a dirty old man, or her unwashed..

Jaysis.. If anything has been done to death and dug up and done to death again, it's that.

Timmyctc

Female comedians doing routines about basically how they are women. Jo-Brand and her routines about being a fat woman. Oh. The comedians from Africa or Asia who base their routines on as much.

keith16

What's the deal with airplane food?

Sir Osis of Liver.

Brendan Grace hasnt changed his routine since the early eighties.(Bottler,Drunken father of the bride,priest,etc.)

Although he was funny in Fr.Ted in fairness.

Andersonisgod

keith16 wrote: »

What's the deal with airplane food?

Ye I know, but seriously, what is the deal with airline food?

Sir Osis of Liver.

"Snakes on a Plane,
I wonder what thats about?"

keith16

Andersonisgod wrote: »

Ye I know, but seriously, what is the deal with airline food?

I can never open the packet of peanuts. And those little trays they give you?

Smeggy

Karl Spain..

I'm fat because every time I rode your mother she gave me a biscuit....
I've been single now for about four stone....

lkionm

Smeggy wrote: »

Karl Spain..

I'm fat because every time I rode your mother she gave me a biscuit....
I've been single now for about four stone....

He is a regular where I work and got his coffee and asked;

'You know the way you have whole milk and skinny milk there'
'Yeah?'
'Is the whole milk from a hole in the ground'


We then joked about customers being spastics, he was leaving and he came over to me and said he only realised I called him a spastic when he sat down.


Nice enough guy apart from that really bad joke.

Sir Osis of Liver.

lkionm wrote: »

He is a regular where I work and got his coffee and asked;

'You know the way you have whole milk and skinny milk there'
'Yeah?'
'Is the whole milk from a hole in the ground'


We then joked about customers being spastics, he was leaving and he came over to me and said he only realised I called him a spastic when he sat down.


Nice enough guy apart from that really bad joke.

He sounds like he could do with a punch in the face.

frag420

Take my wife for example!!

No seriously, take her!!

Nelson Mandela

Don't you hate pants...?

AnonoBoy

Timmyctc wrote: »

Oh. The comedians from Africa or Asia who base their routines on as much.

As opposed to all the Irish comedians who base their comedy around being from Ireland?

"IT'S MAD CAUSE IT'S IN IRELAND!!! WE'RE IRISH, SURE WE'RE MAD. THEY DON'T DO MAD THINGS LIKE US IN EUROPE, BUT WE DO CAUSE WE'RE MAD, CAUSE WE'RE IRISH!" etc. etc.

lkionm

Sir Osis of Liver. wrote: »

He sounds like he could do with a punch in the face.

I told him he shouldn't quit the day job due to his bad milk joke.


If I am ever at his gig and he uses that joke I will run down and shove a steam arm up his nose and lobotomise him.

gobnaitolunacy

Sir Osis of Liver. wrote: »

Brendan Grace hasnt changed his routine since the early eighties.(Bottler,Drunken father of the bride,priest,etc.)

Although he was funny in Fr.Ted in fairness.

Why should he?
His core audience are senior citizens who don't like change.

Chabals Beard

Brendan Grace does not know the meaning of "new material"

efb

Panthro wrote: »

Des Bishop and his "Did you remember to turn off the Immersion?" routine.

Anyone and that rucking immersion gag.

efb

gobnaitolunacy wrote: »

Why should he?
His core audience are senior citizens who don't like change.

God bless alzheimer's

knucklehead6

The one that EVERY Irish comedian was doing during the Foot & Mouth crisis a few years back.

They'd start off into a rant about drugs getting into the country and guns getting into the country and illegal immigrants getting into the country and how nothing could be done about closing the border or monitoring the coastline or watching at the airports...

1 f*cking lamb gets an itchy hoof and BOOM the entire country closes borders and everything else.