Can't stand people my age

LegacyUser

However ridiculous it sounds, I genuinely can't stand people my age...

I used to laugh off my parents' stories of a five or six year old me who would refuse to talk to classmates at birthday parties and only talk to parents, but recently I've noticed this trend becoming more and more prevalent.

However over the years this trait has established itself more and more; now I'm 18 and I genuinely can't make conversation with people my age. All my peers do is talk about school/college etc. and I just feel like I can't relate to anything they say which is making me seem distant from them.

Any long term relationships I've been in involved guys who were on average 6-10 years older than me and though a lot of my friends found this really weird, it really wasn't for me & made me think are age differences such a major thing now?

My current boyfriend is 10 years older than me and my friends have now managed to make me feel worried about telling my parents when I initially did not.

Daisy M

You know your parents a lot better than your friends so, so if your initial reaction was that they would be ok with this then you are probably right. But whether or not they have an issue is not your concern you are old enough to know who you want to go out with. If you are drawn to older people you maybe a little more mature than your peers this is something I am sure your parents are already aware of. Take no notice of your friends most 18 yr olds think anyone over 21 is ancient.:)

judgefudge

Is it actually an issue or are you happy enough like that? There's nothing wrong with just getting along better with people older than you, as far as I can see.

herisson

OP, there isnt anything wrong with it You just get along with people older than you.

It's ok not to like people your own age, im like that too.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Olderfolk wrote: »

However ridiculous it sounds, I genuinely can't stand people my age...

I used to laugh off my parents' stories of a five or six year old me who would refuse to talk to classmates at birthday parties and only talk to parents, but recently I've noticed this trend becoming more and more prevalent.

However over the years this trait has established itself more and more; now I'm 18 and I genuinely can't make conversation with people my age. All my peers do is talk about school/college etc. and I just feel like I can't relate to anything they say which is making me seem distant from them.

Any long term relationships I've been in involved guys who were on average 6-10 years older than me and though a lot of my friends found this really weird, it really wasn't for me & made me think are age differences such a major thing now?

My current boyfriend is 10 years older than me and my friends have now managed to make me feel worried about telling my parents when I initially did not.

Sounds like it's all in your head. Having a bf/gf ten years older than you is not unusual and certainly not something to be conscious about. As for age ranges? Well, age is just a number and that doesn't just apply to relationships.

be with the prople you find interesting. Don;t worry about whether or not they're in the same age range as you or not.

LegacyUser

Thanks everyone! You've basically echoed my gut feeling - I guess it was just a few snarky comments from "friends" that were making me doubt myself! As long as we're happy, sure whatever about the age difference!

denhaagenite

Olderfolk wrote: »

Any long term relationships I've been in involved guys who were on average 6-10 years older than me and though a lot of my friends found this really weird, it really wasn't for me & made me think are age differences such a major thing now?

Sorry, you're 18 and anyone you've been in a relationship with has been 6 - 10 years older than you? I think there's something extremely wrong with that.

I suspect that your issues may come from spending alot of time with adults as a child. I'm sure you haven't met all people your age, but do think that you may have a closed mind when it comes to communicating with them. In fact your whole post sounded a bit conceited. Having an attitude of "My mammy says I'm more mature than everyone else" doesn't, in reality, come across as very mature.

Have you ever been in school or college? If yes then why would you have an issue talking about it? Give them and yourself a chance and forget about maturity for a minute. You might find it a bit easier to make connections.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

denhaagenite wrote: »

Sorry, you're 18 and anyone you've been in a relationship with has been 6 - 10 years older than you? I think there's something extremely wrong with that.

I suspect that your issues may come from spending alot of time with adults as a child. I'm sure you haven't met all people your age, but do think that you may have a closed mind when it comes to communicating with them. In fact your whole post sounded a bit conceited. Having an attitude of "My mammy says I'm more mature than everyone else" doesn't, in reality, come across as very mature.

Have you ever been in school or college? If yes then why would you have an issue talking about it? Give them and yourself a chance and forget about maturity for a minute. You might find it a bit easier to make connections.

At the risk of going off thread, how do you manage to make that assumption...?

The OP has obviously spent a lot of time with people his/her own age and not found them interesting. Why the **** should they put themsleves in unsatisfying environments just because of someone else's imposed social norms?

denhaagenite

Olderfolk wrote: »

I used to laugh off my parents' stories of a five or six year old me who would refuse to talk to classmates at birthday parties and only talk to parents, but recently I've noticed this trend becoming more and more prevalent.

This is where I got it from.

Olderfolk wrote: »

All my peers do is talk about school/college etc. and I just feel like I can't relate to anything they say which is making me seem distant from them.

This is something that needs to be looked at in the context of the OPs issue, as she was in school and may be in college. How can she not relate to a situation that she was in not so long ago and quite possibly is in at the moment?

As I said I would be more concerned with a teenager being involved with someone so much older than them. It could also be adding to the distance she is feeling from her peers. I don't think agreeing with the OP is very helpful, my opinion may differ from hers or others but it could be better to look at the situation from a completely different perspective in order to resolve the issue.

judgefudge

Just to add OP... While there's nothing wrong with getting along with people older than you, I wouldn't disregard people your own age so easily. You seem to have tarred them all with the same brush, and even the thread title "can't stand people my own age" seems quite bitter. Where does that nastiness come from? People are all different at the end of the day. I've got friends my age that are ridiculously immature, and others that have very set life goals and mature tastes. Once you get into your twenties and beyond I don't think age has such an impact on personality type really.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

denhaagenite wrote: »

This is where I got it from.



This is something that needs to be looked at in the context of the OPs issue, as she was in school and may be in college. How can she not relate to a situation that she was in not so long ago and quite possibly is in at the moment?

As I said I would be more concerned with a teenager being involved with someone so much older than them. It could also be adding to the distance she is feeling from her peers. I don't think agreeing with the OP is very helpful, my opinion may differ from hers or others but it could be better to look at the situation from a completely different perspective in order to resolve the issue.

Doesn't answer the question, to be honest - Mammy has not been address at all - but whatever.

Weathering

Ugh. In your own head you probably think you're too mature to associate with them. You're 18 and you said all they talk about is school well they're probably sitting their LC next week go figure. Also I find it disturbing that all your bf's have been 6-10yrs older than u. If you're only 18 now I hate to guess how sick and sad these grown men were to go after a 16yr old etc. Any 28yr old man going out with an 18yr is wrong. He obviously can't get someone around his own age for whatever reason. I'm sure I'll get a few o i was with...bla from other pees. Wake up its weird all those men going after her 6-10yrs older when shes in 2nd school.

denhaagenite

Weathering wrote: »

Also I find it disturbing that all your bf's have been 6-10yrs older than u. If you're only 18 now I hate to guess how sick and sad these grown men were to go after a 16yr old etc. Any 28yr old man going out with an 18yr is wrong. Wake up its weird all those men going after her 6-10yrs older when shes in 2nd school.

Exactly, why is this not setting off alarm bells to anyone else? An age gap is OK but the OP is a very young adult who was a child less than a year ago, going out with people so much older at that age is strange, any younger is creepy and a little younger still is illegal and can only add to alienation from people her own age.

Dark Phoenix

when I was your age most of my friends were in their thirties. My mum used to be freaked out by this altogether. In my twenties one of my closest friends was my friends mum. I just clicked better with people older than me.

Im in my thirties now and have friends who are the same age as me, some younger some older. One of my closest longest friends is in her sixties. I have friends who are seventeen and some who are my age. if you share a common ground why does it matter what age you or they are.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

denhaagenite wrote: »

Exactly, why is this not setting off alarm bells to anyone else? An age gap is OK but the OP is a very young adult who was a child less than a year ago, going out with people so much older at that age is strange, any younger is creepy and a little younger still is illegal and can only add to alienation from people her own age.

Because we're not judgemental. Perhaps people in their late teens are very dull and boring? Whatever the reason, the OP has gravitated towards people she finds interesting.

I'm assuming there's no sexual inclinations in your post. From the OP's, this is her entire social life, not just one encounter. I certainly would not advocate hanging around with people their own age simply because they're the same age.

denhaagenite

Princess Consuela Bananahammock wrote: »

I'm assuming there's no sexual inclinations in your post. From the OP's, this is her entire social life, not just one encounter. I certainly would not advocate hanging around with people their own age simply because they're the same age.

Sorry, have you read the OP at all? She has outlined that at 18, all of her relationships have been with people who were 6 - 10 years older than her.

LegacyUser

Op I can relate to your concerns. I always related better to older acquaintances than those my own age. As you get older you will realise that age is irrevelant when it comes to real friendship. If you find that you cannot relate to your peers then that's just who you are.
A 10 year age gap isn't usually a cause for concern but as you are 18 you'll probably find that some people won't understand it. If your parents already acknowledge how mature you are, as you say, they probably won't question it.

LegacyUser

Just came back to check the thread and it's really interesting to read everyone's responses, but one funny thing I thought I'd address to put ye all at ease is that pretty much all sexual relationships I've been in are with people my own age so don't worry about that kind of thing, I'm not stupid enough to put guys in the position of statutory rape...

And also I don't have a problem with communicating with people my own age, like of course I can chat to them about courses and all that, I was just trying to point out that I prefer talking about/experiencing other things

Taltos

Hi OP

can you please clarify what advice are you looking for here?

Thanks
Taltos