Should I get in touch after so long?

LegacyUser

Hi, just looking for opinions here. Try keep this brief

Met a girl about a month or so ago while on a night out and got her number. Went out 2 weeks ago for drinks and had a great night. Turned out had lots in common and had plenty of banter, was a very enjoyable evening. Anyway, havent seen her since.

At the end of our date, she was gonna get a bus home, so I waited with her. She then asked if she could come home with me and spend the night... but I said no.. Reason being, my housemates had friends over and I had told them they could stay in my room and Id stay at my parents (damn unfortunate timing). I explained all this to her and she said to give her a shout during the week and see if we'd do something the following weekend.

So I text (stupid, 99 times out of 100 I woulda rang, dunno why I texted) and we messaged back and forth til I asked what her plans were for Saturday. She said she was wrecked and wanted a quiet weekend after the 4 day weekend. So I just said "grand, was gonna ask if you wanted to head to town as Ill be there with friends anyway, but we can do something another time". So she said to text her Saturday and see what was happening. When I text her I was at my friends and said we'd be in town around 10, so if she was around then maybe meet up or whatever. She didnt reply til late that evening saying she was down the country and to enjoy my night. At that point I just figured she wasnt interested and since I was with a group of friends and getting ready to head out just replied "Ok, I enjoyed meeting up with you last week, so if youre up for doing something sometime give me a shout, otherwise was nice meeting you!"

Needless to say I didnt hear back from her. Anyway, was discussing this with a friend saying I was disappointed I didnt get to see her again after we both appeared to enjoy our evening out and got on so well. His interpretation of things were (and he definitely wasnt saying this to me in a consoling way :P )

*She enjoyed herself, which is why she wanted to head back to my place
*I likely embarrassed her, or maybe even offended her by refusing (despite explaining why)
*I only asked her out by text 4 days later and only asked her to meet up 'because I was gonna be in town with friends anyway'
*My "nice meeting you otherwise" text probably came across as rude (but I definitely didnt mean it to be), so on the whole I came across as half assed, not bothered and rude
*He also said since I asked her out on a Saturday for drinks again it was likely coz I wanted to get drinks into her and bring her back to mine - dunno about that point

So on the back of that I decided to text her, on the Sunday just gone and see what was what. Anyway, we text back and forth for a while just how our week was and so on and I left it at that and said Id be in touch. Monday evening, I decided to stop being so indecisive and rang, however there was no answer, and I was heading into the gym at the time so said Id just send a text later. Unfortunately I didnt get home til nearly 11, then was working non stop all day Tuesday so never followed up. More to the point, she had the missed call from me, but didnt get in touch either...

So, Im in two minds

*Should I just send her a text saying in hindsight I probably came across as not too bothered and maybe even rude (my friends points above) but was just extremely busy, but if she was up for it Id like to take her out some evening
*Just leave it as is, shes not interested. And besides, it would look way way too eager getting in touch again after the unresponded to phone call, so not worth the hassle

If I was a third party to this Id just say forget it, and if she had any interest in seeing me she wouldve made some more effort on her side. Thing is, I did really enjoy my time with her, and having been out with girls Ive met randomly quite a few times I know how rare it can be to meet someone who you (seemingly) click with, so to be honest, I would like to try one last time and leave it without any lingering thoughts. And dunno if the fact shes being so aloof, but its making me really eager to see her again, never chase women this much, especially ones I just meet randomly on nights out!! But then if shes just uninterested and being polite replying to me I dont wanna make her even more awkward. Both 28 by the way...

Apologies, tried to keep it short... Any perspectives would be welcome, thanks!

kjl

Got about half way though you post. Don't mind your friend. Pick up the phone and call her. Have a general chat and maybe be a bit cheeky about not calling her, then ask her out.

I know it can be nerve wrecking, but if you like her then it's worth it.

Meauldsegosha

You've texted her and phoned her, I'd forget about it at this stage.

MissFlitworth

It can take a *lot* of courage for a girl to make the first 'lets spend the night together' move and she was probably slightly scarlet, no matter how good your reason was. if that was followed up by inviting me out at 10 at night and with your friends followed by that your text, to me, would have come across to me as though you were the one who wasn't interested. 'Nice meeting you!' sounds a little sarcastic in a text, there's a bit of a 'buh bye!' vibe off it. I'd get in touch! Would probably call rather than text though, if you're interested it might be better to have a chat where things can't be misconstrued

(D'oh - I missed the bit where you've called once before. I'd still do it again though. It doesn't sound like she's an asshole, more a case of crossed wires, hurt feelings and slight mortification. What have you got to lose?)

LegacyUser

Hi, OP here.

Thanks for the replies, when I posted the thread I took one look at my post and went "right... nobody will read all that" :P

Anyway, figured I had nothing to lose so I text her earlier, gonna meet Friday! Thanks again