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Forever alone...

  • 21-03-2013 9:19pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hey all,
    I'm a 19 year old girl, coming up on 20.
    I've never been in a relationship and never really been on a date bar one time when I was 17. I've shifted loads of guys when I'm out but it's never gone any further than that. I'm average looking, the problem lies more with my lack of confidence around guys. I went to an all girl's secondary school and now I'm in a college course with a small class of all girls. I have no guy friends, never did past primary school. Talking to a fella makes me really nervous, even if they aren't someone I find attractive. I keep thinking they are looking at me and thinking I'm ugly and I wouldn't go near her kind of thing. Judging me I suppose. So I generally avoid talking to them at all. I know that it's probably all in my head. I don't have any male cousins or anything, so it might sound pathetic, but guys are literally like aliens to me.

    I recently signed up to a dating site because I figured I've nothing to lose, and I've been talking to one guy who's profile attracted my eye. We are friends on Facebook so I know he's an actual real person. We arranged a date, but I chickened out and text him with an excuse. I feel bad for letting him down and for letting myself down. I told him we could arrange for another time and he seemed happy to. I really want to meet him, but I can't bring myself to it!

    I just need some advice on how to deal with my issues with guys, anyone?


Comments

  • #2
    blatantrereg
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,743 ✭✭✭blatantrereg


    Don't build it up so much in your head. All you're talking about doing is meeting someone for a cup of coffee (or whatever). You might hit it off, you might not. No big deal.


  • #3
    boo-yaw-ka-shaa
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 54 ✭✭boo-yaw-ka-shaa


    hey OP, I think you just need to put yourself out there and get more experience talking to guys. Have you ever thought of joining a club, volunteering with an organisation or anything that might put you out of your comfort zone of female friends and force you to talk to guys without the pressure of it being a date situation and pub/drinking situation. Just an idea!


  • #4
    EdenHazard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,296 ✭✭✭EdenHazard


    Take it easy. No joke but guys kinda see themselves in the non dominant position when it comes to girls. Really the ball is in your court, I don't know why but unless your famous it appears this is how it is. Don't be beaten by your insecurities :) PM me if u need advice on anything.


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