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Sexism you have personally experienced or have heard of? *READ POST 1*

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  • Registered Users Posts: 16,381 ✭✭✭✭Galwayguy35


    You should have told the bouncers about her behaviour and had her ejected.

    It would have been a waste of time, I had a drink i had just bought stolen from me by a girl and when I went after her to get it back first of all I had 4 lads ready to batter me 6 ways from sunday and when the bouncers came they just didn't want to know.
    I was told to leave quietly or else I would be going out the hard way.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 35 menapyan


    It would have been a waste of time, I had a drink i had just bought stolen from me by a girl and when I went after her to get it back first of all I had 4 lads ready to batter me 6 ways from sunday and when the bouncers came they just didn't want to know.
    I was told to leave quietly or else I would be going out the hard way.
    was in a club recently and saw some woman being manhandled out the exit by the bouncers, it was a fine sight to see.


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,170 ✭✭✭Wompa1


    I got my junk grabbed in the line for a nightclub in plain view of the bouncers. Apparently it was a laughing matter.

    I worked in a place in which there was heavy boxes up on a canopy, only men were asked to go up and take them down.

    Any clogged toilet was there for a guy to unclog, never a girl.

    When going to school, only the guys got the sh!t kicked out of them by the principal.

    When in secondary school, I was doing Home Economics (forced to do it by the school!!) I had no real interest, didn't enjoy cooking. We had to pick a dish to prepare for our Junior Cert exam out of a hat. I picked the easiest one which was Fruit Salad. The female teacher took it off me and told me that men do not have a sense of decoration and made me pick again....I got Salmon for the next one...I hate fish. I had to review my dish afterwards and wrote about the above. Didn't do so well!!!

    When in Secondary School the principal got all boys out of the classes and forced us to clean the corridors and locker areas.

    My sister has been in multiple car accidents and can still get cheaper insurance than me! I have not been in any car accidents.

    If there's ever a rustling in the night or a noise, it's always the guy who has to go check, as though bullets and knives don't hurt us.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,390 ✭✭✭clairefontaine


    I was sent to a Catholic school that had just recently allowed girls in. This was back in the stone age.

    At first, the priests were still hitting the boys. They would grab them and throw them up against the walls and hit them.

    The girls were never disciplined in this way because they did not know what to do with us, so we just watched this.

    Soon enough though, they figured they can't hit the boys and not the girls. Luckily they brought equality in the right direction, and instead of deciding to grab the girls and throw them up against the walls too, they stopped hitting the boys and completely revises their disciplinary tactics so that no one got hit.


  • Registered Users Posts: 20,830 ✭✭✭✭Taltos


    Just two incidences with me.

    One job was at a female colleague's desk when out of nowhere she grabs my ass for a squeeze in full view of the rest of her team. Tore strips out of her and asked her if she wanted to follow me to HR to continue her antics - enough said.

    Other was just a few years ago, Director in the US touched me inappropriately during training. Spotted by one of her team. This girl and her colleague (a manager) came to me afterwards laughing their heads off - told them how unimpressed I was to get the response "sure if she was good looking you wouldn't have minded"... Didn't say anything to the director just had to make sure there was always furniture between us but started being brutally blunt with her in a way only I can...


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  • Registered Users Posts: 486 ✭✭DUBACC


    ncmc wrote: »
    On a much less serious note, does it bother the men here when ads say things like ‘mum’s favourite multi vitamin for their kids’ or ‘mum’s prefer this kind of yoghurt’. As a woman, it drives me mad. It’s such sexism and really is such an outdated mode of advertising when you consider in modern families and especially since the recession, it’s very often the father doing the bulk of the child minding.

    Yes absolutely - quite a growing number of ads on TV portray either that situation or, and this is one of my pet hates, the fact that the man in any scenario is a bumbling idiot who cant work a washing machine for example or do any basic task. Amazing how the gender bashing has got steadily worse over the years yet hardly anything is said.

    The other thing that annoys me - and is mentioned above in relation to helping or even being around kids - is the constant portrayal of all men to be paedophiles. It has got into everyone's psyche now at this stage, so much so that i actually leave the changing room in the gym/pool when a kid walks in. It's shocking!


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,779 ✭✭✭A Neurotic


    This may be slightly OT, but something that I had an argument about with a few mates springs to mind.

    While travelling through a town on a bus, I saw a wall mural and a sign saying "WOMEN AND CHILDREN SAY NO TO SEXUAL ABUSE".

    It struck me as an odd thing to say. To me it seemed to imply women and children were banding together to fight off men, the perpetrators of sexual abuse. I thought a more reasonable slogan would have been something like "THE PEOPLE OF [TOWN] SAY NO TO SEXUAL ABUSE".

    I accept that the majority of sexual abusers are men, but of course the vast minority of men are sexual abusers.

    My friends thought I was being overly PC, and to a certain extent I see their point, but it still bothered me. Why single out men as a group *not* saying no to sexual abuse?


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,269 ✭✭✭GalwayGuy2


    @A Neuratic

    It's a bit strange. Surely every-bodies against sexual abuse :S

    Was it spray painted on? Like was it by the Town's administration, or just some random group of people? I know, hard to tell when your driving through:P


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 19,777 ✭✭✭✭The Corinthian


    This demonization (or pedoization) of men is par for the course. To begin with Women and children are portrayed as the only victims. For example, according to the Turn Off the Red Light campaign against prostitution's home page:
    "Women and children are exploited in Ireland’s sex industry. Some have been trafficked into Ireland in order to be made work in the sex industry.

    Very few women choose to willingly engage in prostitution. Most who are involved have had very few real choices."

    This despite the number of male prostitutes in the sex industry. You'll note that on that page, while women are repeatedly cited as victims, the only mention of men is as the clients of prostitutes - the perpetrators.

    Meanwhile, returning to the specific area of child abuse, where abuse is perpetrated by a woman, the crime is inevitably toned down. For example, according to the Canadian Press:
    "The affair ran from January to June 2005 after the boy made Internet advances. "It was her daughter's boyfriend," prosecutor Carmen Rioux said later. "She stole her boyfriend and made him her lover. They were totally involved sexually.

    "Fortunately, some people saw them kissing, walking together and holding hands – a woman of 30 and a boy of 12. They called youth protection.""

    Note the emboldened parts. At no point is it suggested that she abused the boy, but just had sex. But worse of all, they had an 'affair', a relationship, implying that it was consensual even though the whole point of protecting minors is because they cannot give consent. Now feel free to find me an article that claims a 30 year old man had an 'affair' with a 12 year old girl.

    All this has essentially left men as the only perpetrators of sexual abuse, despite the fact that 25% of sexual predators overall are female - where it comes to male victims, that figure rises to 40%. And that's just from the abuse cases that are believed - many are not; after all, aren't they just lucky?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,301 ✭✭✭Daveysil15


    Wompa1 wrote: »
    I got my junk grabbed in the line for a nightclub in plain view of the bouncers. Apparently it was a laughing matter.

    Same thing happened to me. I also had my shirt ripped off by a group of girls in a club which was also laughed off, even though my shirt was in tatters afterwars. A group of guys doing that to a girl would be no joke.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 332 ✭✭HeadPig


    I find it interesting the way our conceptions of gender equality are reflected by language.

    I've often heard a girl jokingly say of a male friend/boyfriend: "if he ever did that I'd chop his [testicles] off" and everyone has a laugh. Whereas if a man were to say: "if she ever did that I'd chop her [breasts] off" you can imagine the awkward silence followed by accusatory comments.

    Threatened violence against men is funny; threatened violence against women is apparently disgusting.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,876 ✭✭✭iptba


    HeadPig wrote: »
    I find it interesting the way our conceptions of gender equality are reflected by language.

    I've often heard a girl jokingly say of a male friend/boyfriend: "if he ever did that I'd chop his [testicles] off" and everyone has a laugh. Whereas if a man were to say: "if she ever did that I'd chop her [breasts] off" you can imagine the awkward silence followed by accusatory comments.

    Threatened violence against men is funny; threatened violence against women is apparently disgusting.
    And I'm not sure it's just threatening violence. As the story was reported*, when a wife of a well-known US golfer found out about his affairs, she started swinging a golf club at him, he had to run out of the house and try to reverse away, while she swung a club at the vehicle, damaging it. He injured himself crashing into a tree.

    It seems there is a sort of acceptance that to some extent such behaviour is somewhat understandable if it's a woman doing it to a man (it would be seen as a major mitigating factor) while there is virtually no acceptance of it being much of a mitigating factor if the genders were reversed (e.g. a man got angry if he found out his wife/partner was having/had an affair).

    In general, even getting away from violence, it seems women "punishing" men for what is seen as something they did wrong (e.g. making them sleep on the couch) is seen as more acceptable than men punishing women in some way.

    * who knows what actually happened


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 81 ✭✭tsiehta


    HeadPig wrote: »
    I find it interesting the way our conceptions of gender equality are reflected by language.

    I've often heard a girl jokingly say of a male friend/boyfriend: "if he ever did that I'd chop his [testicles] off" and everyone has a laugh. Whereas if a man were to say: "if she ever did that I'd chop her [breasts] off" you can imagine the awkward silence followed by accusatory comments.

    Threatened violence against men is funny; threatened violence against women is apparently disgusting.
    Usually, in the case of a woman, it's a rape/sexual violence related joke rather than a purely violent one.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 19,777 ✭✭✭✭The Corinthian


    tsiehta wrote: »
    Usually, in the case of a woman, it's a rape/sexual violence related joke rather than a purely violent one.
    Except that such jokes are not considered acceptable, while bizarrely jokes involving female on male violence are.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,207 ✭✭✭jaffacakesyum


    Except that such jokes are not considered acceptable, while bizarrely jokes involving female on male violence are.

    I must run in awful social circles because jokes about punching women in the ovaries is completely acceptable amongst some of my friends :o :pac:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 19,777 ✭✭✭✭The Corinthian


    I must run in awful social circles because jokes about punching women in the ovaries is completely acceptable amongst some of my friends :o :pac:
    Politically incorrect or tasteless jokes are always going to be cracked privately amongst people. What differentiates jokes about men or women being attacked is that jokes about punching women in the ovaries cannot be done in public without resulting in immediate and total condemnation, while jokes about a woman cutting off a man's penis appear to still be seen as funny and acceptable by many:



    I really cannot see how you can compare the two with a straight face, TBH.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,923 ✭✭✭Playboy


    No
    Not sure if posted before but penile amputations (by wives on husbands) are somewhat of a common problem in Thailand.

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2012/nov/19/improbable-research-thai-women-cut-off-penis


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,158 ✭✭✭Arawn


    maybe
    The army have sexist entry requirements that mean the women get in easier than males


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,158 ✭✭✭Arawn


    maybe
    Daveysil15 wrote: »
    Same thing happened to me. I also had my shirt ripped off by a group of girls in a club which was also laughed off, even though my shirt was in tatters afterwars. A group of guys doing that to a girl would be no joke.

    It once got out in school when I was 16 that I had got my nipples pierced(some guys on a not scool team seen and told people) So naturally a good few girls were curious, asked to see I said no, Come lunch I literally had my jumper and shirt pulled off me by about 6 girls during which 2 teachers male and female just walked by laughing and drinking their coffee. I can guarantee you that if just one guy let alone a group of them did this to a girl guards would of been called


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Home & Garden Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 22,326 CMod ✭✭✭✭Pawwed Rig


    Arawn wrote: »
    The army have sexist entry requirements that mean the women get in easier than males
    So do the civil service


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 19,777 ✭✭✭✭The Corinthian


    Pawwed Rig wrote: »
    So do the civil service
    Forgive my ignorance, but how?


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,876 ✭✭✭iptba


    Pawwed Rig wrote: »
    So do the civil service
    Not doubting you but can you give one or more examples of what you are thinking of.


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Home & Garden Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 22,326 CMod ✭✭✭✭Pawwed Rig


    2 points
    For the entry exam for the civil service there are three tests (apptitude type). The best results get you an interview. One of them is a numerical test. The opinion (rightly or wrongly) is that men are better at Maths. For that reason the numerical test is excluded from the overall result.

    Secondly and this is anecdotal from family members who work in CS. If there is say 10 jobs advertised at a particular grade it can be the case where they will only hire women where there is seen to be a lack of women in the relevant grade. So if there are 50 applicants with 10 of them women then they may put all women through for balance.


    Edit: btw with regard to the Maths there was evidence that men were better at Maths than women years ago but it seems to have evened out now by the latest studies I have seen


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,876 ✭✭✭iptba


    Pawwed Rig wrote: »
    Edit: btw with regard to the Maths there was evidence that men were better at Maths than women years ago but it seems to have evened out now by the latest studies I have seen
    I don't know which studies you are referring to. I have seen some spin on this e.g. that the percentages of girls doing L. Cert honours maths who get an honour is similar, or even a few percentages higher, than males. However, when one looks at the raw numbers, more boys than girls get honours and in terms of A1s, the difference is bigger again.

    A lot of data going back many decades that boys did better than girls in mathematical SATs (used for college entry in the US) and vice versa for verbal tests (girls doing better). Don't believe that has changed but a few years since I looked.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,876 ✭✭✭iptba


    Pawwed Rig wrote: »
    2 points
    For the entry exam for the civil service there are three tests (apptitude type). The best results get you an interview. One of them is a numerical test. The opinion (rightly or wrongly) is that men are better at Maths. For that reason the numerical test is excluded from the overall result.
    Interesting (although don't fully understand what you are saying).
    Pawwed Rig wrote: »
    Secondly and this is anecdotal from family members who work in CS. If there is say 10 jobs advertised at a particular grade it can be the case where they will only hire women where there is seen to be a lack of women in the relevant grade. So if there are 50 applicants with 10 of them women then they may put all women through for balance.
    I have heard now and again all-women shortlists in the civil service being openly discussed in media interviews e.g. by Ministers.


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Home & Garden Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 22,326 CMod ✭✭✭✭Pawwed Rig


    iptba wrote: »
    Interesting (although don't fully understand what you are saying).

    3 tests, one numerical, one comprehension and the final one is decision making. So 300 marks available. The top 10% get interviews.
    It was thought men were better at the numerical test so the total result is actually out of 200 marks (comprehension/decision making) and the numerical test is just a pass/fail. This was to give women a better chance of success.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,390 ✭✭✭clairefontaine


    Pawwed Rig wrote: »
    3 tests, one numerical, one comprehension and the final one is decision making. So 300 marks available. The top 10% get interviews.
    It was thought men were better at the numerical test so the total result is actually out of 200 marks (comprehension/decision making) and the numerical test is just a pass/fail. This was to give women a better chance of success.

    Is this compensation for women of certain generations not allowed to take honours math?


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,876 ✭✭✭iptba


    Is this compensation for women of certain generations not allowed to take honours math?
    We did aptitude tests in school (4th year) and they didn't require knowledge of a particular maths syllabus. Similarly the mathematical questions that are part of IQ tests don't require knowledge of a particular syllabus.

    My guess is that if there is a required amount of knowledge, it would be covered in the ordinary level syllabus at Leaving Cert level. Apart from anything else, only around 15-20% of the total L. Cert cohort having been doing Honours for a few decades.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 81 ✭✭tsiehta


    Politically incorrect or tasteless jokes are always going to be cracked privately amongst people. What differentiates jokes about men or women being attacked is that jokes about punching women in the ovaries cannot be done in public without resulting in immediate and total condemnation, while jokes about a woman cutting off a man's penis appear to still be seen as funny and acceptable by many:



    I really cannot see how you can compare the two with a straight face, TBH.
    Well, originally the point raised was about private conversation, not public jokes. I've heard enough "I'd rape her", "She deserves to be raped" etc. in certain social circles to know that that's not true.

    But in any case, jokes about rape and violence against women are quite common on mainstream TV. Daniel Tosh does it quite frequently on his show:



    You also have Meg on Family Guy, who's entire point on the show is to be constantly verbally and physically abused.

    Also, while not jokes, you have the Steubenville case, with a disturbing amount media coverage sympathizing with the rapists, and hardly mentioning the victim, along with plenty of awful, public tweets, facebook messages etc. .

    The idea that violence against women is universally condemned in public and never joked about compared to violence against men is just false.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 8,170 ✭✭✭Wompa1


    tsiehta wrote: »
    Well, originally the point raised was about private conversation, not public jokes. I've heard enough "I'd rape her", "She deserves to be raped" etc. in certain social circles to know that that's not true.

    But in any case, jokes about rape and violence against women are quite common on mainstream TV. Daniel Tosh does it quite frequently on his show:



    You also have Meg on Family Guy, who's entire point on the show is to be constantly verbally and physically abused.

    Also, while not jokes, you have the Steubenville case, with a disturbing amount media coverage sympathizing with the rapists, and hardly mentioning the victim, along with plenty of awful, public tweets, facebook messages etc. .

    The idea that violence against women is universally condemned in public and never joked about compared to violence against men is just false.

    That's a little disingenuous. Daniel Tosh does not do it on his show a lot. Also he caused an uproar when he did. It started a debate amongst comedians about whether he crossed the line and the consensus was he clearly spoke in jest. Tosh.O is kind of a sh!tty show, he makes purposely controversial remarks about videos online. It's crappy tv.


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