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Spending my 20's living in my head

  • 27-02-2013 2:06pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi, just looking for tips and how to stop being such a ponderous person. I'm 23 and ever since the age of 20, I've noticed that I overthink everything. I've posted numerous times on boards looking for help with such things as break ups, not being able to get over a person. Not having enough friends. But I think I've finally copped that the fact I'm pretty much living inside my own head is stopping me from enjoying life. The problem is I don't know how to stop being like that. I think people who enjoy life the most are those that don't take it too seriously, but my issue is that I don't have a clue how to restructure my mentality into pretty much just not caring as much about every little thing wrong in my life.


Comments

  • #2
    Boombastic
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,496 ✭✭✭Boombastic


    LivingInMyHead wrote: »
    Hi, just looking for tips and how to stop being such a ponderous person. I'm 23 and ever since the age of 20, I've noticed that I overthink everything. I've posted numerous times on boards looking for help with such things as break ups, not being able to get over a person. Not having enough friends. But I think I've finally copped that the fact I'm pretty much living inside my own head is stopping me from enjoying life. The problem is I don't know how to stop being like that. I think people who enjoy life the most are those that don't take it too seriously, but my issue is that I don't have a clue how to restructure my mentality into pretty much just not caring as much about every little thing wrong in my life.

    Keep yourself busy with things you enjoy doing. You won't have as much time to ponder over everything. Sorry, that's about all the advice I can offer.


  • #3
    sashafierce
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,599 ✭✭✭sashafierce


    This post has been deleted.


  • #4
    Forever Hopeful
    Closed Accounts Posts: 275 ✭✭Forever Hopeful


    That's what being in your 20s is all about... You've responsibility for your life and no life experience for reference.
    You know the saying, you can't put an old head on young shoulders.
    I read so many posts on here that I would have written myself in my 20s (late 30s now) and I so wish I knew then what I know now.
    What that is, is who gives a rats ass what you do, think, want, be. Just be yourself and it will all fall into place. Your 20s are power struggles between friends/partners etc but looking back the ppl who didn't get involved who let it wash off them were the least stressed. There is no such thing as the right decision. What you gain on the swings, you lose on the roundabouts!


  • #5
    MikeD22
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 147 ✭✭MikeD22


    You have to let yourself let things go. I was doing the same thing up until recently and its just a matter of being kinder to yourself and you will find yourself letting things go.

    If you find yourself overthinking just tell yourself to stop. worked for me...give it a go.


  • #6
    tony81
    Closed Accounts Posts: 595 ✭✭✭tony81


    Op, do you believe in a higher power?
    If so, it can helpful to say "Dear God, I would like XYZ. However I trust your judgement". This attitude allows you to consider what you would like to happen, but ultimately recognise that if it doesn't come about it's for a good reason!
    Similarly, a spiritual person who doesn't have a specific deity can also believe that "everything happens for a reason".
    And if you're an atheist: when you're dead you're dead so you shouldn't waste effort worrying about things you can't change.

    I don't mean to sound cynical, however there really is no point wasting mental effort on things that are outside your control. The happiest people realise this regardless of their faith, but it can be hard changing your mindset.


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  • #7
    Overheal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 86,729 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    tony81 wrote: »
    Op, do you believe in a higher power?

    ....
    Let me just, contribute.. to this post by saying that a Higher Power to an Atheist/Deist/Agnostic/Anybody/etc can take just about any form. It might help to think of a higher power as simply being the highest reaches of your own consciousness. I mean, for some people thinking of it in terms of Yahweh or Lord Xenu is a help, but those people are not me.

    OP my advice may sound odd but think about taking an Introduction to Psychology course. After taking one myself I became far more self aware of my own mental processes and it was a big help. Kinda shocking too, to do the self analysis (Critical Thinking) and realize just how abusively I was talking down to myself, in my own circumstances. But anyone can relate to psychology: understanding the mainstream theories about how our brains work can go a long way to helping ourselves make our own brains work in our favor.


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