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Prison as a lifestyle choice.

  • 26-01-2013 12:04am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭


    I think I will Pack it in, the hole lot, job family mortgage bills pressure stress and the two week holidays to distress from the other 50 weeks in the year.
    What will I get if I break the law?
    A prison sentence as punishment not for punishment
    +free 24 hours heating
    +free electricity
    +free doctor who can be seen daily.
    +free perscriptions
    +free dentistry
    +free a choice of breakfast
    +free a choice of dinner
    +free a choice of lunch or tea
    +free a prison officer visits cell and takes order for shops, also prison officer delivers my goods into my hand.
    +free bed sheets cleaned once a week for me
    +free gym membership
    +free hospital bed
    +free alot more that I have not taught of.

    Prisoners in Portloise prison and other category A prisoners around the country can sent out for takeaways each evening and have them delivered
    to their cells.

    Our ratio for prison officer/prisoner in Ireland is 1/1
    In the USA its 1/50
    Yes thats right 50 times more prison officers in Ireland and very highly paid at that.
    Their official name is prison officer but their duty is more carer, that panders to the prisoners needs.

    Yes prison seems to be a viable lifestyle choice.


«1

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 731 ✭✭✭Tonto86


    Ya forgot the rape, it'll be free rape, but rape all the same


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭celticcrash


    Tonto86 wrote: »
    Ya forgot the rape, it'll be free rape, but rape all the same
    I am to old and ugly for that.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,992 ✭✭✭✭gurramok


    Prisoners can't go on holiday but yeh they have a holiday when incarcerated.

    I've said this before. If I ever became homeless and starving, i'd commit a crime(perhaps steal food from a shop) in order to keep me alive as prison takes care of you!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,972 ✭✭✭orestes


    I think I will Pack it in, the hole lot, job family mortgage bills pressure stress and the two week holidays to distress from the other 50 weeks in the year.
    What will I get if I break the law?
    A prison sentence as punishment not for punishment
    +free 24 hours heating
    +free electricity
    +free doctor who can be seen daily.
    +free perscriptions
    +free dentistry
    +free a choice of breakfast
    +free a choice of dinner
    +free a choice of lunch or tea
    +free a prison officer visits cell and takes order for shops, also prison officer delivers my goods into my hand.
    +free bed sheets cleaned once a week for me
    +free gym membership
    +free hospital bed
    +free alot more that I have not taught of.

    Prisoners in Portloise prison and other category A prisoners around the country can sent out for takeaways each evening and have them delivered
    to their cells.

    Our ratio for prison officer/prisoner in Ireland is 1/1
    In the USA its 1/50
    Yes thats right 50 times more prison officers in Ireland and very highly paid at that.
    Their official name is prison officer but their duty is more carer, that panders to the prisoners needs.

    Yes prison seems to be a viable lifestyle choice.

    Do you have a source to back this up with? Hearing it from some guy down the pub doesn't count.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭celticcrash


    orestes wrote: »
    Do you have a source to back this up with? Hearing it from some guy down the pub doesn't count.
    Which part dont you believe?


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,970 ✭✭✭Lenin Skynard


    I am to old and ugly for that.

    You're Marilyn Monroe by prison standards. Butter is free too.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,972 ✭✭✭orestes


    Which part dont you believe?

    The post as a whole. If you can't back up your claims, it's free reign to dismiss them as bullshit.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,902 ✭✭✭✭28064212


    Our ratio for prison officer/prisoner in Ireland is 1/1
    That's total bullshit. At the end of 2010 there were 3,522 staff in the Irish Prison Service, including civilian grades and headquarters staff. The overall daily average number of prisoners in custody in 2010 was 4,290

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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 653 ✭✭✭girl in the striped socks


    In all the free things you mentioned you neglected to acknowledge your freedom is gone.
    Prisons in this country are far too luxurious in my opinion but you still can't put a price on freedom.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,327 ✭✭✭Madam_X


    Go for it OP - the intimidation thing in there would just be a minor setback.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭celticcrash


    28064212 wrote: »
    That's total bullshit. At the end of 2010 there were 3,522 staff in the Irish Prison Service, including civilian grades and headquarters staff. The overall daily average number of prisoners in custody in 2010 was 4,290
    Thanks so its 3/4 ;)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 23,688 ✭✭✭✭mickdw


    28064212 wrote: »
    That's total bullsh[COLOR="Black"]i[/COLOR]t. At the end of 2010 there were 3,522 staff in the Irish Prison Service, including civilian grades and headquarters staff. The overall daily average number of prisoners in custody in 2010 was 4,290
    Well based on those figures, its hardly total bull****. 1.2 to 1 roughly is still a disgrace.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,938 ✭✭✭mackg


    Madam_X wrote: »
    Go for it OP - the intimidation thing in there would just be a minor setback.

    Op strikes me as the wizened Morgan Freeman type who is philosophical about his situation, stays out of harms way and spends his days dispensing thoughtful insights to the other prisoners. So naturally it wouldn't be too much of a problem.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,689 ✭✭✭Tombi!


    If someone has a car I can smash up and will call the gardaí, I'll be honoured to go to jail and let everyone know how it is.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,109 ✭✭✭Cavehill Red


    Tonto86 wrote: »
    Ya forgot the rape, it'll be free rape, but rape all the same

    Forgive me for asking, but isn't all rape 'free'? I mean, is there anybody on earth deranged enough to pay for it?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,775 ✭✭✭Death and Taxes


    I think I will Pack it in, the hole lot, job family mortgage bills pressure stress and the two week holidays to distress from the other 50 weeks in the year.
    What will I get if I break the law?
    A prison sentence as punishment not for punishment
    +free 24 hours heating
    +free electricity
    +free doctor who can be seen daily.
    +free perscriptions
    +free dentistry
    +free a choice of breakfast
    +free a choice of dinner
    +free a choice of lunch or tea
    +free a prison officer visits cell and takes order for shops, also prison officer delivers my goods into my hand.
    +free bed sheets cleaned once a week for me
    +free gym membership
    +free hospital bed
    +free alot more that I have not taught of.

    Prisoners in Portloise prison and other category A prisoners around the country can sent out for takeaways each evening and have them delivered
    to their cells.

    Our ratio for prison officer/prisoner in Ireland is 1/1
    In the USA its 1/50
    Yes thats right 50 times more prison officers in Ireland and very highly paid at that.
    Their official name is prison officer but their duty is more carer, that panders to the prisoners needs.

    Yes prison seems to be a viable lifestyle choice.
    I think I will Pack it in, the hole lot, job family mortgage bills pressure stress and the two week holidays to distress from the other 50 weeks in the year.
    What will I get if I break the law?
    A prison sentence as punishment not for punishment
    +free 24 hours heating
    +free electricity
    +free doctor who can be seen daily.
    +free perscriptions
    +free dentistry
    +free a choice of breakfast Bolloxologly doesn't happen
    +free a choice of dinner Bolloxologly doesn't happen
    +free a choice of lunch or tea Bolloxologly doesn't happen
    +free a prison officer visits cell and takes order for shops, also prison officer delivers my goods into my hand. Bolloxology,doesn't happen!
    +free bed sheets cleaned once a week for me
    +free gym membership
    +free hospital bed
    +free alot more that I have not taught of. Because they dont exist

    Prisoners in Portloise prison and other category A prisoners around the country can sent out for takeaways each evening and have them delivered
    to their cells.Untrue and we dont catagorise prisoners on an ABC basis in this state, never mind cater to their take away requests

    Our ratio for prison officer/prisoner in Ireland is 1/1
    In the USA its 1/50
    Yes thats right 50 times more prison officers in Ireland and very highly paid at that.
    Their official name is prison officer but their duty is more carer, that panders to the prisoners needs.Bolloxology, but shows your level of ignorance on that of which you speak, Walter Mitty!

    Yes prison seems to be a viable lifestyle choice.
    Your list left out:
    lack of liberty
    Using a bucket as a toilet in the same cell you share with 1/2/3/4/5+ others,in the same small space in which you eat.
    No say in how you day/wee/month/year is organized
    No say in what ypu eat
    No say in what work you do, regardless of your skills, experience,qualifications.
    No sex, no holding your wife and kissing her.
    No holding your kids in your arms.
    No writing or recieving a letter uncensored
    No internet

    where did you get your info, perhaps it was at "Ignorant and bored trolls .com?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,472 ✭✭✭✭Grayson


    I am to old and ugly for that.

    So it'll just be beatings and shankings then?

    It would appear that prison/get tough on crime/ Your an liberal pussy has replaced Abortion/church/your an liberal pussy as the topic du jour.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭celticcrash


    The thread is just to show up the prison system and how soft it is.
    Me saying that I am going to break the law is just to push the story.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,485 ✭✭✭Thrill


    A prison sentence as punishment not for punishment
    +free 24 hours heating
    +free electricity
    +free doctor who can be seen daily.
    +free perscriptions
    +free dentistry
    +free a choice of breakfast
    +free a choice of dinner
    +free a choice of lunch or tea
    +free a prison officer visits cell and takes order for shops, also prison officer delivers my goods into my hand.
    +free bed sheets cleaned once a week for me
    +free gym membership
    +free hospital bed
    +free alot more that I have not taught of.

    Everything free. Except you.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,652 ✭✭✭fasttalkerchat


    Its a great choice but the long term prospects aren't great. Once you have it on your record you are limited to only criminal career choices in future... although they are better paid and the only risk is... going back to prison!

    Its a good choice if you don't mind staying single and taking the odd bumming... now we know why no one chooses the priesthood!


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,815 ✭✭✭imitation


    Prision rabble rabble dole rabble rabble rent allowance rabble rabble public sector workers rabble rabble


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,972 ✭✭✭orestes


    If someone has a car I can smash up and will call the gardaí, I'll be honoured to go to jail and let everyone know how it is.

    Give me a few days to make sure the insurance is up to scratch and you're on.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,992 ✭✭✭✭gurramok


    No sex, no holding your wife and kissing her.

    What have you got against gays? :) :P


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭celticcrash


    Your list left out:
    lack of liberty
    Using a bucket as a toilet in the same cell you share with 1/2/3/4/5+ others,in the same small space in which you eat. Rubbish
    No say in how you day/wee/month/year is organized no stress
    No say in what ypu eat yes there is a choice
    No say in what work you do, regardless of your skills, experience,qualifications. you dont have to work if you dont want to.
    No sex, no holding your wife and kissing her. Thats about to change
    No holding your kids in your arms. thats about to change
    No writing or recieving a letter uncensored wow
    No internet yes they have

    where did you get your info, perhaps it was at "Ignorant and bored trolls .com?
    Thats nice


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,689 ✭✭✭Tombi!


    gurramok wrote: »
    What have you got against gays? :) :P

    I think you misunderstand him.
    In prison, you become the wife. :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,902 ✭✭✭✭28064212


    Thanks so its 3/4 ;)
    mickdw wrote: »
    Well based on those figures, its hardly total bull****. 1.2 to 1 roughly is still a disgrace.
    Did you both somehow manage to miss the bolded parts. TOTAL staff. Including cleaning staff, admin staff, nurses, orderlies, psychologists... The most recent figures I can find for Prison Officers is here: http://debates.oireachtas.ie/dail/2008/09/24/00548.asp - 1898 officers. So more like 1:2.2 ratio. In the UK, it was 1:2.9 in 2009. Your 1:50 figure in the US is not comparable, as it refers to officers on duty to inmates, whereas the Irish and UK figures refer to the total number of officers employed at any one time

    So yeah, total bullshit

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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭celticcrash


    28064212 wrote: »
    Did you both somehow manage to miss the bolded parts. TOTAL staff. Including cleaning staffno cleaning staff, admin staff, nursesno nurses, orderliesno orderlies, psychologistsno psychologists... The most recent figures I can find for Prison Officers is here: http://debates.oireachtas.ie/dail/2008/09/24/00548.asp - 1898 officers. So more like 1:2.2 ratio. In the UK, it was 1:2.9 in 2009. Your 1:50 figure in the US is not comparable, as it refers to officers on duty to inmates, whereas the Irish and UK figures refer to the total number of officers employed at any one time

    So yeah, total bullshit
    If you disagree with my posts thats ok but stop calling them bull****.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,132 ✭✭✭SRFC


    Yeah has everything bar a little thing whats that word im looking for FREEDOM.



    You would also crap yourself on entry to prison within minutes when you realise its not a holiday camp as some people like to think of it,if you make it onto one of these landings where you will be extorted for any possesions and will be sliced up by gangs who take control of the landings such as limerick boys who stick together or dublin lads ect ect who do be at war on a daily basis but sure give it a shot.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 731 ✭✭✭Tonto86



    Forgive me for asking, but isn't all rape 'free'? I mean, is there anybody on earth deranged enough to pay for it?

    Well there's my dragons den idea ruined!


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  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 18,184 ✭✭✭✭Lapin


    Go for it OP.

    You seem to be forgetting one thing though.

    In order to be sent to prison you need to be found guilty of a crime.

    And as there is no such thing as a victimless crime you will also have plenty of time to think about that when you're locked up.

    A conscience if free too.

    And unlike your claim that prisoners have a choice of breakfast (ie take it or leave it), a clean conscience is something far more valuable.

    If you can live with the knowledge that you have you have been unjust to others, then the cells of Mountjoy and Portlaoise are all yours.

    And I won't give a toss how many prison officers it takes to keep you in there.

    You enjoy your choice of breakfast on the inside - I'll enjoy my choice of freedom on the outside.

    Watch out for the soap.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,972 ✭✭✭orestes


    If you disagree with my posts thats ok but stop calling them bull****.

    Don't say I didn't try to warn you.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 499 ✭✭greenflash


    I did some work in the new wing in Portlaoise a few years back and can honestly say It's nicer than most Travelodges I've stayed in.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 32,956 ✭✭✭✭Omackeral


    I work in a well known Dublin Prison. I've posted similar to this before but here's a real insight into daily life inside for an inmate.


    - 8.10am Called and offered breakfast. (Cereal and Tea)
    They collect it from a servery and go back to their cells to eat it. There is no Dining Hall like in movies.

    - 9.15am Unlocked for workshops, school or jobs. All other inmates go to the exercise yard. If they 'stay back', they are declared sick in cell and must remain there for the day.

    - 12pm Fall in from yard, jobs etc for Dinner. i.e. Main meal of the day.
    Return to cells and eat it there. There are no choices of meals, contrary to belief. Actually there are two choices. Take it or leave it.

    - 1pm Staff take their dinner break. Skeleton staff aka Dinner Guards on duty.

    - 2pm Unlocked again for work, school, exercise.

    - 4pm Fall in for Tea e.g. Soup and rolls, wedges and chicken, tuna salad.

    - 5pm Staff take a tea break.

    - 5.20pm. Unlocked for Recreation. Inmates play snooker, pool, table tennis, football, cards.

    - 7pm. Fall in. Inmates get hot water and milk for tea and 'Bang Out'.

    - 8pm Night Staff on Duty.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,132 ✭✭✭SRFC


    greenflash wrote: »
    I did some work in the new wing in Portlaoise a few years back and can honestly say It's nicer than most Travelodges I've stayed in.

    Except there is no exit door free to use when you want.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭celticcrash


    Ok i will tell you, an old mate of mine is after getting out after 4 years for drug dealing. He is out only 8 months and he was caught with another load of drugs. I taught he would be gutted. Guess what hes not. He looks on it the way it is on the OP.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 32,956 ✭✭✭✭Omackeral


    Lapin wrote: »
    Go for it OP.

    You seem to be forgetting one thing though.

    In order to be sent to prison you need to be found guilty of a crime.

    And as there is no such thing as a victimless crime you will also have plenty of time to think about that when you're locked up.

    A conscience if free too.

    And unlike your claim that prisoners have a choice of breakfast (ie take it or leave it), a clean conscience is something far more valuable.

    If you can live with the knowledge that you have you have been unjust to others, then the cells of Mountjoy and Portlaoise are all yours.

    Just so you know. I've dealt with prisoners who are in for non payment of fines relating to TV Licenses and parking on double yellow lines. I wouldn't class those people as 'without conscience'. Probably as victimless as it gets if OP wants to go that route ;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,249 ✭✭✭MaroonAndGreen


    Suppose if you are homeless and hungry... then its a pretty good idea!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 499 ✭✭greenflash


    SRFC wrote: »

    Except there is no exit door free to use when you want.

    Hotel California was a Travelodge?


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,132 ✭✭✭SRFC


    Omackeral wrote: »
    I work in a well known Dublin Prison. I've posted similar to this before but here's a real insight into daily life inside for an inmate.


    - 8.10am Called and offered breakfast. (Cereal and Tea)
    They collect it from a servery and go back to their cells to eat it. There is no Dining Hall like in movies.

    - 9.15am Unlocked for workshops, school or jobs. All other inmates go to the exercise yard. If they 'stay back', they are declared sick in cell and must remain there for the day.

    - 12pm Fall in from yard, jobs etc for Dinner. i.e. Main meal of the day.
    Return to cells and eat it there. There are no choices of meals, contrary to belief. Actually there are two choices. Take it or leave it.

    - 1pm Staff take their dinner break. Skeleton staff aka Dinner Guards on duty.

    - 2pm Unlocked again for work, school, exercise.

    - 4pm Fall in for Tea e.g. Soup and rolls, wedges and chicken, tuna salad.

    - 5pm Staff take a tea break.

    - 5.20pm. Unlocked for Recreation. Inmates play snooker, pool, table tennis, football, cards.

    - 7pm. Fall in. Inmates get hot water and milk for tea and 'Bang Out'.

    - 8pm Night Staff on Duty.


    Sounds like a nice holiday alright as some people like to call it




    add in the ****ing in a bucket at night,dangerous inmates trying to gain control of the landings and weaker prisoners with no back up forced to hold phones ect ect


    Stress free is prison life id rather live on the streets than in Mountjoy prison.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,273 ✭✭✭twowheelsonly


    I think I will Pack it in, the hole lot, job family mortgage bills pressure stress and the two week holidays to distress from the other 50 weeks in the year.
    What will I get if I break the law?
    A prison sentence as punishment not for punishment
    +free 24 hours heating - Your alternative option being????
    +free electricity - Your alternative option being????
    +free doctor who can be seen daily - Your alternative option being????
    +free perscriptions - Your alternative option being????
    +free dentistry - Where I work he's in once a fortnight and you pray that you're lucky enough to get called!
    +free a choice of breakfast - That's true actually, you can take it or leave it!!
    +free a choice of dinner - As above
    +free a choice of lunch or tea - ????? WTF
    +free a prison officer visits cell and takes order for shops, also prison officer delivers my goods into my hand. - Again, where I work this is true - if you're in isolation, on medical obs or on punishment!!
    +free bed sheets cleaned once a week for me - By other prisoners in the Prison Laundry :-)
    +free gym membership - If you're one of the first 20 to the door. No swimming pools or saunas though. Sorry about that..
    +free hospital bed - ?????? If you're in Hospital, I would presume so, yes.
    +free alot more that I have not taught of.

    Prisoners in Portloise prison and other category A prisoners around the country can sent out for takeaways each evening and have them delivered
    to their cells. :eek:

    Our ratio for prison officer/prisoner in Ireland is 1/1
    In the USA its 1/50 Whoops... makey uppy numbers!!!
    Yes thats right 50 times more prison officers in Ireland and very highly paid at that. Waaay overpaid. I'm promoted, work on the 'floor', dealing with all sorts of crap, in the job 'more than 10 but less than 20' years and take home less than 2 thirds of what my next door neighbour less than 10 years bus driver takes home. Not a problem, but don't tell me that I'm very highly paid!!
    Their official name is prison officer but their duty is more carer, that panders to the prisoners needs. Admittedly some times it feels like that, but that's down to rules and regulations. Not the fault of the Officers. You should be there some time when the schwitt hits the fan though and you'll see how 'caring' they can be!!

    Yes prison seems to be a viable lifestyle choice.
    28064212 wrote: »
    That's total bullshit. At the end of 2010 there were 3,522 staff in the Irish Prison Service, including civilian grades and headquarters staff. The overall daily average number of prisoners in custody in 2010 was 4,290
    mickdw wrote: »
    Well based on those figures, its hardly total bull****. 1.2 to 1 roughly is still a disgrace.

    Those numbers have shrunk considerably since then (2010) Don't have up to date figures but there's been an embargo on recruitment and a raft of retirements - in particular up to last Februarys 'cut-off' date. This is also based on overall staff numbers as mentioned earlier. This includes admin staff, escort staff, search unit staff, Governors, clerks, kitchen and workshop staff. It's also 24/7 so there's back to back rosters (which straight away cuts each days average in half!!) as well as having nights and sometimes we take a few days holidays :)
    When we're actually unlocking the landings at any stage the numbers of staff on the landings to numbers of prisoners on the landings ratio is nowhere near that!!! I'd love to give you an idea but I don't think that it's appropriate on here.



    Regarding the OPs 'makey uppy' numbers : (USA Figures..)
    Inmate-to-staff ratios

    Between 2000 and 2005, the number of inmates incarcerated in
    state and federal facilities rose 10%, nearly 3 times faster
    than the number of employees (up 3%) working in state and
    federal facilities. The largest increase in inmate-to-staff
    ratios occurred among federal facilities, from 3.4 to 1 in
    2000 to 4.9 in 2005 (table 5). The largest increases in
    inmate-to-staff ratios among facilities under state authority
    occurred in Oklahoma, Arizona, and South Carolina (appendix
    table 14). Among the few jurisdictions that reported a
    decrease in their inmate-to-staff ratio during this period,
    North Dakota reported the largest decrease, from 3.1 in 2000
    to 2.3 in 2005.

    Nationwide, the ratio of inmates-to-correctional officers
    increased from 4.8 to 1 in 2000 to 5.1 in 2005.
    In both
    federal prisons (10.3) and in facilities in Alabama (9.3),
    the ratio of inmates-to-correctional officers was about twice
    the national average.

    The ratio of inmates-to-staff in community-based facilities
    was 3.5 to 1 in 2005, down from 3.8 five years earlier.
    Facilities in Alabama (8.1) had the highest ratio of
    inmates-to-staff; South Dakota (1.6) had the lowest.
    3

    From this report : http://bjs.ojp.usdoj.gov/content/pub/ascii/csfcf05.txt


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭celticcrash


    Theres many people in this country in a financial prison.
    Theres many people in this country in a mental prison.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,972 ✭✭✭orestes


    Theres many people in this country in a financial prison.
    Theres many people in this country in a mental prison.

    Are you just quoting fortune cookies now?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,409 ✭✭✭✭endacl


    +free 24 hours heating
    +free electricity
    +free doctor who can be seen daily.
    +free perscriptions
    +free dentistry
    +free a choice of breakfast
    +free a choice of dinner
    +free a choice of lunch or tea
    +free a prison officer visits cell and takes order for shops, also prison officer delivers my goods into my hand.
    +free bed sheets cleaned once a week for me
    +free gym membership
    +free hospital bed
    +free alot more that I have not taught of.
    I spent a day in Wheatfield last year. Not for a crime or misdeameanour. Invited to visit the arts exhibition. You forgot to include +free arts.

    To tell the truth, even only spending six hours there, I have never felt so claustrophobic and trapped in my life. You might as well add +free lollipops. A sh1ttier place to be stuck in I can not imagine. Horrible place. No sky, no holiday.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭celticcrash


    I changed my mind, I dont want to go to prison anymore.
    Because twowheelonly would be there and he would get me for whistleblowing on his easy highly overpaid job.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,496 ✭✭✭Boombastic


    Do they cater for vegetarians does anyone know?

    OP just buy a telly without getting a licence if you want to get inside for research purposes


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭celticcrash


    Boombastic wrote: »
    Do they cater for vegetarians does anyone know?

    OP just buy a telly without getting a licence if you want to get inside for research purposes
    Yes they cater for veggies. religious diets and any health diet.
    I could not do that to pour RTE my conscience would not allow me.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,097 ✭✭✭Herb Powell


    Would you ever feck off and go to prison if it is so fantastic


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 314 ✭✭0066ad


    Your list left out:
    lack of liberty
    Using a bucket as a toilet in the same cell you share with 1/2/3/4/5+ others,in the same small space in which you eat.
    No say in how you day/wee/month/year is organized
    No say in what ypu eat
    No say in what work you do, regardless of your skills, experience,qualifications.
    No sex, no holding your wife and kissing her.
    No holding your kids in your arms.
    No writing or recieving a letter uncensored
    No internet

    where did you get your info, perhaps it was at "Ignorant and bored trolls .com?


    Where did you get your info, watching shaw dank redemption :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭celticcrash


    TO twowheelsonly

    Prisoners in Portloise prison and other category A prisoners around the country can sent out for takeaways each evening and have them delivered
    to their cells.

    Is this pub talk.
    Tell the truth now.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 220 ✭✭JonEBGud


    I think I will Pack it in, the hole lot, job family mortgage bills pressure stress and the two week holidays to distress from the other 50 weeks in the year.
    What will I get if I break the law?
    A prison sentence as punishment not for punishment
    +free 24 hours heating
    +free electricity
    +free doctor who can be seen daily.
    +free perscriptions
    +free dentistry
    +free a choice of breakfast
    +free a choice of dinner
    +free a choice of lunch or tea
    +free a prison officer visits cell and takes order for shops, also prison officer delivers my goods into my hand.
    +free bed sheets cleaned once a week for me
    +free gym membership
    +free hospital bed
    +free alot more that I have not taught of.

    Prisoners in Portloise prison and other category A prisoners around the country can sent out for takeaways each evening and have them delivered
    to their cells.

    Our ratio for prison officer/prisoner in Ireland is 1/1
    In the USA its 1/50
    Yes thats right 50 times more prison officers in Ireland and very highly paid at that.
    Their official name is prison officer but their duty is more carer, that panders to the prisoners needs.

    Yes prison seems to be a viable lifestyle choice.

    How can I apply for a fortnights accommodation from Feb. 4th. to Feb. 18?
    Need to know, 'cause getting kicked out of bedsit on 3rd. of Feb. and can't get into new flat 'till 19th.


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