worried coz she says she doesnt like dark.

simply simple

as soon as it starts getting dark and during the early dark hours of day my 4 years old daughter says that "why does it get dark? (in a very frustrating manner). I dont like dark".

we came here as immigrants so obviously we dont have very large friend circle that meets very often and so is with my daughter. And my daughter has started going to Montessori from this September for which she was very very excited. but recently with change in staff I dont see that level of excitement in her. Not sure if I should relate both these things togather but her frustration with dark times has not started recently, it is since this winter started.

I am really worried about it, ususally everytime i answer her giving the reasons to get happy becoz its dark like we have family time when its night, we have dinner togather, we can go for drive,etc..
any other parents who have seen this or are facing this? any suggestions about how to handle this situation?

wolfpawnat

My 3yo (he is 4 next month) is the same at the moment. The dark terrifies him and we have no idea why, he goes frantic, going on about the "racing cars getting him". He loves Lightning McQueen and owns at least 100 small cars, but they don't bother him in the slightest, so I have no idea what the "racing car" is. And his used to be so good with the light off. Now we have to have a light on when he goes to sleep, but it is a tiny night light one.

It is a tough time, I know how you feel. I think they could be hearing other kids talking in pre-school and learning from them for a certain part. I know my son has picked up two horrific bad habits from one boy in his class, so perhaps it may be something like that.

Sleepy

On the fear of the dark thing, why not just get her a night-light? Ikea do a lovely one for €15.50 called "SPÖKA" that our daughter has in her room at night: http://www.ikea.com/ie/en/catalog/products/40150993/. They slowly change colours and cast quite a dim light so it's relaxing and not so bright that it'd keep them awake. Fear of the dark is a fairly understandable phobia and one that could be argued to have a hard-wired evolutionary purpose: it's fear of the unknown which is a rational enough fear tbh. It tends to go away as quick as it comes on with most children too.

Could the novelty of going to Montessori simply have worn off? My daughter was excited about going back after her Christmas break but she's no longer as enthusiastic about telling me what they did today when I get home from work or, as she was when she first started, asking her mum if she could go back to playschool for the afternoon: an hour or two after she'd left!

simply simple

Sleepy wrote: »

On the fear of the dark thing, why not just get her a night-light? Ikea do a lovely one for €15.50 called "SPÖKA" that our daughter has in her room at night: http://www.ikea.com/ie/en/catalog/products/40150993/. They slowly change colours and cast quite a dim light so it's relaxing and not so bright that it'd keep them awake. Fear of the dark is a fairly understandable phobia and one that could be argued to have a hard-wired evolutionary purpose: it's fear of the unknown which is a rational enough fear tbh. It tends to go away as quick as it comes on with most children too.]

She already have that in her room and we do keep it on the whole night. Its not just that kind of dark that she is not happy with, its when it starts getting dark outside ie, end of day time, no matter how bright the place is, how beautiful it may look (like christmas decorations) she says she dont like dark, she dont like night

Lisha

The first thing is probably to say to her
'I understand you do not like the night'
To acknowledging the feeling
If you say it's fine don't be silly night is good then she does not feel listened to which could frustrate her

Then maybe tell in a story way about all the good things that happen during night
Like us resting for fun tomorrow
Plants and snimals sleeping too
Try and reinforce the message that night is good because we rest . That if we need to see there is lights that we are lucky

With my little boy he thought lions were in spare rooms so we walked through house calling all the lions and opened the window and told them to leave. 2 or 3days of this and he forgot all about it

Best of luck op

Big Bag of Chips

I wouldn't worry too much if she just says she doesn't like it. There's lots of things children don't like!

Lots of people prefer daylight and sunlight, but accept that night is a part of it.

If she's not afraid of night time, just doesn't like it, then all you can do is explain it becomes night so that animals and birds can have a sleep.

Maybe buy a little globe, Smyths have one for €12 I think. And explain to her with a torch shining on the globe that the sun is in one spot and the earth turns around, making night and morning.

simply simple

Big Bag of Chips wrote: »

I wouldn't worry too much if she just says she doesn't like it. There's lots of things children don't like!

Lots of people prefer daylight and sunlight, but accept that night is a part of it.

If she's not afraid of night time, just doesn't like it, then all you can do is explain it becomes night so that animals and birds can have a sleep.

Maybe buy a little globe, Smyths have one for €12 I think. And explain to her with a torch shining on the globe that the sun is in one spot and the earth turns around, making night and morning.

sounds like a good idea, she is very considerate about animals and curious about how do people live on other places so might help her swallow night time

Big Bag of Chips

Show her Australia on the globe and explain when it is night time here, it is day time there.

She can have fun then with her torch and globe and finding countries where it is day time and night time.

Good luck!

ronjo

Sleepy wrote: »

On the fear of the dark thing, why not just get her a night-light? Ikea do a lovely one for €15.50 called "SPÖKA" that our daughter has in her room at night: http://www.ikea.com/ie/en/catalog/products/40150993/. They slowly change colours and cast quite a dim light so it's relaxing and not so bright that it'd keep them awake. Fear of the dark is a fairly understandable phobia and one that could be argued to have a hard-wired evolutionary purpose: it's fear of the unknown which is a rational enough fear tbh. It tends to go away as quick as it comes on with most children too.

Maybe I am being stupid here but it says that the battery only lasts 4-5 hours........ does that mean you cant have it on all night? or?

My daughter wakes every second night I reckon and all she wants is a light turned on so we put the landing one or bathroom one on and open her door a bit but were thinking of getting a night light.

simply simple

ronjo wrote: »

Maybe I am being stupid here but it says that the battery only lasts 4-5 hours........ does that mean you cant have it on all night? or?

My daughter wakes every second night I reckon and all she wants is a light turned on so we put the landing one or bathroom one on and open her door a bit but were thinking of getting a night light.

ohh sry, we have this one http://www.ikea.com/ie/en/catalog/products/00199312/ just saw ikea and didnt see anything ahead

Sleepy

ronjo wrote: »

Maybe I am being stupid here but it says that the battery only lasts 4-5 hours........ does that mean you cant have it on all night? or?

My daughter wakes every second night I reckon and all she wants is a light turned on so we put the landing one or bathroom one on and open her door a bit but were thinking of getting a night light.

It lasts about that on the battery, if you leave it plugged it lasts through the night.

Kaylee

When I read this I just thought of this book:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/140524075X/ref=ox_sc_sfl_title_5?ie=UTF8&psc=1&smid=A3P5ROKL5A1OLE


About an owl who is afraid of the dark but then finds out how magical it can be.

might help..?

Lisha

Just on books Julia Donaldson has a book called 'night monkey. Day monkey'
It's lovely too

anncoates

My 4 and half-year old started fretting about the dark occasionally after he had a nightmare (about a big monkey which sounds just as random as the racing car so I'd say it came from a nightmare too).

We just started leaving his bedroom door open and the landing light on and it seems to have resolved it.

ectoraige

Have you gone out on a clear night to look at the stars? You might be able to find a book about constellations and try looking for some. For me the night sky has always been something magical.