High heels

lorrha14

I have a crazy heels fetish.. I love them.. Always have and always will.. My last girl wore heels 24/7 and I loved it.. I'm with a girl now a few years and she'll wear super platforms out but from day to say wear or a lazy Sunday she won't.. I adore her and love her but the fact she won't accommodate my fetish is killing me!! I'll buy her any shoes she liked... Any advice as to how I could get her to wear them more often.. She says apart from going out heels are not her thing... Any ideas!???

downwesht

Haven't you little to bother you!

Get a life.... or get back with your ex!

RubyWoo83

lorrha14 wrote: »

I have a crazy heels fetish.. I love them.. Always have and always will.. My last girl wore heels 24/7 and I loved it.. I'm with a girl now a few years and she'll wear super platforms out but from day to say wear or a lazy Sunday she won't.. I adore her and love her but the fact she won't accommodate my fetish is killing me!! I'll buy her any shoes she liked... Any advice as to how I could get her to wear them more often.. She says apart from going out heels are not her thing... Any ideas!???

She shouldn't have to indulge in your fetish 24/7. If she'll wear them going out she'll prob wear them for "play" time.

You are being unreasonable to expect any more than that so you have to options... a) accept it or b) move on.

judgefudge

Like someone above said why does she have to indulge you 24/7? That's a bit bizarre. If she doesn't want to wear heels all the time she doesn't have to. Offering to pay is probably not going to convince her. You're offering to pay for her to wear something she doesn't want to wear. Either because of appearance or comfort or whatever her reasons are, you should respect them.

If she wears them out and I assume she'd wear them in bed if you asked.... What's the big problem?

Do you like her or the heels? Jesus.

Oryx

One of you guys has to compromise (or both of you do). You cant expect heels to be worn all the time... she wears them just to please you some of the time.

A fetish is not a problem unless and until it becomes the most important thing in a relationship or sexual encounter. Then it moves from being an added layer of excitement, to an obsession or compulsive need.

If you feel that its the heels and not the girl that is exciting you, then you really need to rethink your relationship, and perhaps examine the level your fetish has got to.

Taltos

downwesht - while you are new to PI/RI we have no tolerance for the type of post above. Take five minutes to read our charter now and if you cannot post inline with our guidelines we kindly ask you not to post.

While this issue may seem trivial to you we ask all posters to show respect to an OP and their issue.

Thanks
Taltos

ElleEm

lorrha14 wrote: »

I have a crazy heels fetish.. I love them.. Always have and always will.. My last girl wore heels 24/7 and I loved it.. I'm with a girl now a few years and she'll wear super platforms out but from day to say wear or a lazy Sunday she won't.. I adore her and love her but the fact she won't accommodate my fetish is killing me!! I'll buy her any shoes she liked... Any advice as to how I could get her to wear them more often.. She says apart from going out heels are not her thing... Any ideas!???

You can't- she is an individual, and has her own thoughts and feelings. She has told you heels aren't her thing unless she is on a night out- you should respect that.

It's fair that you like her in heels, and you could ask her to wear them in bed or whatever, but you cannot expect her to succumb to your request, and squash her feet into uncomfortable shoes every day of the week. That is a very selfish thing to ask. She wears them when she wants, and that's hhow it should be.

IrishEyes19

Have you ever worn heels 24/7? :rolleyes:
It's not as comfy as it may look to you. I don't blame the girl. Her feet would be in agony if she hasn't worn heals during the day time regularly. This is not something she should have to compromise on. It's your issue, not hers. I suggest you accept her preference or review your relationship priorities. You are being unreasonable.

I dont think she should have to compromise whatsoever. No-one ever has the right to dictate or throw a fuss over what you choose to wear. As long as you are clean, dress appropriately ect, there shouldn't be a problem.

lorrha14

IrishEyes19 wrote: »

Have you ever worn heels 24/7? :rolleyes:
It's not as comfy as it may look to you. I don't blame the girl. Her feet would be in agony if she hasn't worn heals during the day time regularly. This is not something she should have to compromise on. It's your issue, not hers. I suggest you accept her preference or review your relationship priorities. You are being unreasonable.

I dont think she should have to compromise whatsoever. No-one ever has the right to dictate or throw a fuss over what you choose to wear. As long as you are clean, dress appropriately ect, there shouldn't be a problem.

Yea I fully understand all the posts and don't want them 24/7 like my last ex.. But just a bit more often is all

kat.mac

OP, I'm assuming your girlfriend knows how much you like heels? If she does, then there's really nothing you can do if she just doesn't want to wear them more often. Yes, heels are fabulous, but they are difficult and impractical and are more difficult to wear for some more than others. Temper your expectations and just enjoy when she does wear them.

lorrha14

Thanks for all the replies and I fully understand all the answer but I mean like the cinema or a lazy Sunday!! I don't expect her in them 24/7.. Just wondering from a females point of view is there anyway I could approach it

ElleEm

lorrha14 wrote: »

Yea I fully understand all the posts and don't want them 24/7 like my last ex.. But just a bit more often is all

Do you understand that you are asking too much though? I don't wear heels very often as I find them so uncomfortable. I wouldn't be too impressed if my boyfriend tried to push me to wear them "more often" for his sexual pleasure, nit just in the bedroom, but ALL day. They are not really my style, and by him disregarding this (and my pain), it would insinuate that he doesn't care about me.

Imagine your girlfriend asked you to wear a three piece suit with a tie (or something else that you found uncomfortable/ not your style) every day... how would you feel? Especially if you have told her before that suits/ ties are not your thing. Think genuinely about this. Imagine she said you not accommodating her requests is "killing her". How would YOU feel?

To answer your question, from a female's perspective, no- there is nothing you can do. My boyfriend has bought me plenty of shoes (both heels and flats) over the years, and I wear them when I want. I will not be coerced or pushed into wearing something that I don't want to wear. Heels are uncomfortable and impractical and you are being selfish in trying to find ways to "get her to wear them more often".

kat.mac

lorrha14 wrote: »

Thanks for all the replies and I fully understand all the answer but I mean like the cinema or a lazy Sunday!!

OP, I don't think you are understanding the replies. Your girlfriend will choose to wear them as often as she likes. You really just have to accept this. I'm not sure how any of us can make this any clearer.

Frankly, I, as a woman, would be extremely irritated if my boyfriend wanted or expected me to wear high heels on a "lazy Sunday". Wearing heels would ruin my Sunday. Asking me to ruin my Sunday for his pleasure would actually be kind of a deal breaker.

ElleEm

kat.mac wrote: »

OP, I don't think you are understanding the replies. Your girlfriend will choose to wear them as often as she likes. You really just have to accept this. I'm not sure how any of us can make this any clearer.

Frankly, I, as a woman, would be extremely irritated if my boyfriend wanted or expected me to wear high heels on a "lazy Sunday". Wearing heels would ruin my Sunday. Asking me to ruin my Sunday for his pleasure would actually be kind of a deal breaker.

Exactly! If I wore heels on a Saturday night, you can be feckin' sure I won't be putting them on my feet for another week!
The cinema is a place where people go to relax. They wear comfy clothes. I can't imagine why you would want your girlfriend to wear heels to the cinema!!!

And to be honest, it seems very strange that you've been with this girl "a few years" yet you keep going on about your ex.

ABajaninCork

Put the shoe on the other foot (Excuse the pun!). What do you do to accommodate your GF 24/7?

If you're not prepared to reciprocate, then it is unreasonable to expect her to accommodate you.

IHeartShoes

In the interest of balance, I do wear high heels everyday. To the cinema, shopping, work or wherever I go. Obv I wear trainers to the gym but thats the exception:)

Recently I even hoovered and cleaned my house and only noticed when finished that I was wearing my heels the whole time and must have looked a right twit. Fact is that I find them more comfortable than flat shoes.

But if your GF doesn't find heels comfortable in general then I do not see how she could or should be coerced into wearing them, per the responses above.

S

sffc

Really OP you should lead by example and see if that works. You should wear high heels for as many hours a week as you expect her to wear them. I think it might help YOUR problem

jam_mac_jam

Killing you? This is killing you?

From a another womans perspective I would not be impressed, I wear them to work and I wear them going out. I would not be impressed by being asked to wear them on a Sunday as well. You do know they are damaging to be worn all the time do you? Back problems, pain, bunions, not very sexy at all...

homemadecider

If a guy asked me to wear heels on a 'lazy Sunday' I'd laugh him all the way out the front door.

Sinall

Have you tried asking her? Not being smart here, but you seem to think that if you buy her lots of shoes she'll somehow magically be inspired to wear heels all the time! Be straight-forward about it. Ask her if she would oblige you by wearing them a little bit more. Remember she may not want to - and that's her decision and her right!

You can't make her do it. You can ask her if she would consider it, but it's not going to be all the time and she mightn't feel like it. She does have the right to decide what she puts on her own feet, but she may be happy to do it sometimes for your enjoyment. Remember though, these things are about give and take!

I personally would hate to wear heels on a 'lazy Sunday' - nothing lazy or relaxing about it if you have to totter around the place in 4 inch heels!

DeltaWhite

Heels and Lazy Sunday shouldnt even go in the same sentence OP!

I understand you get a thrill etc. it's not uncommon with men, but if you push your missus to wear them when she doesnt want to she will get p*ssed off for sure! It may be thrilling for you but it's probably a pain in the hole for her!

kylith

I'm with the others, OP. Heels range from uncomfortable to downright painful, and wearing them too much can damage your feet. It is unacceptable to expect your OH to wear them more often than she wants to. I recommend talking to her and seeing if she would be willing to wear them any more than she does, but you will have to be, 100%, happy with however often she chooses to wear them.

And, as others have said, get some heels in your size and see how happy you'd be wearing them for extended periods of time.

dannyc31

you could get yourself an eastern european girlfriend instead, they're never out of heals
but on a serious note, come on man its a relationship you are in not a film and the girl is not your own personal hooker. they are very uncomfortable for women to wear around the clock.

beleive me, i'm with you, i think there is nothing more pretty than seeing a women done up to the nines in a lovely set of high heals but is it not more enjoyable to see her in them on the special nights when you are out on a weekend? gives you something to look forward to when you see her in them. being honest if you seen her in them all the time it would probably get boring and then you'd be focussing on some other fetish you'd develop. it might not just be the heals it possibly is a personality trait of yours.

maybe you could compromise a bit and ask her to maybe wear them on nights out in the town and when in bed for dress up when you're having sex rather than around the clock every day.

Queen-Mise

OK - I am going to go against the female race here

Rather than buying her high heels or high boots. Buy her some clothes that demand high heels to be worn with them. Think about some really beautiful clothes. Very skinny jeans or some beautiful dresses.


And back to the female race now - cinema and Sundays are going to be out for wearing heels especially if she is wearing during the week at work. The cinema is to relax. If you want her to wear heels - then bring her places where heels would be expected like a nice restaurant. Ask her to take up ballroom or salsa dancing with you :D


Is your girlfriend aware how much this means to you? Does she know in black and white that this is a fetish?

OP, thing is that you can't tell her what to do all the time. Foot/shoe fetishes (or any fetish really) can be a touchy subject, especially if the other person isn't that way inclined. By her indulging you at all means that she is doing you a favour. Be happy with that. If you continue to push it, then chances are that it could destroy your relationship - I mean, if anyone tried pushing something like that on me, I would probably walk away.