crazy bout my friend, but dunno what to do

LegacyUser

we are both mature students in college (im older, but both in mid-late twenties). He is just perfect for me. we always hang out together. he does a lot of things for me that i have reason to believe he is into me. i wont go into details, but i have a fair idea he is.
he is very shy when it comes to this kind of thing, and has admitted it before when we were all having a chat one day.
but we have the next practically 4 years together, and if something did happen and it didnt end up well, it would ruin our friendship and make college really awful, and id hate to lose him as a friend cos he is just so great! what do you think??
is it worse not to do anything at all just cos it MIGHTNT work out???
should i ask him out?? not for something really fancy, just something where we'd have a bit of a laugh!
what do you guys think about a girl asking you out??
we really are good friends, and i think we'd be great together but im terrified hed feel awkward around me if he didnt want to! i think the fact we're in college together would be on his mind too!

The_Morrigan

I wouldn't do it OP.
I dated a guy I was friends with for years and it didn't work out and well we can't go back to how it was and I seriously miss him as a friend, nevermind anything else. The friendship is absolutely ruined at this point.

I guess for you the choice you have now is whether you are willing to risk the friendship for the chance of something more and of course, if that risk would be worth it if it didn't work out.

ldxo15wus6fpgm

Definitely go for it.
I had this situation in secondary school and decided not to do anything, and I was kicking myself for years afterwards.
Same situation cropped up in college, took the other path (it didn't end well at all and we haven't said a single word to each other since) but I don't regret it.

cantdecide

I say do it.

Neither of you are kids. You both get on very well. You fancy him and he appears to fancy you back ("he admitted it"). I really don't see a problem as long as you're both mature about it. If it comes to pass, just take things slowly. Only you can decide if he would be turned off by you taking the lead but if he's that shy, he would probably be pleased.

Of course there's a risk to the friendship but a little awkwardness is all that's at stake against a love story.

No brainer, IMO.

crixos30

I think do it I met this girl 11 years ago through friends and we became close friends for 2years then one day while I was fixing her sisters car she asked me out I was shocked but we just went for a quiet drink and cinema ................we're now married and have two beautiful girls together.

kat.mac

I say go for it. Ask him on a date, if it's not what he wants I'm sure he'll be good enough to be tactful and respectful, and ye will be able to continue the friendship - he sounds like a good guy. I'm fully subscribed to the 'nothing ventured, nothing gained' school of thought!