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How can I forgive myself?

  • 07-01-2013 7:23pm
    #1
    HonorRoller
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43 ✭


    It was a long and complicated story. Well i ruined the friendship while at the same time i lost my chance with this girl. It was my fault and I must admit I judged her admittingly it was also out of jealousy. She did nothing wrong with her ex, she and her ex only had oral. I also tried (subconsciously) to try and break them up since I was her 'psychiatrist' and acted as the surrogate boyfriend when her ex doesn't give her the attention she needed. According to her, the guy was 'all over' her since the first date and followed her to the bathroom on the fourth date. I told her he just wants sex but she was too infatuated to see it. When she heard the rumour that her ex scores on every girl he meets, she felt disgusted about it and I know she was angry towards me that I may well have been right (if the rumour was true). I should have realised that I should not be getting involved in her problems from the beginning because in return I also stressed myself out.

    I don't see myself with her anymore because she changed and became bitchy, egocentric and manipulative and I am quite sure my friendship with the girl doesn't exist anymore. I, on the other hand, don't want someone like that. I don't expect that she forgives me but problem is I can't shake the feeling of guilt that I implied she is not worth it. It's not that I thought she is a 'slut' but I called her easy. Well my definition of easy is someone naive but apparently, according to my friend, it is a girl who is being a 'slut'.

    Both of us are 19 and in college and are actually inexperienced. We haven't had a relationship before so both of us are naive in relationships. She is a liberal Pakistani Muslim by the way but her mom sheltered her. Likewise, I am from the same strict Asian background. Both of us have just started seeing the world as they truly are. But nevertheless, whether she is just naive or actually too promiscous in nature, she surprised me and I expected that she should have known that the guy just wanted sex from her right at the beginning. Anyway, I know it's too late to be with her but I can't shake the feeling of guilt that I insulted her womanhood.


Comments

  • #2
    Lorna123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,116 ✭✭✭Lorna123


    If you feel that guilty you could send her an e-mail explaining that you are sorry if you insulted her, that you think she is a fine girl and that you only said the things you said out of jealousy and that you wish her all the best in the future.

    The above is all you need say, nothing more. You will not be getting a reply so don't expect one, but you will have peace of mind after that. Best of Luck.


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