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Feeling so lonely

  • 17-12-2012 9:33pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I'm 22, a girl, and I've only had one boyfriend. It only lasted two moths (almost to the day) and ended almost a year ago. I realise that's not a big deal...although I am in the minority amongst my friends; only one is single at the moment and I'm the only one who has never had a serious relationship. For the most part, so far this has been quite good: I've been able to do my own thing, grow up as myself alone, travel, discover myself, etc.

    However, in the back of my mind I've also been sort of lonely and lately that feeling has moved to the forefront. I've always loved the idea of a boyfriend, since I was like 12. But until I actually had one last year I'd also assumed that it wasn't all it's cracked up to be, like sex and stuff. But it was, it was great...which is saying something because my bf was an awful bf who never wanted to spend time with me, which is why I broke up with him.

    That was last Jan and the loneliness has been steadily growing, despite the fact I've loads of friends and an active social life. it's gotten to the stage where I just can't deal with it. Every time I'm with my friends and they bring up their boyfirends/girlfriends I am filled with what I can only describe as hatred. I feel like there is something wrong with me that I can go out and meet so many great people and none of them have the slightest bit of interest in me. I've lately even started imagining relationships with other women even though I'm straight. I just feel so alone and unloved, and of course, on top of that I feel really f*cking stupid for being so upset about something so stupid, I mean if I'm like this now what will happen if I forty and single?

    There is nothing I would love more than to be able to get over with this on continue with my life. I don't even have time for a boyfriend at the moment anyway! I'm sorry, can anybody help me stop feeling so lonely?


Comments

  • #2
    skyfall2012
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 409 ✭✭skyfall2012


    You are very young, I was 24 when I met my first and last boyfriend, we are married now. But, like you, I use to wonder why everybody else got into relationships so easily, I had traveled a lot and live abroad by the time I was 24 and met no one that I was interested in getting involved with, then when I came home I met my husband. Before that I was sure I was destined to stay on the shelf:) I think people sometimes are in relationships just to be in one, but they are not necessarily good ones. I am sure you will meet someone when you least expect it! Best wishes.


  • #3
    Lorna123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,116 ✭✭✭Lorna123


    Life can be very lonely, I agree with you. I remember lots of lonely times I went through too before I was married. It seems to be harder these days to meet someone special. In my day all you had to do is go to a dance and you were more than likely to meet someone. Today, dances don't seem to be for hitching up at all, just dancing.

    Have you tried online dating. If you google these sites and join them at least you will be pointing in the right direction. There is no guarantee that you will meet the right person on these sites either but at least you might. Give it a go and best of luck.

    Also the more social clubs you join the better chance you have of meeting people.


  • #4
    Buncha Fives
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 145 ✭✭Buncha Fives


    Its strange to read this because i have similar enough feelings at the moment it probably has something to do with the time of the year as well.

    At 22 you are very young to be getting overly concerned about being single but I do agree that it is a very lonely place to find yourself when most of your friends are in relationships. Personally I try and keep myself as active as possible and go out as much as possible which helps take my mind off things but I know that is not the long term answer, I am grand when I am out socialising but when I wake up on a Sunday and I have no one to spend the day with it can be very tough and lonely.

    I think at 22 you will have no problem meeting someone because you have time on your side and you are certainly looking in plenty of time. It is all about timing and hopefully the person that is meant for you will come into your life sooner rather than later.


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