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The Worst Job Spec Ever...

  • 13-12-2012 3:50pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,897 ✭✭✭Kimia


    This shocks me. I can't believe the arrogance of the company that posted this advertisement.

    I love the way the 'personal assistant' to the President needs to know what the President needs or wants before he does.

    http://thedailyedge.thejournal.ie/dalkey-archive-press-713916-Dec2012/


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 55 ✭✭malarkus


    They've already hired; follow @DalkeyIntern on twitter for entertainment!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,034 ✭✭✭Ficheall


    Kimia wrote: »
    This shocks me. I can't believe the arrogance of the company that posted this advertisement.

    I love the way the 'personal assistant' to the President needs to know what the President needs or wants before he does.

    http://thedailyedge.thejournal.ie/dalkey-archive-press-713916-Dec2012/

    I think they may be looking for employees with a sense of humour...


  • Posts: 0 CMod ✭✭✭✭ Nehemiah Tasty Rehabilitation


    I love the responses :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,897 ✭✭✭Kimia


    I know - it was a clever way for them to get some positive publicity about Portnoy.

    To the guy who thinks it's a joke - apply and let us know! heehee


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 27,349 ✭✭✭✭super_furry


    Seems like a publicity stunt.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,013 ✭✭✭kincsem


    Many a true word is said in jest.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,897 ✭✭✭Kimia


    Seems like a publicity stunt.

    it's on their website in the 'employment' section..

    I fear it isn't.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,603 ✭✭✭Mal-Adjusted


    The whole tongue-in-cheek comment looks to be damage control...


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,203 ✭✭✭sfwcork


    what if i need to go Poo during the day?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,772 ✭✭✭byronbay2


    The whole tongue-in-cheek comment looks to be damage control...
    Agreed. Rather than look like a complete and total arsehole, your man is pretending "ah sure, it was only a joke". I have a friend who is famous for using this tactic when he says something remedial.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,513 ✭✭✭Ray Palmer


    At least it is in the description. I worked a job where the boss treated everybody like that. When mobile phones were newish he abused the fact people had them. Ringing randomly about work anytime. When people complained he said " don't have a mobile if you don't want to get calls"
    A few months later he started to complain people didn't have mobiles and he couldn't reach them out of work hours.
    He rang me at 3 am once to tell me he booked me on a flight leaving at 7 am. I had the day off and when I told him he said it had just been cancelled. I didn't get the flight and he rang me all day looking for me.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,438 ✭✭✭✭El Guapo!


    sfwcork wrote: »
    what if i need to go Poo during the day?

    Well you damn well better shít yourself at your desk. And it better not smell either.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,277 ✭✭✭happyoutscan


    They're looking for a slave.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 129 ✭✭AnarchistKen


    What a complete bunch of tossers of employers. Shame on them writing a spec like that.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,571 ✭✭✭newmug


    In my last job, part of the spec was "must be willing to take personal criticism".

    I was so screwed by that job. Never again.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,750 ✭✭✭iDave


    William Wilberforce turned in his grave


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,704 ✭✭✭squod


    Dalkey Archive Press? Never heard of them. Best (most appropriate) anagram I've seen in ages.

    Dalkey Archive Press

    Crap evil eyed sharks


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,620 ✭✭✭blue note


    This is sadly a reality in some industries. I lived with a girl studying multimedia in college. Her course had 6 months work placement.

    One of the other girls in her course worked for 6 months (unpaid), brought in 2 cakes for the office on her last day to say thanks and was given a €25 golden discs voucher. At least she got some relevant experience (and they got a free worker), but a €25 voucher is very insulting for 6 months work.

    The girl I lived with worked with a media company unpaid as a "runner". She brought home her daily schedule to me one day - there was nothing relevant to her course on it. It consisted of wiping down surfaces, making sure there was toilet paper and soap in the bathrooms, making tea / coffee, taking lunch orders and confirming them before going to get them. Criticisms leveled at her included not setting the coffee grinder to a fine enough setting (I can't remember any others, but they were equally ridiculous). She worked there for a month and asked them if they could give her any work involving computers but she got none. She photocopied her daily schedule and showed it to the university. The University got back to her to say that they had been sending people there for years and no-one else ever complained about it (even though she showed them her entire daily schedule which showed her as a cleaner / skivvy). The company she was working for said that they didn't have any spare computers for her to use, but offered to let her stay late and use them after hours, which she did a few times but it was meaningless when she had nothing to do on them. Eventually, they allowed her to look for another job - she got one and finished her placement there.

    But the point is, this sort of thing is normal in many industries.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,070 ✭✭✭✭My name is URL


    I definitely thought it sounded a bit satirical when first reading it. Even if it's not... how many people would apply for the job believing it was genuine?

    The fact it's considered as news is the most astounding thing imo.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 794 ✭✭✭bluecode


    At least they're upfront about it. So the person who gets the 'job' knows exactly where they stand.

    I've seen that kind of thing several times. I know a boss like that. He complains that people have private lives and want time off. But he took the biscuit when he tried to hire someone to work in a complex, risky job for long hours. To be available seven days a week. To move away from his pregnant girlfriend and live near the job. Oh and the pay: There wasn't any. He tried to sell it to him by explaining that the experience he was giving him was worth tens of thousands. So in fact he was doing him a favour. :rolleyes: In then end. He had to pay him something but the rest was still true.

    I'm not joking either. Add that to the fact that he is a complete and utter selfish *****.

    As the labour market tightens. We'll see more of this. Scrooge is probably based on fact.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,030 ✭✭✭✭Chuck Stone


    That's job would be the embodiment of wage slavery.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 39,022 ✭✭✭✭Permabear


    This post has been deleted.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,772 ✭✭✭byronbay2


    Permabear wrote: »
    This post had been deleted.
    Don't agree with this at all. Surely you mean "Every busy self-employed professional .." The new-fangled idea (since the advent of the mobile phone) that company employees should be available to work 24/7 to advance their careers is nothing short of exploitation in my opinion.
    I know it's off-topic but there is an interesting argument about whether the arrival of mobile phones has improved our lives or not - I tend to believe the latter. Are we (mankind) becoming more or less happy??


  • Site Banned Posts: 29 Nailin4Whales


    Permabear wrote: »
    This post had been deleted.

    Christ almighty and the 4 saints if you're ever placing an ad for a job could you please put your boards username under it so I know not to bother. I suppose you think the Budget wasn't harsh enough and are a real sucker for punishment yourself


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 39,022 ✭✭✭✭Permabear


    This post has been deleted.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,001 ✭✭✭Mr. Loverman


    Reminds me of the job spec you see if you search for "blow job" on dublinjobs.ie


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Permabear wrote: »
    This post had been deleted.

    That comparison is only relevant if you're being remunerated to the same extent as those individuals


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,772 ✭✭✭byronbay2


    Permabear wrote: »
    This post had been deleted.

    I have no problem working outside office hours occasionally, if the situation demands, but I see many companies (not mine) implying to their employees that they have to work evenings and weekends if they want to have any future with the company. The other new tactic employed by unscrupulous employers is to give staff a workload that can't be completed in a 40-hour week. These ploys deliberately foster an aggressively competitive working environment where 60 hours work per week is not enough because Jimmy and Johnny are doing 70 etc.
    Obviously, being a Master Of The Universe on a seven-figure salary with the fate of billions of dollars hovering at your fingertip is a rather different scenario. Many employees would happily accept a very long and stressful working week if it came with a huge salary that secured their families for life. However, this scenario is a long way removed from Ireland 2012 where ordinary working slobs on €40-50K (in the private sector, of course) or less are working continual 60-70 hour weeks just to stand still with their employers. It's a sad state of affairs and is only getting worse. The jobs market is cut-throat now with employers holding all the cards - if you don't work your arse off to the exclusion of everything else in your life, well, there's plenty more that will etc.
    Please note: I am not a communist.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 39,022 ✭✭✭✭Permabear


    This post has been deleted.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 39,022 ✭✭✭✭Permabear


    This post has been deleted.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,772 ✭✭✭byronbay2


    Permabear wrote: »
    This post had been deleted.

    I'm going to have one last stab at this: "Slackers" and "lazy ne'er-do-wells" who spend half the day on Facebook/Boards and the other half making personal phonecalls are one thing; diligent employees who work hard and efficiently for 40 hours per week but want to have a separate family life outside of this time are a different matter. The former should be fired, the latter appreciated for their efforts and not denigrated as somehow "not going the extra mile".


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,073 ✭✭✭Pottler


    sfwcork wrote: »
    what if i need to go Poo during the day?
    pooing is for wooses.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,815 ✭✭✭imitation


    Permabear wrote: »
    This post had been deleted.

    Yeah but its a terrible approach, look at large multinationals, in general they do the exact opposite approach, for good reason, because it will attract talent, and that talent will feel appreciated and will be willing to take outside hours phone calls and all the rest of the jazz when needed.

    What skilled person is going to look at that ad and think that they will be valued and not treated like a drudge. Anybody who has been out working for a few years will see all the signs that the ad isn't very tongue in cheek.

    I guess we should be thankful really that they posted the position like this, rather than the usual honeyed promises followed by a swift kick in the balls when you actually get the job and its completely different.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,586 ✭✭✭sock puppet


    blue note wrote: »
    This is sadly a reality in some industries. I lived with a girl studying multimedia in college. Her course had 6 months work placement.

    Yeah anyone I know who did an internship in media/advertising/fashion etc was unpaid. They also seem like really difficult industries to break into. Finance and IT are much better in that aspect, and every internship I know is fully paid. You can be very confident of getting a job afterwards as well.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,962 ✭✭✭CelticRambler


    byronbay2 wrote: »
    The other new tactic employed by unscrupulous employers is to give staff a workload that can't be completed in a 40-hour week. These ploys deliberately foster an aggressively competitive working environment where 60 hours work per week is not enough because Jimmy and Johnny are doing 70 etc.

    Ahhh, that'd be nice - to cut down to only 70hrs a week working for an unscrupulous employer and get paid too. Maybe I'll give up this self-employed lark. :cool:


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  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Permabear wrote: »
    This post had been deleted.

    Oh ok, you meant as they were climbing the ladder. I took it to mean in their current capacity.

    Still though, not everyone wants to be at the top.


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