Should I see her? Advice/opinions appreciated!

LegacyUser

Hello and thank you for reading this Before I go on, this is a long read, and is 100% genuine and serious, not a troll thread at all so I would very much appreciate it anyone could read it and and give me their view/opinion. Thank you

I am a 21 year old male, virgin and never been kissed. Yes I know, quite pathetic, but please keep reading. I don't consider myself anti social or in any way not able to function socially, I am quite confident in talking to people, making small talk fitting in etc, I think I am fine-reasonably good at that, it's just when it comes to the opposite sex I have 0 EXPERIENCE and I flop big time. I've never been with a girl or had any girl ever show any interest in me, never got intimate or had anyone say they liked me etc

As a 21 year old, this feels terrible, disheartening, makes me feel like I am not a man, etc I am currently unemployed (but have my CAO filled out and hope to go to Uni next year with my LC results), currently seeking work and trying to keep active as much as I can to try not get down too much over my current situation.

My problem begins cause of my image. I think I am ugly. Very. I am a little overweight, not huge fat but chubby I guess, hinders my ability to be as attractive as I think/know I am, makes me feel terrible, gives me no confidence, I feel invisible to people, especially the opposite sex I get very down about this and it's the only real thing I have in my life that I hate, makes me feel terrible, ruins life, kills all my good feelings etc. I'm confident, quite, good talker etc, think I'm funny, but when it boils down to it, and when push comes to shove with opposite sex, I'm not confident, at all

You're probably wondering why I called this thread what I did, well, because, in all of my time on this earth a girl has finally shown interest in me, and I'm kind of scared. Please let me explain the situation, this girl is 19 years old, and we met totally randomly online, we got talking and I got to really like her. I was going to tell her one day (and expect to get friendzoned like I did with every other girl!), but lo and behold she comes out and tells me SHE likes me, before I even got a chance, so of course I was blown away by this, I told her how I felt and what have you.

So what's the catch? She lives in England. So we spoke for the coming months, everything was great, had our ups and downs, but generally I feel like this girl really likes me, she's expressed it on a few occasions and I'm pretty damn sure she's v interested. So, I asked would she be interested in meeting up for a day/weekend soon? I didn't ask her out, of course, cause of distance, I just asked did she want to hang out and maybe spend time together, nothing heavy, just spend time together, see how it goes. She said yes and that she'd love to, and she also added that the only reason she isn't going out with me or asking me out is cause of the distance, and she'd like to meet first or a few times to see how we click and see how it goes, which I agree with 100%

She's said she loves my personality, make her laugh and smile, there for her when she's sad, show interest, nice caring lovely and fun etc, is this rly enough to make up for my bad looks? Are my personality traits really enough to overshadow my bad looks, especially to a girl like her? She's really pretty and could have any guy at all...why has she chosen me? I'm happy but, seems a bit too good to be true?

So why am I posting this? I'm scared. We chat quite a bit, we're close, but that's just that..chatting. Texting etc. I wouldn't feel comfortable meeting her just on that basis. The girl is extremely shy, she has no computer/laptop so we cannot cam, I've only cammed her twice when she went to her Granny's house, both times were very short and somewhat lacking because she is so shy she muted her microphone, and didn't really do much apart from laugh and smile when I made her. So I am kinda scared because, I've never heard this girl's voice, nor have I had a chance to see her body language properly, see her, etc etc, no face to face has taken place...which is kinda nerve rattling to me, the girl is shy and I've asked her could we have phone calls (which i'd pay for, given she is a student), starting off simple and work up as we go, to get to know each other a bit better and just hear each other, settle in a bit more, ease the tension when we meet etc. She's been reluctant AGAIN on doing this, which I'm kinda finding it hard to deal with/take

Also, second reason I'm scared. This girl is a drop dead gorgeous ten out of ten (to me anyway). She's a real beauty in my eyes and I'm kinda dumbfounded she likes me. So lately I've convinced myself it's not true, given the whole "if something is too good to be true, it probably is". My main logic seems to be, if I am a kissless virgin at 21, who has no exp with girls and no girl has ever touched, or shown interest in me, why would this girl, a girl like her, like me? Why choose me? She could have anyone? Which is why I believe if she knew how I was chubby/fat, she'd feel different, she wouldn't like me anymore When I take pictures of myself or webcam her (when I did), I tend to look very flattering with how I take pics, and look on cam, so I'm scared she has made a decision that she likes my looks, but, from looking at me from flattering ways. I've explained I think I'm fat etc to her, and she's always said back "your looks don't matter to me" "you're fine, looks don't matter!". Is this true? or is this just a nice gesture? Because she's never really seen my body, just my face, and I am quite chubby etc, so I'm scared.

I don't want to travel to see this girl, when I'm not 100% sure she's seen all of me, she says I'm good looking etc, but the pics were a teny bit flattering of me, and she's not seen my body...my chubbiness. I don't want her to be disappointed. Imagine travelling to see her, only to find she seems me and suddenly then doesn't like me...awkward much? Secondly, I don't want to meet if I haven't spoken to her/had more 1on1 contct like webcam etc, it will be awkward for me and for her, I'm good at talking etc, but I just think it will be odd...given we text loads but have never kind of..spent "time" together or spoken to each other...I'm not very good with the opposite sex and I don't want to **** it up, make it awkward, I'm really nervous but I reallly like this girl and I don't want to let it pass by, I wanna try it out, see how it goes :)I 'm scared she will see me and not like me, her feelings will change, and she'll find some excuse to leave and I've just blown how much money on going to see her to get stood up...any advice is appreciated