Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Bad News

  • 29-10-2012 10:37pm
    #1
    coldfire1x
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,356 ✭✭✭


    The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, 'Hello.'
    'Mrs. Sanders, please.''Speaking.'

    'Mrs. Sanders, this is Doctor Jones at Saint Agnes Laboratory. When your husband's doctor sent his biopsy to the lab last week, a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well. We are now uncertain which one belongs to your husband. Frankly, either way the results are not too good.'

    'What do you mean?' Mrs. Sanders asks nervously.
    'Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for HIV. We can't tell which is which.'

    'That's dreadful! Can you do the test again?' questioned Mrs. Sanders.
    'Normally we can, but Medicare will only pay for these expensive tests one time.'
    'Well, what am I supposed to do now?'

    'The folks at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him.

    Yesterday I had a flat tire on the highway, so I eased my car over to the shoulder of the road, carefully got out of the car and opened the trunk.

    I took out two cardboard men, unfolded them and stood them at the rear of my car facing oncoming traffic. They look so life-like you wouldn't believe it! They are in trench coats, exposing their nude bodies and private parts to the approaching drivers.

    I started to change my tire, and to my surprise, cars started slowing down looking at my life-like men. And of course, traffic started backing up. Everybody was tooting their horns and waving like crazy.

    It wasn't long before an OPP pulled up behind me. He got out of his car and started walking towards me. I could tell he was not a happy camper! "What's going on here?"

    "My car has a flat tire," I said calmly.

    "Well, what the hell are those obscene cardboard men doing here by the road?"
    I told him, "Hello-o-o-o, those are my emergency flashers."


Advertisement