Can't get over Ex - but I'm married

mishca

Hope you dont mind me posting on this thread. Im fairly new to Boards but I felt I needed to comment on here. I can see OP that you still care deeply for this person and are not ready to remove him completely from your life until you get closure. I know exactly how you feel as I was with someone similiar to that and we parted a long time ago, I then went on and married and had kids but this man came back into my life through Facebook last year and ever since I cannot get him out of my mind. He possesses every thought of every minute of my day. He was always the love of my life and to be honest I never loved my husband and shouldnt have married him, but I did all of this and feel so bad now. I never got any closure when I split with this man who was and still is the love of my life and believe me it has come back to bit me in the backside! I know now where he lives but cant bring myself to go there in the hope of meeting him. Last year I ended up on meds because of how I feel about him, and feel like I am heading down the same path now again. I need closure but am so bloody scared that when I meet him that my heart will melt again for him and I wont want to leave. However if I dont meet him and end it all again then I will live forever like I am now. If you feel you need to get answers and put this to bed then please do for your own sanity as it wont go away. Believe me I know as it has stayed with me for all these years and still haunts me today

Ellsbells

It you don't know this person any more??? People change and he may be entirely different to your memories of him. The issue here is your relationship with your husband. As you know you should not have married someone you don't love. It's not fair to him.

mishca

I know he may be totally different to how I remember him, and I have been told that he has aged a lot and that time and drink etc has not been kind to him physically, but its the person I knew inside that I love. Im just too scared to go looking for him in case it dosent work out well, but I cant understand why he got in touch again and told me he loved me still etc. He was so loving and caring to begin with but then his messages all talked about sex and that is all he can offer now he says.

I know I shouldnt have married my husband and I never wanted to but we had kids and I felt pressured into it. I cant walk out on him I have no where to go but I cant also go on like this. I am so depressed I feel there is only one option for me, which I know is selfish but I think my husband and kids would be better off without me as I cant be what they need. I need to be with my ex but that dosent seem to be going to happen

Taltos

OP - apologies but we are not permitted to allow threads where suicide is indicated or even hinted at.

Please go and see your GP immediately or use some of the resources available at the end of our charter.

Pick up the phone today and get the help you need.

Taltos