Really very very shy

LegacyUser

I have a litle issue here people and I was wondering if I could get some opinions on it..


Do women find men that are shy a turn off? It's just I am extremely shy when it comes to dealing with women. There was a girl I knew that was very flirty with me, problem is anytime i seen her and spoke to her I would go red as a tomato and start laughing like a 6 year old. I aint seen this particular girl in a few weeks but I really hope I didnt frighten her off..

Even the other night I piced up an ex and a few of her friends and they began talkin about sex (kinda messin around) and again I started laughin and going all colours. My ex and her friends found it adorable but i'm kinda worried others will find it a turn off? and is there any particular way of controlling myself?

Roisy7

How old are you OP? Do you have any sisters, or go to a mixed school?

Look obv you don't have a massive problem with picking up women if you have an ex It might take you a while to get used to banter around the opposite sex, and tbh if my ex was in a car with me talking about sex with their friends I'd prob go red too!

As for whether girls like shy guys, it depends. Some do, some don't. Some girls might feel that shy guys are more genuine. So I wouldn't worry overly, just be yourself and take a deep breath the next time you see a girl you like.

LegacyUser

Hey OP, I'm a girl and also pretty shy when it comes to guys

I personally wouldn't find shyness a turn off, I find it quite endearing in a guy, but in saying that the bit that would be a pretty massive turn off for me would be this:

they began talkin about sex (kinda messin around) and again I started laughin and going all colours. My ex and her friends found it adorable but i'm kinda worried others will find it a turn off?

I think when it comes to sex (and I can only speak for myself) I'd find a guy not being able to talk about sex, or being embarrassed by the topic a HUGE turn off being blunt. I mean I presume you'd had sex with your ex, so why would you be embarrassed? It just kinda comes across as the old catholic guilt thing/prudishness or seeing sex as dirty and shameful. I wouldn't really be able to see you as a 'sexual partner' for want of a better word, like you'd be too timid to be 'sexual' and personally as a woman (again can only speak for me) I wouldn't really want to be with a guy who was really bashful and reserved in the bedroom department.

I guess it's about balance OP, I'm shy as I've said but once I get to know someone I like I come out of my shell and will flirt with them and not afraid to show them I'm interested, and show them a darker side to me

I guess there's 2 types of shy -you can be shy and still have a certain kind of sexy dark mysteriousness about you, or you can be shy and have a nervous, placid, timidness about you. The former is hugely attractive, the latter is kind of friend zone territory.

is there any particular way of controlling myself?

I guess maybe take a look at why you are so embarrassed/reserved talking about sex, and try get over that embarrassment as that for most women I'd imagine would be the biggest turn off, the other shyness stuff is generally endearing and I wouldn't worry too much about it

Overheal

One man's shyness is another's boyish charm.

boomtown123

Depends how shy you are. I'd imagine you aren't "painfully shy" if you've an ex - and your picking her and her friends up.

I find guys a turn off when they're so shy its like pulling teeth trying to make conversation.

If your just "shy shy", I think its cute. I'm quiet shy myself - but once I get to know a person and they get to know me - I'm the opposite. :pac:

LegacyUser

Roisy7 wrote: »

How old are you OP? Do you have any sisters, or go to a mixed school?

i'm 20, Being honest I dont have contact with many women really, I suppose thats where the shyness comes from?

Roisy7

shyguyy wrote: »

i'm 20, Being honest I dont have contact with many women really, I suppose thats where the shyness comes from?

It's definitely a factor, I went to an all-girls school, primary and secondary, and I have no brothers, so I was very shy around men and boys when I was younger. It's not natural the way the sexes are segregated in our society, it makes us view the opposite sex as total aliens!

Sir Pompous Righteousness

Honestly, I think some girls might find shyness kind of cute.

Overheal

Sir Pompous Righteousness wrote: »

Honestly, I think some girls might find shyness kind of cute.

Theory has been tested and proven a few times