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Seperation and Toddler

  • 17-09-2012 10:36pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18


    Myself and my partner seperated a few months ago. My daughter is 14 months now. I want to do write by her and I want her to have a good relationship with her dad but I feel she is too young for sleepovers and she needs her mama. I have been letting her stay over with her dad however she comes back irritated and for the next few nights wakes up a few times when she normally sleeps all night.
    Does anyone know or have suggestions
    The other thing I am concered is my child meeting my exs new gf - I think she is too young and would find it confusing
    Please I really need advice - I don't want to be sending my baby away when she wants to be home and I don't want her having issues now or later in life


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,386 ✭✭✭another question


    This is a tough one but firstly it must be very confusing for her at 14months to be staying over at another house. She is way to young for that. Let him make it his priority to see her as much as possible without upsetting her nightime routine, no wonder shes irritable when she comes back, she has no comprehension of why she is moving around and as for the new gf I think that her presence around the child should be kept to a minimum, its just another person she doesn't know.

    If you are in no way restricting the father's access to seeing his daughter then leave it up to him but in my opinion it is not in your daughters best interests to be moving over and back from house to house, its very unsettling for a child.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 309 ✭✭haulagebasher


    snipped by mod


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 23,862 ✭✭✭✭January


    haulagebasher, please read the OP properly before replying. The child would be staying with her father not a stranger. We won't tolerate scaremongering like that here. This is your first warning.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 309 ✭✭haulagebasher


    Fair enough. Yeah I know its' the father. But I suppose it all depends on how trustworthy the father is. If the OP has confidence in him I suppose but if he as a girlfriend hanging around the house the OP might be well advised to suss her out first to see what she like.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 23,862 ✭✭✭✭January


    Maybe you could let the father stay at your place with the child one or two nights a week? That way she gets used to him having her overnight but in the comfort of her own home where she won't be too unsettled. I know it's not conventional and you both might scoff at it at first but eventually she'll have to get used to overnights with her dad in his own home.

    With the girlfriend thing, I'd have to be sure that they were planning on being together long term before I'd agree to her being introduced to your daughter. If she's only going to be with him a few months that would probably only end up upsetting your daughter having someone come into her life and disappear again just like that.


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