Self conscious exerciser

LegacyUser

Hi,

Just looking for some advice on this. I'm in my late 20s, female, and about a size 12. I suffer from stress and I wanted to start exercising because I think it will make me feel better. The problem is I get really self conscious, for example I tried swimming recently and I just didn't keep it up because I felt like everyone in the pool was looking at me. I also tried to take up running but I feel really self conscious even leaving the house. Its not necessarily about my weight, I know I'm not overweight (technically anyway) but I still feeling cripplingly self-conscious about exercising. I can't quite explain it I just always feel really embarrassed and its stopping me from committing to it fully

I can't try any team sports at the moment because I can't commit to any set times, my job has varying hours.

Anyone have any advice on how to deal with this or do I just have to get over it?

Thanks.

iCosmopolis

Would you be more comfortable in an all female environment, or is it in front of anyone, or a number of people?
If you'd feel better in an all female, there's a lot of women only bootcamps, yoga or pilates out there. If it's about groups in general can you afford a PT?

jessiejam

I used to feel the same op until i got out there and saw other people doing it too. No one takes any notice. There are so many people out there doing it now no one will judge. At a size 12 especially. Your tiny!. The one hint I will give you is bring your ipod with you and put it on up loud with your favourite music on. It takes you away from your surroundings and you can go off into your own world.

Start off walking.. even bring a friend at the start and familiarise yourself with your route. Soon you will feel better about it and will be delighted with the benefits.

If I can do it anyone can.. believe me....

blatantrereg

It's possible it is actually down to the places you're going to. Some places are populated by people concerned about image to some extent, and they would make lots of people feel that way. Other places are the opposite.

I think a lot of people feel self-conscious when they start exercising or return to it after a time, even if they are in pretty good shape. It might pass if you dont fixate on it.

You might find yourself more comfortable running in a park or cycling or the like. Even though you might be more exposed doing things like that, the sense of people comparing each other and things isn't in those sorts of environments.

You could just exercise at home too. Speed ropes are great for example.

Richard Hillman

I started jogging last year. I was a bit self conscious because i was very unfit and the park beside me is usually full of joggers. I didnt want them to be looking at me starting and stopping constantly. I decided to start jogging at night and would recommend it for yourself if you feel the need to. Its getting darker earlier so it wont be too bad. Instead of the pathway (where everyone jogs) i jogged around a football patch just away from the pathway. So i was away from everyone (even thought there was nobody around) and was able to go at my own pace. Plus its better for your knees and feet.

Eventually i got fitter and started jogging during the day but still keep to the pitch just away.

Stavro Mueller

I just thought I'd mention that I've used a few different gyms down the years. They suit me best because of my sometimes odd working hours - I can walk in whenever I want. In each and every one of them, there have always been people of all ages, shapes and sizes working out. Honestly, nobody gives a rat's arse who else is in there because they're too busy wrapped up in their own routines.

R.D. aka MR.D

Honestly op I mean this in the nicest way: the world doesn't revolve around you. No one cares what you look like exercising only you.

As some one who went from not being able to run 10ft to doing 10k+ I can tell you that no one is looking at you. They are so self involved in what they are doing you are only a passing image.

blatantrereg

Richard Hillman wrote: »

I started jogging last year. I was a bit self conscious because i was very unfit and the park beside me is usually full of joggers. I didnt want them to be looking at me starting and stopping constantly. I decided to start jogging at night and would recommend it for yourself if you feel the need to. Its getting darker earlier so it wont be too bad. Instead of the pathway (where everyone jogs) i jogged around a football patch just away from the pathway. So i was away from everyone (even thought there was nobody around) and was able to go at my own pace. Plus its better for your knees and feet.

Eventually i got fitter and started jogging during the day but still keep to the pitch just away.

Jogging around pitches at night alone is not a good idea if you're female tbh.

AnonoBoy

Get an exercise bike or a threadmill and start in your own home. Then build up your confidence alone before heading out into the world.

LegacyUser

OP, is this your first time doing running or swimming "seriously", ie not just splashing around at the beach or running because you were made to at school or whatever? I ask because I can really identify with your experience. I decided at different times in my life to start both running and swimming *seriously* and was very self-conscious because I felt like an uncoordinated, clumsy beginner! Like you, I felt embarrassed even leaving the house in my running gear, like people would laugh and say to themselves "Look at her. Does she really think she's a REAL runner? She's not fooling anyone." FTR I was a skinny 25-year-old with no body image issues. I just felt like everyone could tell by looking I had the coordination of a bowl of noodles. I didn't keep at either sport for long.

BUT! Regarding the running -- are you running in a public park/street or in a gym? When I started running I was doing it on a treadmill in a gym (not a hard-body gym - this one was popular with middle-aged housewives) and didn't feel self-conscious at all, ever. However, my circumstances changed and I had to start running in the park, and it was shocking how self-conscious I suddenly was when all the serious joggers and normals (who might also be serious joggers in disguise, the horror!) could see me!

My main form of exercise now (I'm in my early 30s now) is a local mixed-level yoga class. There are people who are in better shape than me but there are also a lot who are older and/or in not-so-great shape. I've never felt self-conscious, even when I fall on my arse, because it's a very easy-going atmosphere, and a good yoga instructor will cultivate an atmosphere of non-competitiveness and acceptance of your limits. Also, if your main reason for exercising is stress management, you may find yoga helps a lot with that too.

Takeaway 1: Try not to take exercise too seriously.

Takeaway 2: If you exercise among people who are in worse shape and a lot older than you you probably won't feel self-conscious

kjl

Hi OP,

Everyone feels a little self conscience when they start exercising, but it soon passes. You need to stop worrying about what other people think of you because 99 times out of 100 they won't even notice you. In about 2 months you will feel amazing and will welcome people looking at you.

So in the mean time chin up, stop worrying and keep up the exercise, it will make you feel much better long run

Honey-ec

blatantrereg wrote: »

Jogging around pitches at night alone is not a good idea if you're female tbh.

It really depends on the area. I've jogged around my local football pitch at night for years, it's perfectly safe.

username123

Yeah its normal isnt it? To feel a bit self conscious doing a new thing? I felt self conscious when I first started swimming, not for how my body looked but for how bad I was at swimming! I was constantly afraid that I was getting in the way of 'proper' swimmers. After a while you get used to the newness and you get a bit better at the activity and you forget it.

I was self conscious jogging at first as well, again mostly because I looked so ungainly and awkward and sweaty and out of shape, so I bought some proper running gear and when I showed up looking like a proper jogger I felt less self conscious - fake it til you make it~!~

Sala

OP, it is all in your head seriously. I know because I felt the same, starting the counch to 5k I felt like an eejit when I would stop and start passing the "serious" joggers. Now I'm (slowly )jogging 20 minutes and I couldn't care less. I pass people practically running for the olympics and others (in top of the range running gear) just walking fast, everyone is doing their own thing and no one is judging you. Think about it, why would they?? What is the worst they can think, that you're not a good jogger? I was in a gym for a while and was very self-conscious at first, but you quickly realise not everyone is superfit and superbuff, most are just like us (that's why we're there!). A very large man joined and spent a lot of time walking on the treadmill, every single time I went he was there and when I finished my workout he was still there and my only thoughts about him were fair play to him, his dedication was amazing. I know you are not overweight, I just told that story to show if people notice you at all they are likely to think positive things.