Quitting work

LegacyUser

I'm just looking a bit of advice and I hope I'm posting in the right forum.

For the past five years, I've been doing a job that I hate. It was only ever meant as a short term option until I got something better, but that hasn't happened. I've been for two interviews this year, but each time I just fell apart, as my confidence is just shot and my esteem is the lowest I've ever been.

The people I work with and the job itself is not the problem - I've just grown out of it. But after 5 years, I still haven't managed to escape from it and I'm wondering if I ever will.

It's badly affecting my mental health and my drinking has spiralled out of control (I realise these are connected) but I feel trapped and demoralised. I've missed a fair bit of work through depression as well.

I know it's a risk, but I've decided to leave. I can't continue like this. I know it would be better if I'd something else lined up, but after 5 years, that still hasn't happened.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation to this, and if so, what did you do?

LegacyUser

I would not resign from your job in the present climate. If you leave your job you will have to wait at least 9 weeks before claiming benefit.
Also if you leave your present job and go for an interview they will ask you why did you leave your job. Do you say it was a boring job that I hated ect - they could think you will be someone who is hard to work with or not be a team player. Also your ex boss may not give you a great reference in this case.
At this stage you should think about where you see yourself in the next 6 to 12 months. If you want to change job are your skills up to date for the type of job you want to move to. You should look into some night course you could do or see if you can get involved with any new groups or organisations to met new people. At the moment you could be going to work, coming home and drinking which is not helping you. You need to see that your life is more than the job you are not happy in.
A few years ago one of my friends was in a similar position to you. They did a few night courses where they got new skills and met new people. Within a few months they got a better job and the course helped them to do this. It can get better for you but you have stay in your present job until you get a new job and stop drinking as it is only making things worse for you. Good Luck.

Mrs OBumble

JJMartin wrote: »

I've missed a fair bit of work through depression as well.

You must be involved with a doctor. What does s/he think of your decision?

Would a longer term period of sick leave be a better idea, that way you would be eligible for a benefit, rather than being 9 weeks without any income.

Also, what other sort of job do you want? It's no good hoping for "anything" (which really means nothing at all), you need to set a concrete goal for something specific, and then work out what you need to do (in week-by-week steps) to be ready for that. Ironically, if you follow this approach, you may end up with something that's quite different from your goal - but having the goal makes your actions concrete/real, which affects things happening.

LegacyUser

People have to stop assuming things. You will get benefit as work was affecting your mental health. I was in similar position a couple of years ago. The SWO told me you will only be disqualified for up to 9 weeks if you just quit work for no reason. If work is making your life hell, there is no reason to stay there.

I went back to college doing something I always wanted to do but was afraid to. I am extremely happy now even though my income has been slashed 300%. Make sure you know what you want to do. You have to have a plan in place and the road is hard. I sometimes feel a little regret for leaving my job only out of fear. Do think about it carefully. I took time off sick to reflect before I made up my decision. Only you can do that. Good luck.

Mrs OBumble

Sameposition wrote: »

People have to stop assuming things. You will get benefit as work was affecting your mental health.

You're assuming too.

It depends on the policies the local welfare office applies, but unless he has a doctor's sign off, it's quite possible that he won't get benefit. And what I'm suggesting is that it could be wise to talk to the doctor before rather than after quitting: suddenly having a large amount of free time in the day may not actually be in the OPs best interests, and only a professional can help him/her assess that.

MeWantBroadband

Work on your interview technique - do a course if necessary. Get a job offer.

LegacyUser

Thanks folks for taking the time to reply.

In terms of doctors advice and CBT therapist , he has said it's best to have a structure to the day, to be
getting up in the morning. I understand and relate to this, but it's the going and doing
the job that's causing the problem. On the other hand, not having anything to do
is going to cause problems as well. It's a bit of a catch-22.

Ideally I would have something else lined up. I've been doing a bit of freelance
work on the side but haven't been able to build it to a sustainable level, yet. I've
done an evening course as well. I'm mentally drained in the evenings which makes
it difficult but I have been trying.

I feel guilty about going off on the sick. The last time, it was for 6 months, which
came about after a half hearted cry for help. My workload falls onto other people
in the office when I'm off, which I feel guilty about.

I understand the concern about quitting the job in the present climate, but I've
been on a one year rolling contract every year for the past 5 years with no sign
of permanency. Which I wouldn't want anyway. I'm not particularly good at the
job either. I don't have a mortgage or dependents so that's not a worry.