i need help, Would this be counted as sexual abuse

EducationFinder

This is the only and last time I am telling this story to anyone, but I do need advice.
Hi, when I was 7 I didn't live with my parent but with my cousins. I were only 7 and well there wasn't much to do but my cousin who was I think two years older than me love to explore her body.
She decided to expolore mine one day and I didn't really mind cause it felt good, so that was my first sexual encounter at the age of 7
Then while I was still 7 a bar tender at my uncles hotel took a liking to me and started touching me but not enough because before anything could happen I was brought to ireland.
Even long before that I have always had a love for acting sexual and inapproiate but never acted out on it, never acted on in front of people.
My next sexually in encounter was when I was 9 with another girl.

Now my problem is now that I am old enough to get a boyfriend and had intercourse I rather not.

I hate being touched
But love teasing people
I love the idea of sex with someone eles but would never want to go there.
People like me usually end up in the porn industry or worst or end up extermly unhappy and I don't want that at all.
I don't have a health out look toward sex at all, I mean am a person that feel good being watch take off my clothes I love watch others get off on my body... I need help but I don't want to talk about it anymore I want to help myself how can I ?
Any advice expect see a pro would be great!!1?

Taltos

OP as much as I would like to leave your thread open to get advice from the folk on here the best thing we can do is close this thread and strongly recommend you seek professional help. Unfortunately no-one here is qualified in our anonymity to help you.

Hope you understand but this is really in your best interests.
Taltos