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Two days in the Mountjoy. Will I enjoy the experience?

  • 04-07-2012 10:02PM
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 276 ✭✭


    Two days. 48 hours. 2880 minutes. In the Mountjoy. My first time...



    Will the food be edible?

    Will the bunk bed be ok enough to get at least an hour of sleep?

    Will my rectum get pulverized?

    Will my teeth say 'hello' to the floor?

    Will I meet the guy who f***ed his own mother on the eve of the Mother's Day, a story I heard the radio today?



    So many questions are going through my head right now... I have just 13 days of freedom left.

    Any tips on how to survive there, obviously it's going to be really hard for me as I'm a foreigner?


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Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,735 ✭✭✭Duckworth_Luas


    Any tips on how to survive there, obviously it's going to be really hard for me as I'm a foreigner?
    Just abide dude!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,806 ✭✭✭✭KeithM89_old


    You should watch Oz before you go, itll make you feel better.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 24,608 ✭✭✭✭arybvtcw0eolkf


    You'll be out within the hour.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,640 ✭✭✭Pushtrak




  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,764 ✭✭✭✭Mr.Crinklewood


    Please refer to the Glory hole thread.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,584 ✭✭✭PCPhoto


    what did you do to get 2 days in prison ?

    with the magical system we have :rolleyes: you will be released on good behaviour (automatic remission) within a few hours !!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,654 ✭✭✭TheBody


    What are you being locked up for?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,650 ✭✭✭✭minidazzler


    2 things.

    You have to go up to the biggest toughest guy and immediately knock him out. No questions, just do it, otherwise you are gonna be the bottom bitch.

    The food will be edible.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,863 ✭✭✭✭crosstownk


    Wine bottle corks. You'll soon discover how useful they can be.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,033 ✭✭✭✭Richard Hillman


    Im sure the lads in there have seen plenty of people just in for a couple of days and then leave. Keep your head down and dont talk until spoken to.

    P.S since you're a foreigner you may not know it but you will have to go to the toilet in a bucket. Dont go in hungover and eat lots of fibre ;)


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,752 ✭✭✭cyrusdvirus




  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,366 ✭✭✭✭Kylo Ren


    "Dead man walkin' on the Green Mile"


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,230 ✭✭✭Merkin


    Have you seen Midnight Express?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 24,608 ✭✭✭✭arybvtcw0eolkf


    P.S since you're a foreigner you may not know it but you will have to go to the toilet in a bucket. Dont go in hungover and eat lots of fibre ;)

    You're allowed out of your cell to use the loo.

    And its very unlikely a prisoner sentenced to 48hrs will do more than an hour or so before being let out on T.R.

    No biggie and no need for lube.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 419 ✭✭Gary4279


    Put a nail backwards up the rusty bullet hole ;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,075 ✭✭✭Wattle


    Two whole days? Take the Midnight Express.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,007 ✭✭✭Mance Rayder


    Just play PS3 and smoke weed with everyone else.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,335 ✭✭✭wendell borton


    Take a left turn and go west.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,070 ✭✭✭Birroc


    Immediately go on hunger strike. They'll respect that.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 15,515 ✭✭✭✭admiralofthefleet


    watch midnight express


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,248 ✭✭✭✭B.A._Baracus


    You're allowed out of your cell to use the loo.

    And its very unlikely a prisoner sentenced to 48hrs will do more than an hour or so before being let out on T.R.

    No biggie and no need for lube.


    You serious :eek:
    So being sentenced to 48 hours is just... well .... utter bullsh*t. As you'll only do an hour or two.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,007 ✭✭✭Mance Rayder


    Yeah out in an hour, I wouldn't even sit down.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,404 ✭✭✭Lone Stone


    Ye'l be grand get a little tv in your small one bed roomed cell and an xbox to pass away the hours till lunch time when you get free food, then you can play some pool in the rec room, or go outside and play catch the parcel.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,007 ✭✭✭Mance Rayder


    He won't even make it to a cell. He will be told to sit on a bench and wait. An hour later they will tell him to gtfo.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,067 ✭✭✭✭fryup


    if you're a pretty boy, be careful who you make friends with....



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,147 ✭✭✭PizzamanIRL


    Haha 2 days suck it up and stop telling the internet about your ****.

    What do you want people to say, "Oh yeah, you'll enjoy prison, of course"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,070 ✭✭✭Birroc


    You serious :eek:
    So being sentenced to 48 hours is just... well .... utter bullsh*t. As you'll only do an hour or two.

    Yes B.A. you will only serve an hour for that crime ye did not commit.

    Come in.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 101 ✭✭RHarrow


    The prisons are overcrowded here so you'll most likely be brought in, sat in a cell for a short period and then released.

    Just be nice to everyone you meet so they don't find a reason to keep you in and learn from the experience.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,672 ✭✭✭Peetrik


    You have to go up to the biggest toughest guy and immediately knock him out. No questions, just do it, otherwise you are gonna be the bottom bitch.

    Unless you're big and tough looking... then everyone is going to try knock you out.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,784 ✭✭✭Dirk Gently


    shower gel > soap


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