come to an end

LegacyUser

hi i just recently broke up with my partner of a few years and am finding it tough to cope at the moment.... i have so many mixed up emotions at the moment that i'm finding it hard to function at times... basically its like i've lost my best friend and i'm greiving or something... i guess its gotton to the stage where she wanted to settle down (marriage) but there was something holding me back....
i've been trying to figure out what exactly that was and it has me in knots.... sometimes i craved the single life (grass is greener n all that), sometimes i felt like i'm no longer attracted to her... sometimes i find it such an effort to actually be in the relationship and all of this has affected my mood seriously badly....
i guess i'm trying to over analyse why it hadnt been working but its seriously getting to me.....
can you love someone even if the initial attraction you felt to them isnt present a lot anymore?.... i guess sometimes i felt she didnt make an effort to look her best and it got me down....as if she had settled.... i dunno random thoughts.... sorry for babbling.... i guess it's hurting me badly that i may no longer fancy this person i love....
is there any hope?

inthesameboat

unreg10001 wrote: »

hi i just recently broke up with my partner of a few years and am finding it tough to cope at the moment.... i have so many mixed up emotions at the moment that i'm finding it hard to function at times... basically its like i've lost my best friend and i'm greiving or something... i guess its gotton to the stage where she wanted to settle down (marriage) but there was something holding me back....
i've been trying to figure out what exactly that was and it has me in knots.... sometimes i craved the single life (grass is greener n all that), sometimes i felt like i'm no longer attracted to her... sometimes i find it such an effort to actually be in the relationship and all of this has affected my mood seriously badly....
i guess i'm trying to over analyse why it hadnt been working but its seriously getting to me.....
can you love someone even if the initial attraction you felt to them isnt present a lot anymore?.... i guess sometimes i felt she didnt make an effort to look her best and it got me down....as if she had settled.... i dunno random thoughts.... sorry for babbling.... i guess it's hurting me badly that i may no longer fancy this person i love....
is there any hope?

Im 4 months down the line in a similar situation except im the female and he left me claiming the same thoughts and feelings you have spoken about.
Mind you I always make an effort to look my best but that was for me, not him!
It still hurts like hell and i find most days i cope ok but weekends are hard - some advantages to working so!
I know he was struggling with the whole thing also cause he told me so, not sure how he is now, not much communication these days.
Everyone says it will get better so im just hoping they are right.
I certainly dont want to be with someone who is not certain about me!!

LegacyUser

thanks for replying...... sorry to hear you are going through a tough time....
i guess i need some time apart to think things over..... my mood has been very low and affected things between us. I do love her and miss her terribly but the doubts i have over the spark being gone are driving me mad