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inappropriate crush on my doctor

  • 02-06-2012 5:18pm
    #1
    e777
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1 ✭


    What do you do if you fancy your doctor?

    My doctor is someone I've known for years as he went to the same secondary school as I did, and we hung out with some of the same people.

    I started going to this doc a couple of years ago when the doc I used to attend went on maternity leave. Things were cool, I fancied him a bit whenever I saw him, but as I wasn't there that much it wasn't an issue.

    In the last 18months I've developed a long term illness which has meant that I have to go to the doctor pretty often. And my doc is just so bloody nice that I come away from each appointment like a frustrated teenager.

    I've tried to focus on the things about him that might annoy me, and I've also tried to convince myself that he's gay (even though he used to date a friend of my sis) and hence totally unavailable.

    Part of me thinks I should just start attending another doc in the practice, but he's a great doc and has seen me at my worst through this illness. If anyone has any advice for me, I'd appreciate the help.


Comments

  • #2
    The Big Red Button
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,390 ✭✭✭The Big Red Button


    You really need to look out for your own best interests here.

    Personally, if I fancied my own doctor there is no way I could be totally honest with him about any embarrassing symptoms which may occur. I mean, if you fancy someone, how could you possibly tell them you've been having dodgy bowel movements, etc? :o

    If I were you, I'd go back to your old doctor - I assume she's back from maternity leave by now?! Or find a new doctor.

    I just don't think that you're doing yourself any favours by staying with him.

    And, if he has any professional standards, he wouldn't have any romantic involvement with you while you're a patient, anyways!

    I'd say, for now, find a new doctor, as soon as possible. A few months down the line, if you're still thinking of him, no harm in asking him for a drink, once you're not his patient anymore. :)


  • #3
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 3,505 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    You have to make a choice OP.

    If you want to flirt with him, you've got to create a situation whereby he is only a man who happens to be a doctor. You can't do this if he is your doctor.

    If you want him to be your doctor, then you can't flirt with him or entertain ideas of being with him.

    Of course, if you do get a new doctor (and a good doctor can be hard to find) it might turn out that your crush dissolves (i.e. your attraction may be amplified because he is your doctor, and if he isn't your doctor anymore your feelings may change), or it might turn out that even though he's not your doctor anymore, having had access to your medical files and having set up a patient-doctor dynamic he might not feel comfortable seeing you in a non-professional way.

    To be honest, I'd advise you just forget about it. If it's meant to be, things will come to a head and get sorted out eventually.


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