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How do I start it.....

  • 07-05-2012 7:29pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Okay to cut a long story short....
    My sister was killed in a car accident 2 years ago, we were extremely close as we were only 2 years apart. Anyway, suffice to say it's been pretty tough to get over. I'm a shy guy at the best of times but have become even more introverted since. I was in a relationship but it didn't work out as I just couldn't communicate with her about what I was going through.
    I bumped into a friend of my sisters one night and we ended up chatting for hours and just really clicking. I suppose I'd had a few too many pints so I was more open than I would be normally. Anyway, she started to call me to go for walks and all the rest and we've grown pretty close over the last year,
    Anyway, was out for a pint with the lads in town last week and I saw her with a guy, they were out on a first date and I realized that I was insanely jealous. To the point that I couldn't even really talk to her. It just hit me like a ton of bricks and now I can't stop thinking about her.
    Part of me thinks I need to just tell her how I feel, but I'm terrified of being rejected and hurt. I really don't know how she thinks of me as we became friends under such unusual circumstances, and I guess cos she felt sorry for me.
    If I blurt it out, and she doesn't feel anything for me, it could just be so awkward and I could lose the friendship I cherish most in the world.
    So yeah, guess i just wanted to get all this out and see what people think.


Comments

  • #2
    Piliger
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,741 ✭✭✭Piliger


    Confused much wrote: »
    Part of me thinks I need to just tell her how I feel, but I'm terrified of being rejected and hurt.

    OP ... this is the story of every guys life.

    That's not to diminish the anxiety ... but there is no easy solution. You either speak up or forever be damned to regret. It's that simple.

    Also I suggest you need to get in there quickly before she goes on a second and third and maybe more dates and will be out of reach.

    There is no easy way either. You have to take her aside (in person and not on the phone or by text) and tell her exactly how you feel, and why you didn't realise it before and do now and go for it. Of course she may well reject you. But although that will be painful.... yes it will be painful ... you WILL survive. You WILL SURVIVE. And hopefully you won't have to because she will say yes :P

    Best of luck.


  • #3
    I am a friend
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,479 ✭✭✭I am a friend


    Op the one thing I learned by the loss of my sibling is to grab life by the balls... Go for it.


  • #4
    Beruthiel
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 42,362 Mod ✭✭✭✭Beruthiel


    Confused much wrote: »
    Part of me thinks I need to just tell her how I feel, but I'm terrified of being rejected and hurt.

    The terrible death of your sister must have taught you that life is short and must be lived to the fullest while you are alive.

    You are afraid of being hurt or rejected.
    Is that going to make you feel any worse than sitting there watching her get with someone else while you live every day regretting not having the balls to ask.
    Quit wasting time OP.


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