Speeding doesn't pay

ART6

The Garda pulled him in to the side of the road, and when he opened his window and presented his licence the Guard said "Sir, this is a fifty kilometers per hour zone, and you were clocked at eighty."
"Not possible." The guy protested. "I had it on cruise control at fifty. Your radar gun must be wrong."
Beside him his wife looked up from her knitting. "Come now dear, you know we don't have cruise control."
"Shut up woman." he hissed.
"I also note that you're not wearing your seat belt. That is an automatic fine."
"Oh come on! I took it off to get my licence out!"
"But you never wear your seat belt." His wife said calmly.
"Oh for feck's sake shut up!" The guy snapped.
"And your vehicle tax is three years out of date." Said the Guard.
"Did I forget to put the disc in the holder? Must have done." The guy groaned.
"You haven't taxed or insured it for ages." His wife said.
"Jasus woman, will you ever shut the f**k up?" The driver cried.
The Guard looked across at the wife. "Does he always talk to you like this ma-am?"

"Only when he's pissed!"