Organising a Wedding abroad

Misticles

Im trying to organise a wedding abroad and kind of have a wedding planner on that side to assist.

The menus I think are quite expensive. Upwards of 60 per head. Is this the norm? Menu has 2 starters, 2 mains and a desert. I havnt gotten an exact price for mine yet but that's average price.

I asked the planner about seeing if the hotel would throw in a free night for parents of the bride and groom ie the wedding night. Got a no.

Asked could soft drinks be served after 11pm ( these are the soft drinks that we can bring and serve). Got a no.

I just dont seem to be getting any wiggle room.

I haven't paid any deposit for the planners services yet, I just thought it may be easier to have one on board.

Would I be better negotiating directly with the hotel I plan to use for ceremony and reception?

I like the idea of the planner as they sort out the nitty gritty with Certs etc as its a civil ceremony.

Anyone here organised a civil ceremony from scratch abroad?? I'd save 2200 if I could do it myself but I have no idea where to start.

Thanks in advance!

syklops

Where are you having it?

Your paying the wedding planner to organise the wedding you want. If he/she doesnt want to engage, then get another one. If the hotel is the problem ring them up and tell them you will be having the wedding else where and this is why.

Misticles

syklops wrote: »

Where are you having it?

Your paying the wedding planner to organise the wedding you want. If he/she doesnt want to engage, then get another one. If the hotel is the problem ring them up and tell them you will be having the wedding else where and this is why.

She has been really nice. Was just today I got the unfortunately blah blah no email to my queries. I know here you can haggle in the rooms for the parentals and for the soft drink issue- my mams a recovering alcoholic so want to make havin soft drinks simple and avoid her going to a bar for one.

I have emailed the hotel in relation.

I'm organising it in Croatia. There are only 2/3 planners there ha

Sappa

Sounds like they are charging you an excessive amount for the food and not comping you a room or two is just stingy or profit maximising on their part.
Shop around it does not sound like a good deal inmo.

Misticles

Sappa wrote: »

Sounds like they are charging you an excessive amount for the food and not comping you a room or two is just stingy or profit maximising on their part.
Shop around it does not sound like a good deal inmo.

That's what I was thinking. I have to have choices on the menu cos some of the food is not your big standard beef and chicken given the location.

The cheapest menu is 62pp and goes up to 76pp.

Soup, salad
Fish, veal
Fresh fruit/ tiramisu

That's what's on my menu!

I don't know how to haggle as its all through a planner

hoodwinked

to be fair that hotel sounds really unreasonable, if thy are like that now, what happens if you have a deposit paid and you need something changed?


are there many other options regarding hotels?

Sappa

Misticles wrote: »

That's what I was thinking. I have to have choices on the menu cos some of the food is not your big standard beef and chicken given the location.

The cheapest menu is 62pp and goes up to 76pp.

Soup, salad
Fish, veal
Fresh fruit/ tiramisu

That's what's on my menu!

I don't know how to haggle as its all through a planner

Would it not be cheaper to cut out the planner or are they tied to the hotel,what I mean is could you fly over for a few weekends and organise it yourself.
You would probably save yourself more money and it is not easy haggling over the phone or by email,but when you are there in person you are in a lot better bargaining position to limit the costs.
You could go to a top class hotel in Ireland and get a cheaper deal than the food prices you have quoted also most hotels in Ireland would comp you a room or two at the very least.
The whole concept of having your hotel overseas is to make it different and keep costs down but they seem to be slinging you a raw deal on the costs and maybe it is time to call their bluff.

Misticles

It would cost more than the wedding planner is to fly out the two of 3 times and stay for 2 nights say. Hotels are very expensive!!!

I really want this hotel for both the ceremony and reception. If I can strike better deals by doing it myself I shall

Dam I should have google translated my mail to Croatian.. Make them think I'm a native ha

Gatica

I think for a foreign destination that's a fortune per head! I thought Croatia would be similar to the rest of Europe in price and cheaper than here. 62-78 per head does not sound reasonable for the location unless it's a >5 star hotel. Is it really really swanky?
I would look up other hotel alternatives there, or ask the co-ordinator to do that, that's what you're paying them for.
I wouldn't count on Google translate to do a good job of making you sound like a native (unless you were joking of course)

Sleepy

Ask your wedding co-ordinator to provide alternatives to the hotel as they seem to be a complete rip-off.

Where in Croatia are you having the wedding? I'm guessing Dubrovnik? Maybe look further up the coast? Split or the island of Hvar would be absolutely beautiful for a wedding and hotels etc. are all far cheaper there than in the rather over-developed tourist environment of Dubrovnik imho.

syklops

Misticles wrote: »

She has been really nice. Was just today I got the unfortunately blah blah no email to my queries. I know here you can haggle in the rooms for the parentals and for the soft drink issue- my mams a recovering alcoholic so want to make havin soft drinks simple and avoid her going to a bar for one.

I have emailed the hotel in relation.

I'm organising it in Croatia. There are only 2/3 planners there ha

The germans have ruined Croatia imo. Was there last June, and found it very expensive. The germans drive down in their cars and bring everything with them. All they buy locally is bread and milk.

If there is only 3 planners in the country, they probably have a bit of a cartel going, and are not just getting their fees but kickbacks from all the things you are including food etc.

If I were you, I would ask among your friends and see if any of them have either a Serb or Croat friend. A stay at home mum would be ideal, and ask them if they would act as wedding planner for you here in Ireland, e.g. sending emails, making phone calls, etc. If its a native who is not on the take, you might get a better deal. Also if its made clear to the hotel in their own language that you will take the wedding elsewhere if the prices don't come down, you might find them more agreeable.

As another poster said, check out Split as well. All of Croatia is beautiful, and you should be able to find a small off the beaten track hotel which would be certainly cheaper than the trouirst trap areas.

Sappa

I have a Croatian friend living here,I showed him your prices and he thought even for a 5 star in Dubrovnik your getting a rough deal.
As a previous poster mentioned he also said along the Croatian coast you have stunning locations abd great hotels that would snap your hand off for the business.

Misticles

Sappa wrote: »

I have a Croatian friend living here,I showed him your prices and he thought even for a 5 star in Dubrovnik your getting a rough deal.
As a previous poster mentioned he also said along the Croatian coast you have stunning locations abd great hotels that would snap your hand off for the business.

Would your friend be able to recommend any of these that are along the coast?

I sent my list to the hotel wedding co ordinator and she said that the only way to get all of this was by a wedding planner sure she already told me no. I said this to the wedding co ordinator and I got a best of luck in the future kind of email. Left a bad taste in my mouth!

totallegend

Hi Misticles,

I got married in Spain last year, and certainly we were paying a lot less for really good quality food, I know that's no use to you but maybe if you don't have your heart set on this particular venue, it's time to shop around a bit more? Our planner took us to loads of venues, haggled on our behalf and gave us really good advice.

What we did was actually get legally married here in a registry office with just a couple of witnesses, then had a ceremony out there, saved all that hassle with local officials, documentation etc, so that might be an idea for you.

To me, it sounds like the problem is your wedding planner.

syklops

totallegend wrote: »

What we did was actually get legally married here in a registry office with just a couple of witnesses, then had a ceremony out there, saved all that hassle with local officials, documentation etc, so that might be an idea for you.

Might do the same myself when it comes to it. The paper work is ridiculous.

Misticles

There are only 2 planners in Dubrovnik so might hit the other one up. They are supposed to get me what I want aren't they??!!
I'm not asking for a lot like!

Also the hotels don't seem to set up your venue, the planner and her people do.

Misticles

Did your family and guest know you were already married?

Sleepy

Misticles wrote: »

There are only 2 planners in Dubrovnik so might hit the other one up. They are supposed to get me what I want aren't they??!!
I'm not asking for a lot like!

Also the hotels don't seem to set up your venue, the planner and her people do.

Did you look for planners outside of Dubrovnik?

I've heard repeatedly over the past year how insanely expensive Dubrovnik has become which surprised me because I found Split / Hvar and Zadar all really good value for money. Sounds like it's a London / rest of UK thing.

Misticles

Sleepy wrote: »

Misticles wrote: »

There are only 2 planners in Dubrovnik so might hit the other one up. They are supposed to get me what I want aren't they??!!
I'm not asking for a lot like!

Also the hotels don't seem to set up your venue, the planner and her people do.

Did you look for planners outside of Dubrovnik?

I've heard repeatedly over the past year how insanely expensive Dubrovnik has become which surprised me because I found Split / Hvar and Zadar all really good value for money. Sounds like it's a London / rest of UK thing.

Nope, both I found were based there. It is something that I will definitely look into! The venue is lovely. It overlooks the sea but I'm sure all coastal places could provide this.

Sleepy

To give you an idea of what the rest of Croatia can look like, here's me in Hvar last year:


(the model would incur an extra fee )

Though, in all honesty, I think Split would be the better location: it's an ancient Roman walled city which is incredibly well preserved and full of incredible places to take photos, especially down by the harbour (where you get the ferry out to Hvar which could be a good trip for a night or two of your stay?)

Misticles

Sleepy wrote: »

To give you an idea of what the rest of Croatia can look like, here's me in Hvar last year:


(the model would incur an extra fee )

Though, in all honesty, I think Split would be the better location: it's an ancient Roman walled city which is incredibly well preserved and full of incredible places to take photos, especially down by the harbour (where you get the ferry out to Hvar which could be a good trip for a night or two of your stay?)

oohh thats pretty!

I'm definitlet going to look into the places that you mentioned.

|PS whats the extra charge ha

Sleepy

At least 2 pints! lol

Buzz84

We wanted to get married abroad but couldnt believe how dear it was everywhere. We would of had about 100 people and it just didnt make sense.

Misticles

Buzz84 wrote: »

We wanted to get married abroad but couldnt believe how dear it was everywhere. We would of had about 100 people and it just didnt make sense.

I dont think it would work out cheaper if you're having a large wedding. Our's is only 40-50 people MAX! and at that 30 might only go!

totallegend

Misticles wrote: »

Did your family and guest know you were already married?

We didn't broadcast it but told our immediate family. As far as we were concerned, the ceremony abroad was the wedding and the registry office bit in Ireland was just paperwork.

Sappa

totallegend wrote: »

Misticles wrote: »

Did your family and guest know you were already married?

We didn't broadcast it but told our immediate family. As far as we were concerned, the ceremony abroad was the wedding and the registry office bit in Ireland was just paperwork.

That's what we and many others did,unless your going for a church wedding if does not matter.

Misticles

Sappa wrote: »

That's what we and many others did,unless your going for a church wedding if does not matter.

Might look into this...

So you just booked into a registry office was it? and had a ceremony abroad. Did anything need to be signed there or was that what you avoided?

Heard from a nice planner last night! Sent my list of requests, and all can be met and she wrote if it would be an extra cost..

She said that some hotels wont give the bride and groom a complimentary room on the night if the wedding wasnt held there....!

Sleepy

Glad to hear you got a better planner. Best of luck with the planning, Croatia's a beautiful country!

Misticles

Sleepy wrote: »

Glad to hear you got a better planner. Best of luck with the planning, Croatia's a beautiful country!

I've been looking at Hvar!! Lovely lovely place!

Sappa

Misticles wrote: »

Sappa wrote: »

That's what we and many others did,unless your going for a church wedding if does not matter.

Might look into this...

So you just booked into a registry office was it? and had a ceremony abroad. Did anything need to be signed there or was that what you avoided?

Heard from a nice planner last night! Sent my list of requests, and all can be met and she wrote if it would be an extra cost..

She said that some hotels wont give the bride and groom a complimentary room on the night if the wedding wasnt held there....!

Your going to have to give 3 months notice to the registrar in Ireland,copy of your passports and original birth Cerys taken and you meet them for a quick chat.
They give you a date,ours was in a small hotel near the city and it was so relaxed.
We only had 5 people for this part and by luck we knew the registrar.
He said no need for formalities which really relaxed everyone,we sat down had a chat about with him,he was such a decent guy,signed the paper we all shook hands and off we went this took maybe 20 mins.
Our ceremony then took place overseas,we didn't have many guests because of the distance but that did not matter in fact it helped limiting the stress.
Literally flew in had nothing planned,loved the hotel we were in booked their villa for 3 weeks had the wedding on the 2nd wk,had a little sala on the beach,we both arrived on elephants with 2guys on acoustic playing one by u2,place was covered in flowers.
Let 6 birds free from their cages,planted a tree had a small ceremony then back to the villa where they transformed our pool deck into an open bar with 3 cooks cooking seafood or whatever you wanted and the 2 guys playing guitar for the night.
I remember just sipping a few beers before the ceremony in the pool with a few guests and we all were super relaxed,worked out way under budget but also suited our style no stress

The Lovely Muffin

A family member of mine got married in Dubrovnik two years ago.

I'll ask her for info and the wedding planner they used and will PM you if I get any info.

If you want to know anything else just PM me and let me know (I don't check the Wedding forum often).

Misticles

so Hvar is out.. it's working out a lot more expensive than Dubrovnik!

Sleepy

Did you look at Split? It's the place where you get the ferry if you're going to Hvar, stunning spot and you could ferry over to Hvar for a couple of days before / after the wedding,

Misticles

Sleepy wrote: »

Did you look at Split? It's the place where you get the ferry if you're going to Hvar, stunning spot and you could ferry over to Hvar for a couple of days before / after the wedding,

I'm going through various planners... Hvar is coming in at min 15k!!

I want a beach front ceremony and the reception on a terrace overlooking the sea.

Tbh I have fallen in love with Hvar and my inital location in Dubrovnik... now... where can I rob a bank :pac:

I have emailed a planner about weddings in spit

totallegend

Misticles wrote: »

I'm going through various planners... Hvar is coming in at min 15k!!

I want a beach front ceremony and the reception on a terrace overlooking the sea.

Tbh I have fallen in love with Hvar and my inital location in Dubrovnik... now... where can I rob a bank :pac:

I have emailed a planner about weddings in spit

I would have assumed Croatia would be a cheaper option than say Spain or Italy, apparently not... Did you try weddingsonline.ie? You might get more suggestions there, my missus lived on that website when we were planning our wedding in Spain.

Misticles

totallegend wrote: »

I would have assumed Croatia would be a cheaper option than say Spain or Italy, apparently not... Did you try weddingsonline.ie? You might get more suggestions there, my missus lived on that website when we were planning our wedding in Spain.

I'll have a look at it

Misticles

I went back to the initial planner asking had they come back with a menu price.
77 pp
Sparkling wine upon arrival + nibbles, 5pp + nibbles (tba)
got everything else in my list oh wait no I didnt the bedrooms for parents are at special rates thus same as the guest rates. GAH!

Misticles

OK it would seem that venues don't want to take bookings for 2014 as they don't have prices etc! A planner told me that the prices may not be made until 2013 or at the latest Spring 2014! This to me is too late as the people I want to invite may need the time to save so I would rather have a date set. The planner has said she will do her best to try and insist that they take the booking for the date I want.

In Ireland you can book 2 years ahead, why not abroad

Is this the norm for weddings abroad?

Sleepy

In times of such uncertainty for the euro etc. I can sort of understand someone being reluctant to give a price for an event 2 years away (and imagine the price you'll get may end up being on the high side). Surely the only notice people need at this stage is a basic "it'll be in Croatia in [month] of 2014"? It's not like they could book flights at this stage anyway...

Misticles

Sleepy wrote: »

In times of such uncertainty for the euro etc. I can sort of understand someone being reluctant to give a price for an event 2 years away (and imagine the price you'll get may end up being on the high side). Surely the only notice people need at this stage is a basic "it'll be in Croatia in [month] of 2014"? It's not like they could book flights at this stage anyway...

I would be willing to pay if the prices are different when they are decided. I just want to get the date set.

Misticles

And another one advising to wait until 2013 to book anywhere!

I am actually considering changing the location at this stage!

Misticles

Also, how does one politely tell people that are getting invites what colours they cannot wear due to them being the bridal party colours?!

Sleepy

Misticles wrote: »

Also, how does one politely tell people that are getting invites what colours they cannot wear due to them being the bridal party colours?!

You can't.

You can tell your friends the colour of the bridesmaids dresses and most will avoid it but putting it on an invite or trying to "forbid" a colour would make you look like a total bridezilla tbh.

EricPraline

Misticles wrote: »

Also, how does one politely tell people that are getting invites what colours they cannot wear due to them being the bridal party colours?!

Some people tend to incorporate the colour into the invitation in a subtle way - others encourage bridesmaids to informally spread the word. But really there is no way you can explicitly instruct your guests on their choice of attire without coming across as very rude and controlling.

Gatica

I'm afraid I agree with Sleepy... you can't really tell your friends/family what to wear/not to wear.
However, people may avoid your colour scheme if it's in your invites colour-scheme; but they won't be able to do much about it if they've already bought their outfit.

Misticles

hhmm tbh I don't really care if I come across as a bridezilla.

I don't want people in the same colours as my bridesmaid/MOH as I am only have the one person.
I know for a fact that people will wear these colours. It would only matter if it was a dress of the same colours.

I'm sure I'll think of a way of spreading the word.

Sleepy

Step back, breath and think what does it really matter if a cousin's girlfriend happens to be wearing the same colour as your matron of honour?

Answer: it doesn't. Not a bit.

Misticles

Sleepy wrote: »

Step back, breath and think what does it really matter if a cousin's girlfriend happens to be wearing the same colour as your matron of honour?

Answer: it doesn't. Not a bit.

No cousins coming ha but I see where you are coming from.

Misticles

Things coming together nicely