I hate my job - feel lost

LegacyUser

I'm 29 years old and have been in my job for 6 years. I sort of fell into the job after college as I had no idea what I wanted to do. Going in to college I had planned to go on to do teaching in secondary school but I changed my mind before finishing my degree. I graduated with a good degree, however, it is an arts degree in subjects that are really only suited to teaching.

I am working in the public sector in the midlands (close to where I live which isn't too bad) and I hate it. Its a public facing role. I am currently completing a masters part-time which is related to the area I am working in but I am rapidly losing interest meaning I'm struggling to complete it. I will finish it but, in the end, I really don't feel that this qualification is going to benefit me as there are so many others in my department that have the same masters, many with decades of experience. When promotions do start happening again (to fill the positions left empty by all the early retirements) there will be so much competition and I can't see myself getting anywhere. The recruitment embargo means we're incredibly short-staffed, morale among the staff is at an all-time low and management don't care. Priorities are all wrong and anyone who dares to open their mouth is shot down. I've basically had enough and I want out.

The problem is that I have no idea what I want to do! I want to get into an area that is marginally related to what I currently do, but in the private sector. There is another masters I could do for this area and a few places offer it part time meaning I could continue to work. I couldn't afford to go back to college full-time. It will mean getting a loan though. I currently have no debts to my name so hopefully that will stand to me getting a personal loan.

I'm just worried about the future. I am miserable in my job but I'm also in a very long-term relationship and we are hoping to start a family in a few years time. Everything seems so uncertain and I should probably just get on with things as they are ("lucky to have a job" and all that) but at the same time I am so frustrated and dejected coming home from work every day. I work really hard for very little pay and there is no possibility of advancing. I hate the "public service" attitude that I see among so many of my co-workers and I really need to get out.

Sorry, this is all a muddle. If anyone has any pearls of wisdom they can offer on this it would be much appreciated.

genie_us

Hi OP

I just wanted to reply and say that I know exactly how you are feeling. In fact I wrote a very similar post myself a few months ago here as well.

I am in a similar position, I'm 31 and almost 2 years married. I absolutely hate my job and I also hate the long commute each way to get to and from it. I spend my week wishing for Friday and it's no way to be.

Anyway, to get to the point. It all began to get on top of me last year, I was suffering from stress which was work related and caused some other health side affects. This was when I knew something would have to give. I had to make a decision - stay and be grateful for the job I have and try and get through it (and be miserable) or think about what it was I wanted to do with my life and then work out how to get there.
It's a lot easier said than done.
For one, I don't have the money to go back to college, or give up my job. So thought about what I love doing, found an online course that I can do in my own time and now I'm nearly a year on and so much happier.
Although I'm still in the same job that I hate, and I still hate it every bit as much, this project has given me something new to focus on. I might not ever be able to make it my full time career but it's certainly something to aim for and it's a light at the end of the miserable work tunnel.

I think you should try and work out what you do want to do with your time and then figure out a way to get there. A lot of people say to me, sure aren't you lucky you have a job, but it doesn't make me feel any happier.

It's not an easy position to be in, sometimes I think it's the not knowing things that is worse. So try and figure that out first and then go from there.

I hope things work out for you!

Lorrs33

I'm in a similar position. I work in retail, flexible, and although that used to sound like a breeze to me, I absolutely hate it. Once I finished college I was so scared about what to do next I did a pointless FAS course that wasted a year of my life, I applied to a masters that I realised I didn't want to do and wasted €300 (deposit) before rejecting it.

I agree with the last post, try to find something to aim for, something else to focus on. I do voluntary work as I'm trying to gain experience for a masters I do definitely want to do. It's really changed me, I feel like I have a purpose helping people who need to talk. Would you consider volunteering? You may even find something that could gain you the experience to do what you want to do in the future.

Cunning Stunt

wow - there must be a lot of people with this issue - me included. I got a fantastic leaving cert and ended up on an IT course with little or no interest for it, but i finished it. That IT diploma is from a decade ago, so its now very outdated, given that the industry moves so fast. I now work a boring office job (nothing to do with IT)and sometimes I can't believe how much I have wasted my potential.

I like the advice about studying in my own time - a friend had also
recommended that. I will look into it, and I think the OP should too.
Maybe it's our ticket out of the work 'rut' we are in.

Johnny_BravoIII

You know want you want to do............just do it.

Do you need a masters to find work in the private sector?

Have you tried to find your ideal job first?
I don't just mean surfing the net.
Get out the phone book & make a target list of private companies you fancy. Ring the reception, find out the managers name & email, phone him, tell him your situation, that you want advice on changing careers & would really appreciate 5minutes of his time............chase him down if you have to.....whatever it takes.

Go & speak with them personally for "general advice".
Make contacts, ask for work part-time, job-brige employment, offer your services for free at weekends or take 3 weeks holidays & work for him on a project...........who know's your future employer could pay your masters , you could end up working without it or you could pursue it over weekends for the next 5 years.

If you really need the masters .......save every penney between now & September, work weekends in a bar, sell your toy collection........whatever it takes to get the cash together & go for it.

You are analysing this decision to death.
You cannot see the wood for the trees at this stage.
Anything worth doing is going to hurt a little. Get on with it.

ps
LT relationship, she'll support you & admire your bravery in the end.
Have kids & so what....... be broke for a few years, the kids won't notice.

Finally, quit listening to people holding you back........you don't have to be grateful for a job you don't want.......it's nonsense logic & a typically miserable Irish point-of-view.

You get 1 shot at life buddy.

LuckyLloyd

Get your CV together, set up a LinkedIn profile and start applying for jobs in the area you believe you would need another masters for. You may find the extra masters is not essential, and by actually preparing applications and having to compile your career to date you may gain some focus or inspiration on what the next steps you need to take are.

LegacyUser

Johnny_BravoIII wrote: »

You know want you want to do............just do it.
Do you need a masters to find work in the private sector?

I would need a masters for the area I want to go into, yes.

Johnny_BravoIII wrote: »

Have you tried to find your ideal job first?

Without the masters I wouldn’t have a look in.

Johnny_BravoIII wrote: »

You are analysing this decision to death.
You cannot see the wood for the trees at this stage.
Anything worth doing is going to hurt a little. Get on with it.

While I appreciate the advice I don’t appreciate you oversimplifying the issue. It’s not as simple as just ringing random companies and seeing if they’ll take me. The area I want to ideally end up in is specialised and the qualification is an absolute necessity. I am already trying to finish a masters while working full-time so I can’t simply start another one and “get on with it”.

Johnny_BravoIII wrote: »

LT relationship, she'll support you & admire your bravery in the end. Have kids & so what....... be broke for a few years, the kids won't notice.

Well given that I’m female I would be the one physically having the kids so it’s not as simple as you might think.

genie_us

HateMyJob2012 wrote: »

The area I want to ideally end up in is specialised and the qualification is an absolute necessity. I am already trying to finish a masters while working full-time so I can’t simply start another one and “get on with it”.

Hi again OP

Is it possible to stop doing the masters if you're not enjoying it and it's not going to benefit you for where you want to be? Like if work are paying for it would you have to pay them back or anything?
What are the obstacles in getting to a place where you can do the masters you want to do?

I wondered would it be an idea to talk to someone like a life coach. Sounds a bit Oprah-y I know but a friend of mine went to one and thought it was brilliant. It really helped her focus on what she wants and figure out how to get there. Sometimes these things aren't as hard as they first seem, especially when you're in a miserable place it's hard to see the positives. Once you can see that's it's achievable it might even help when things are bad now at work, knowing that you can get to where you want to be

Johnny_BravoIII

I am already trying to finish a masters while working full-time so I can’t simply start another one and “get on with it”.

As said above.
My point is, it seems to me you are quite clear in where you want to go career-wise.
As questioned above, is the current masters necessary to take you into this specialised area, if not, why did you start it in the 1st place & is it possible to switch?
If it's not possible to switch, I suggest you dump it & re-focus.

In terms of job-hunting, my point is get personal with your connections.
I'm not talking about ringing up "random companies asking them to hire you".
I'm saying identify the companies you wish to work for in your dream job.
Find out the manager within this organisation who you would work for.
Reach out and ask to buy them coffee so you can "pick their brains"

This will give you the motivation & clarity you need to make the jump & will provide you with unrivalled contacts when you do.
To be even clearer:
I saying sit-down and talk with the top 10 people who could give you your dream job in 2 years time.
Stay in touch by through LinkedIn & occasional emails.
Incorporate them in your study project work.
Use these contacts to identify your thesis topic....ie. it being in need of practical real-life reasearch for your future dream job. Do an awesome thesis & copy to your future boss, who helped you pick the topic..........................
...................................................................
.....................................etc etc..........

If you were guaranteed your dream job in 2 years would you take the plunge?


Overall, don't accept the "lucky to have a job attitude". I appreciate realities of the situation but don't be afraid to chase your ambitions.
Focus on the goal, ignore the dangers (to some extent) & go for it.

Ps
I appreciate kid's is a huge interruption but you have possibly a 50 year career left.