Compared to other countries, is the gay scene in Ireland ****?

1ZRed

I've been out in Manchester but not to any gay club/bar, yet I still got hit on and flirted with quite a bit. In Ireland I think everyone's a little reserved, which I like, but it really shows up the differences.
Granted I'm not into the whole gay scene (prefer ordinary clubs/bars) because I'm only 17 but would you guys agree?

L.Jenkins

I spent a good portion of my early 20s in the US. I never hit the scene over there, but they were by far more sociable, in the sense that I almost always wound up in the company of a group of strangers every night I went out.

azezil

Varies from country to country and your own expectations I suppose.
I went to Madrid a few years back and stayed near the gay district, I didn't feel comfortable at all, guys practically shagging in every ally way. Wasn't my cup of tea at all, I much prefer Ireland's scene to that.

checkcheek

i feel the same, i always feel more free spirited when im around europe or basically anywhere except ireland, i dont know why, maybe its cause ive grown up here or something but i always feel other countries are more liberal

1ZRed

checkcheek wrote: »

i feel the same, i always feel more free spirited when im around europe or basically anywhere except ireland, i dont know why, maybe its cause ive grown up here or something but i always feel other countries are more liberal

Yeah I feel the same way. Its like I can get up to more when I'm away from Ireland. I definitely think that its the whole anti-gay attitude that still resonates with people that causes us to be more subdued. That and the fact that there is only 4.6 million in the country and only >10% of them are gay.

peasncarrots

i find the gay scene in ireland(dublin) kinda not as friendly as london or even cork or galway not as friendly non irish people are more likely to chat

Ireland gay scene is simply not big enough or diverse enough. It remains quite small and clicky.
On the other hand in the UK, Holland, Germany and many other cities, the gay scene tends to be more diverse, much friendlier and open to all.
I have never been to a gay club in another country where you practically have to prove how gay you are before you can get past the doormen like in Ireland.
How young people manage to come out or penetrate the gay scene in this country is baffling to me.

ongarboy

1ZRed wrote: »

Yeah I feel the same way. Its like I can get up to more when I'm away from Ireland. I definitely think that its the whole anti-gay attitude that still resonates with people that causes us to be more subdued. That and the fact that there is only 4.6 million in the country and only >10% of them are gay.

The novelty and newness of scenes abroad may make them appear better. I think there can be an element of subjectivity when judging our own scenes in Ireland also. We can only view them as residents who have to rely on them every week and not as city break tourists so our views can be slightly schewed whereas the opposite is true for the city scenes abroad that we visit.

For someone who has actively socialised on the scene for 10 years in Dublin now, I think the scene is actually not that bad here compared to other similar sized cities abroad. My only wish is that we had more smaller, local type bars rather than super pub/club type venues as I think the smaller pubs are more conducive to striking up conversations with strangers. Wilde bar (formerly Stranos) in Galway is a perfect example of a local, intimate type bar where you can easily strike up conversation with staff/punters alike. Jurassic part of the George can be similarly successful on occasion but can too often also be hit and miss.

BrazIrish

ongarboy wrote: »

The novelty and newness of scenes abroad may make them appear better. I think there can be an element of subjectivity when judging our own scenes in Ireland also. We can only view them as residents who have to rely on them every week and not as city break tourists so our views can be slightly schewed whereas the opposite is true for the city scenes abroad that we visit.

For someone who has actively socialised on the scene for 10 years in Dublin now, I think the scene is actually not that bad here compared to other similar sized cities abroad. My only wish is that we had more smaller, local type bars rather than super pub/club type venues as I think the smaller pubs are more conducive to striking up conversations with strangers. Wilde bar (formerly Stranos) in Galway is a perfect example of a local, intimate type bar where you can easily strike up conversation with staff/punters alike. Jurassic part of the George can be similarly successful on occasion but can too often also be hit and miss.

I quite agree with that, from my point of view, as a foreign, I think the scene is compatible to the size of Dublin and I view people (at least in Dublin) as liberal here. I also agree with the point that there should be smaller places. I think Panti bar is a good example, nice to hold a conversation. Even though it's not that easy to get to know people here as they are much more reserved, non-Irish tend to speak more and exchange contacts and then see each other again.

Anyway, in Brazil for instance, the scene in big cities like Sao Paulo o Rio is really huge and you see clearly it's getting more and more liberal with guys/ girls holding hands and kissing in public areas like the tube but still there's a long way ahead. I personally don't like it myself (gay or straight couples) as I am much more reserved. Never been to any other gay place in Europe but been to few countries and the impression I had is that London is an exception but looks great.

floggg

I don't think the apparent lack of openness or approachability is a problem with the gay scene as such in Ireland but with Irish culture generally. If anything, I think the gay scene is more open and approachable than pubs generally.

I think as a people, despite our reputation for warm welcomes and hospitality, we tend to mainly just look to our own and don't really go out of our way to engage strangers.

On "straight" nights out, anybody I know would mainly just stick with the group they were in for most of the not, and might only start mixing with strangers after a few drinks. Even then, it's either to score or else they have some banter but they will be forgotten again the next morning.

Other countries are perhaps more open and sociable and that's reflected in their night life, straight or gay.

JupiterKid

ongarboy wrote: »

The novelty and newness of scenes abroad may make them appear better. I think there can be an element of subjectivity when judging our own scenes in Ireland also. We can only view them as residents who have to rely on them every week and not as city break tourists so our views can be slightly schewed whereas the opposite is true for the city scenes abroad that we visit.

For someone who has actively socialised on the scene for 10 years in Dublin now, I think the scene is actually not that bad here compared to other similar sized cities abroad. My only wish is that we had more smaller, local type bars rather than super pub/club type venues as I think the smaller pubs are more conducive to striking up conversations with strangers. Wilde bar (formerly Stranos) in Galway is a perfect example of a local, intimate type bar where you can easily strike up conversation with staff/punters alike. Jurassic part of the George can be similarly successful on occasion but can too often also be hit and miss.

Yep, I completely agree. Also I think us Irish have a tendency to moan and give out and bitch about our lot - whether it be the gay scene in Dublin, the price of drink in pubs, the roads, the weather, etc.. We really do think that everywhere else is better when often that's really not the case at all.:cool:

That said, I think that London, Amsterdam, Berlin and Barcelona have the best gay scenes in Europe.

Babybuff

Barcelona is crazy and the women are exceptionally beautiful. Was walking down Las Ramblas and a beautiful blonde wearing shades walking in the opposite direction started shouting at me in Spanish, seems I was wearing too much clothing as she gestured for me to take my top off..which I did for the craic. (was wearing bikini top underneath so was ok )) she got a giggle out of it and I got the thumbs up.

wouldnt be doing that on O Connell St now in all fairness.

checkcheek

i think its a case of the grass is always greener on the other side

1ZRed

checkcheek wrote: »

i think its a case of the grass is always greener on the other side

I don't know about that now.
Those hot Aussies make the grass on the other side neon green!:D

Rick_

Went to a gay night over the weekend with some straight mates. They commented a few times on how reserved and 'to themselves' everyone was and the whole event didn't seem very social. Most there just stayed in their own little cliques and made no effort to socialise with anyone else. It was a strange night even for me when no-one really chatted to you, so I can imagine how off-putting it was for my straight friends who felt very odd and out of place there, almost unwelcome.

df1985

Im just back from new york so obviously im going to think the scene here is ****e! over there everyone is chatty, friendly.....and bloody hot. an accent goes a long way

new york= disneyland
dublin=funderland....

Barna77

The answer is in the question...

:pac:

Conor30

Paddy C wrote: »

Went to a gay night over the weekend with some straight mates. They commented a few times on how reserved and 'to themselves' everyone was and the whole event didn't seem very social. Most there just stayed in their own little cliques and made no effort to socialise with anyone else. It was a strange night even for me when no-one really chatted to you, so I can imagine how off-putting it was for my straight friends who felt very odd and out of place there, almost unwelcome.

Your straight mates summed up Dublin's scene very well.

Conor30

JupiterKid wrote: »

That said, I think that London, Amsterdam, Berlin and Barcelona have the best gay scenes in Europe.

London, Amsterdam, Berlin, Barcelona, Madrid, Munich, Copenhagen, Manchester, Birmingham, Liverpool, Paris, Prague, Zurich, Vienna etc. all have scenes much bigger & better than Dublin's and that's just Europe! Dublin's cliquey & closeted scene simply doesn't compare.

1ZRed

Conor30 wrote: »

JupiterKid wrote: »

That said, I think that London, Amsterdam, Berlin and Barcelona have the best gay scenes in Europe.

London, Amsterdam, Berlin, Barcelona, Madrid, Munich, Copenhagen, Manchester, Birmingham, Liverpool, Paris, Prague, Zurich, Vienna etc. all have scenes much bigger & better than Dublin's and that's just Europe! Dublin's cliquey & closeted scene simply doesn't compare.

Don't talk to me about it!:(
I'm starting college in Galway so I'm even more limited.
Going to London next month tho!;)

ongarboy

Paddy C wrote: »

Went to a gay night over the weekend with some straight mates. They commented a few times on how reserved and 'to themselves' everyone was and the whole event didn't seem very social. Most there just stayed in their own little cliques and made no effort to socialise with anyone else. It was a strange night even for me when no-one really chatted to you, so I can imagine how off-putting it was for my straight friends who felt very odd and out of place there, almost unwelcome.

Out of interest though, if you went to a non gay busy large suburban bar in any city or indeed large bars in city centres in Ireland with a group of friends and where you didn't happen to know anyone else that was socialising in those same bars, would those other strangers be coming up to you to stop, chat and make friends with you? Likewise would you be doing the same with them? Does that make you and them standoffish if there isn't such interaction? I shoudn't have thought so. Why is there a different expectation on the scene then?

DubArk

I think the question should relate to cities rather then countries as the difference between London and Hull City would be gigantic as far as the scene.

I ran from Dublins gay scene many a year ago as it was too small, bitchy and incestuous!! It drove me into the ground but then again I was a very different person back then to who I am now. I moved to New York and then to London, I have also been on the scene in Manchester, Liverpool, Birmingham, Brighton, Amsterdam, Berlin, Sydney, Boston and San Francisco, to mention a few…. Sounds like I’m a slut reading that back lol!! I’m not; I just travel a lot and have lived in a number of major cities over the years.

Sydney was one of the biggest disappointments… it was as if they were all waiting for the next load of fresh meat to arrive! A warning to all….. Don’t ever go to a gay bar in Aberdeen!!! It's not quite a scene, as a car crash…. Trust me!

I would have said that London, New York and San Francisco were the places to visit or live, in my experience. It’s mainly to do with diversity of people, a mix of nationalities and the size of the city. I have moved back to Dublin and still don’t bother with the scene here…. It may have changed but I doubt it!

Rick_

ongarboy wrote: »

Out of interest though, if you went to a non gay busy large suburban bar in any city or indeed large bars in city centres in Ireland with a group of friends and where you didn't happen to know anyone else that was socialising in those same bars, would those other strangers be coming up to you to stop, chat and make friends with you? Likewise would you be doing the same with them? Does that make you and them standoffish if there isn't such interaction? I shoudn't have thought so. Why is there a different expectation on the scene then?

I can't count the number of times I have been in small, medium and large bars and have been standing alone or with friends either at the bar, in the smoking area or even just in random spots and people have walked past and said hello or approached one of my friends (never myself! ) to chat or introduce themselves. Yes, on quite a few occasions I have approached strangers and struck up a conversation with them. It's called being sociable, something not exactly unexpected in a social situation like a bar/pub/club!

I have never refused to talk to anyone who has tried to chat to me in a bar or any other place for that matter, out of manners if nothing else. It is very disheartening, for a gay man in a gay bar, to try and be friendly with someone and for them to literally look down their nose at you, throw you a dirty look and walk off as if you were scum. Yes, that happened to me before a few times on other nights out but I can only imagine how weird it was for my straight friends who were with me on Saturday night and had it done to them.

Incidentally, my friends did get talking to a woman in the toilets, who, after finding out they were straight, was so overjoyed that they came with me as they want more straight people to come to the gay nights to boost the numbers and show it's a friendly event open to everyone, but considering the conduct of plenty of the people there I pretty much doubt the nights will attract anyone else other than the bitchy cliques that already make up it's clientèle. I know I certainly won't be going back.

ongarboy

I'm sorry to hear that has been your experience. It is a shame that so many here have experienced this unfriendliness on the Irish scenes but do not have that problem in straight settings. I guess a guy coming up to a guy in a gay bar can potentially mean different things than in a straight bar (even if the intention is identical and completely platonic ie to strike up a chat/have a laugh/shoot the breeze/even make friends etc - likewise for girls). Maybe this potential conflict of interest that such friendly gestures may not be perceived as platonic explains (but shouldn't justify)the rudeness or unfriendliness... It's a hard one to figure out alright.

Nathan Berburoc

ongarboy wrote: »

I'm sorry to hear that has been your experience. It is a shame that so many here have experienced this unfriendliness on the Irish scenes but do not have that problem in straight settings. I guess a guy coming up to a guy in a gay bar can potentially mean different things than in a straight bar (even if the intention is identical and completely platonic ie to strike up a chat/have a laugh/shoot the breeze/even make friends etc - likewise for girls). Maybe this potential conflict of interest that such friendly gestures may not be perceived as platonic explains (but shouldn't justify)the rudeness or unfriendliness... It's a hard one to figure out alright.

yeah Id completely agree with that ....id frequent a lot of the dublin gay bars with my mates,and its a sure thing the second you even make small talk or just bar conversation with a bloke in them they seem to assume one of two things a) wants to shag me b) wants to shag one of my mates....then again sometimes theyre right of course

SolarFlash

The gay bars are the same everywhere I've been out. The worst place was Seoul in South Korea man some real mean queens there. I came close to getting assaulted by one guy for saying hello to him and did get assaulted by another guy for not saying hello to him lol. These guys were all yanks, the Korean guys were adorable.

Itaewon

It is very interesting to read the various opinions about Dublin's gay scene. I am a gay person from Dublin but only came-out and started to visit gay bars when I left the country. Now that I am "out" I am excited to see what these places have to offer when I return to Dublin in a few months times.

SolarFlash wrote: »

The gay bars are the same everywhere I've been out. The worst place was Seoul in South Korea man some real mean queens there. I came close to getting assaulted by one guy for saying hello to him and did get assaulted by another guy for not saying hello to him lol. These guys were all yanks, the Korean guys were adorable.

I live in Korea at the moment. The broader culture in Korea is very much anti-gay. But there are a lot of gay people, albeit closeted, and the Korean gays are very beautiful. I cannot compare Seoul to anywhere else but I have to disagree with SolarFish. The scene in Seoul is very sociable - sometimes even too friendly what with the occasional unwanted grope! There is a great ethnic mix and everybody gets along. They have to because the bars/clubs are so small that everybody is dangerously crammed in, bumper to bumper. Yes, there are a lot of eccentric types but assault? That's not too common.

After reading a lot of the above posts, I will not be exploding onto the Dublin scene with wide eyed enthusiasm and great expectation. I will more likely tepidly tip-toe onto it and expect a less sympathetic and wide-armed welcome than what I've experienced in Seoul, where strangers can become good friends on "Homo Hill."

SolarFlash

Ok Seoul is not that bad I did love the edgy cosmopolitan atmosphere and did meet a lot of cool people It was just two dicks who started the trouble but you know it is kind of dodgy there.

For one thing there are no bouncers in any bars or nightclubs and people are drinking until 5am very often. Itewaon in general is crazy wild. The Gay scene in Dublin is bigger and it's not as welcoming to strangers as Seoul so be prepared for that on the plus side there are way more hot guys in Dublin.

out of town

I am originally from India and living and working in Tennessee, USA. I am here in Limerick on conference travels till the coming Sunday. Tennessee (for those who may be unaware) is in the "buckle of the Bible-belt" and very conservative to say the least. As an example, in the state legislature we had one of the dumbass senators try and pass the "don't say gay" bill in K-12 school setting. East Tennessee the part where I live is also part of the Appalachian region that has historically made it geographically and culturally somewhat isolating and difficult for LGBT people to come out with a few "gay friendly" places and support. Similarly, in India, in a nutshell, the culture is hegemonically heterosexual and patriarchal, repressive for LGBT people, and homophobia is quite prevelant and accepted norm: again, limited resources available and lack of support for gay people.

Now, having visited Limerick here in Ireland I am so shocked that there are no gay places anymore (closed for various reasons), in a town with such a significant population here in Ireland the lack of a gay place is mind-blowingly appalling--and oh my lord--sends such a strong negative message regarding acceptance of diversity (or lack of) towards LGBT people, I am just speechless. My experiences in East Tennessee and India do not seem so bad anymore!!!

My email address is bm42667@gmail.com: I look forward to hearing from those interested and meeting you face-to-face in a real setting (hopefully): please let me know that my experiences of finding a limited gay community here in Limerick is completely way-off the mark. My warm regards, Bharat

Conor30

out of town wrote: »

I am originally from India and living and working in Tennessee, USA. I am here in Limerick on conference travels till the coming Sunday. Tennessee (for those who may be unaware) is in the "buckle of the Bible-belt" and very conservative to say the least. As an example, in the state legislature we had one of the dumbass senators try and pass the "don't say gay" bill in K-12 school setting. East Tennessee the part where I live is also part of the Appalachian region that has historically made it geographically and culturally somewhat isolating and difficult for LGBT people to come out with a few "gay friendly" places and support. Similarly, in India, in a nutshell, the culture is hegemonically heterosexual and patriarchal, repressive for LGBT people, and homophobia is quite prevelant and accepted norm: again, limited resources available and lack of support for gay people.

Now, having visited Limerick here in Ireland I am so shocked that there are no gay places anymore (closed for various reasons), in a town with such a significant population here in Ireland the lack of a gay place is mind-blowingly appalling--and oh my lord--sends such a strong negative message regarding acceptance of diversity (or lack of) towards LGBT people, I am just speechless. My experiences in East Tennessee and India do not seem so bad anymore!!!

My email address is bm42667@gmail.com: I look forward to hearing from those interested and meeting you face-to-face in a real setting (hopefully): please let me know that my experiences of finding a limited gay community here in Limerick is completely way-off the mark. My warm regards, Bharat

You're right in everything you say. However, Limerick is actually quite small. It also doesn't have a great name for itself as a city, whether fairly or unfairly.

In any case, Ireland is still just embracing LGBT people - homosexuality was only decriminalized as late as 1993!!!!! It's no San Francisco!! The scene, even in Dublin, is small, standoffish and fairly closeted.
Go to Belfast, it's slightly friendlier there.

JupiterKid

Conor30 wrote: »

London, Amsterdam, Berlin, Barcelona, Madrid, Munich, Copenhagen, Manchester, Birmingham, Liverpool, Paris, Prague, Zurich, Vienna etc. all have scenes much bigger & better than Dublin's and that's just Europe! Dublin's cliquey & closeted scene simply doesn't compare.

Dublin's gay scene isn't that bad.

Yes it's quite small and could be a bit bigger and have more variety - Dublin IMO needs a permanant lesbian venue and one or two more smaller bars but if everyone had such a negative attitude to Dublin's scene as you then there wouldn't be much of a scene left to bitch about.

Conor30

JupiterKid wrote: »

Dublin's gay scene isn't that bad.

Yes it's quite small and could be a bit bigger and have more variety - Dublin IMO needs a permanant lesbian venue and one or two more smaller bars but if everyone had such a negative attitude to Dublin's scene as you then there wouldn't be much of a scene left to bitch about.

Yes, it isn't that bad but it isn't that good either. Everyone is entitled to his/her own opinion. That's what a message board is for. I'm not the only one to say something negative about it on this thread, so maybe have a go at someone else on it too.

out of town

Thanks for sharing your insights, Conor30! Makes much good sense and helps me understand the environment a lot better. Cheers, Bharat

LegacyUser

In comparison with say London, Dublin lacks a safe space for women to hang out. London has gay bars exclusively for men and exclusively for women, it also used to have the wonderful 'first out' which had one of the most pleasant atmospheres of any gay establishment I've been to. One of the biggest clubs in Dublin is a destination for straight women and hen parties, I have witnessed of these groups mocking lesbians, it's an 'only here for the freak show' attitude that I find distasteful.

shoegirl

cantfathomit wrote: »

In comparison with say London, Dublin lacks a safe space for women to hang out. London has gay bars exclusively for men and exclusively for women, it also used to have the wonderful 'first out' which had one of the most pleasant atmospheres of any gay establishment I've been to. One of the biggest clubs in Dublin is a destination for straight women and hen parties, I have witnessed of these groups mocking lesbians, it's an 'only here for the freak show' attitude that I find distasteful.

What is a "safe space" for lesbians?
How do you know that all of the women in groups are straight? I find most of them fine, what riles them up is hostile lesbians glaring at them like they've no right to be there.

Dublin isn't a great scene anymore because it's first priced itself out and then lots of people too far away, in a city with night time transportation. It isn't bad for its size though. What I think it lacks is not the bars but "other activities" outside of drinking.