How to forget him

46w

Ive posted here several times about a crappy relationship I was in. Basically I love(d) a guy and he didnt want what I wanted, a relationship. I have never been in love before, I fell head over heels for him. We were seeing each other for over 2 years. I thought the world of him, unfortunatly he didnt feel as much for me as I did for him. It was driving me crazy. I stopped seeing him almost 3 months ago now. He texted me twice in the weeks after that when he was drunk. I didnt reply. I cant however stop thinking about him. Every day, actually Id say every hour I do think about him and what could/should have been. How long is this going to go on for? Im trying to get on with things but its so difficult. Every where I go and everything I do seems to bring back memories of him. I really did and I suppose probably do love him to bits. I was very naive to loet myself fall so badly for him. It has the last year or more of my life ruined. I think of nothing else. Is this normal? Im trying my best to keep out of places I may bump into him, but its not easy to do this, we live close by each other. Its a mess, my life is ruined by the whole thing

Im moving away soon with work and I cant wait but I hope I dont go mad over it!

brokenice

It's cheesy but I don't care...listen to the words of this song... a lot, and I mean A LOT to be said for them! especially 'you deserve the best in life so if the time isn't right then move on, second best is never enough, you'll do much better baby on your own....and when you're gone he might regret it, think about the love you once had, try to carry on but he just won't get it, he'll be back on his knees!'

I was once where you are now, saw a guy for a few months (you were 2 years so i can only imagine how tougher it is for you) ended up to be a complete knob, at first i was upset, but then i realised he wasn't worth it because he's just an asshole, simple as! this song always put me in a good mood in the time after...and as for the drunken messages (of which i had many feigning apology) forget about them! once an ass, always an ass!

NOW GO BLAST THIS UP! HOPE IT HELPS! and remember, you do deserve the best! don't settle for anything less!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4yazRx1N0fI

azezil

Isn't the general rule of thumb that it'll take half as long as the time you date them or something? So maybe you'll get over him in a year ^_^

peasncarrots

hey yeah in time u will get over him and i know thats easy to say bu i was in similiar position to you and yeah i got the drunken calls n texts and i felt crap for a while but movin away will help you GOOD LUCK

oisindoyle

My sympathies to you,it's ***ty we've all been there and f**k does it hurt .
You were not naive ,you fell for someone ,your emotions got involved (naturally ) and you got hurt .
The reality is he didnt want what you wanted ,you did nothing wrong but you are the one suffering ,it's a bummer for sure ,but in time you WILL realise that it was a flawed "relationship".
It will take time to get over him ,it will hurt but you will move on and meet someone else who wants what you want and respect you.
Good luck

Dwn Wth Vwls

Don't think about "what could have been", because it's just fantasy. It could never have happened because he wasn't interested.

Don't think about "what should have been", because it's not true. What should happen, does happen, that's the way life is.

Don't try and stop yourself enjoying the memories or the good times. They're real and you'll always have them to look back on fondly. Just accept that it's over and now it's time to move on.

If you see him it doesn't matter, because he doesn't feel the same and so it can never work. The most desirable/necessary quality in a person is if they're interested in you. He's not interested, so he's not right for you. Think of it as a fundamental flaw in his character. He's broken, so to speak, and you can't fix him.

Appreciate what you had, accept that it's over, and look forward to the day you meet someone who feels the same way about you.

i_steal_sheep

Dwn Wth Vwls wrote: »

Don't think about "what could have been", because it's just fantasy. It could never have happened because he wasn't interested.

Don't think about "what should have been", because it's not true. What should happen, does happen, that's the way life is.

Don't try and stop yourself enjoying the memories or the good times. They're real and you'll always have them to look back on fondly. Just accept that it's over and now it's time to move on.

If you see him it doesn't matter, because he doesn't feel the same and so it can never work. The most desirable/necessary quality in a person is if they're interested in you. He's not interested, so he's not right for you. Think of it as a fundamental flaw in his character. He's broken, so to speak, and you can't fix him.

Appreciate what you had, accept that it's over, and look forward to the day you meet someone who feels the same way about you.

Wise words, right there!

1ZRed

46w wrote: »

I was very naive to loet myself fall so badly for him. It has the last year or more of my life ruined.

Its NOT your fault! Don't loath yourself because you couldn't help it. there was a reason you fell in love with him so don't look back at this as a waste of a year and a relationship because you gained experience, and as one poster said you got good memories out of it. How can you expect to move on if you keep stressing about the bad things. You need to face the whole situation head on and say "yeah I got my heart torn to absolute sh!t but I had a great time getting there".
He text you but you didn't reply and now you are continuously doing your head in by what ifs. Would it be so bad to find out what he wants even if its just him wondering if your ok? It could give you a lot of closure.

Don't tear my head off, but I kind of get where your ex might be coming from. I'm fcukin crap with feelings/emotions and saying that I love someone.
Just because I'm not able to say it (mostly because I do not want to be vulnerable to someone) doesn't mean I don't love the person. Again, thats just me ( and my massive issue/flaw) and may not apply to your ex.

Honestly I hope you sort your situation out buddy and face your problems head on because replaying them does nothing for you but do your head in:)
Things will be great again however you choose to treat the situation just give it time!:D