What's he playing at?

LegacyUser

Basically I met a guy in a club last night we got chatting and I ended up kissing him nothing more. We were getting on really well. When it was over we both were going in separate directions. he told me his full name and said add me on facebook tomorrow. then he said take out your phone ill give you my number which I did and then he gave me his. (we are both 21 by the way)

Fast forward to today I added him on facebook he hasn't accepted me but I know he has been online because he posted something on his wall and I also sent him a text which he has ignored up to now...what is going on?????? is he just not interested? I thought when he asked for my number he was. I don't understand men!

_dublinlad_

confusedgirl90 wrote: »

Basically I met a guy in a club last night we got chatting and I ended up kissing him nothing more. We were getting on really well. When it was over we both were going in separate directions. he told me his full name and said add me on facebook tomorrow. then he said take out your phone ill give you my number which I did and then he gave me his. (we are both 21 by the way)

Fast forward to today I added him on facebook he hasn't accepted me but I know he has been online because he posted something on his wall and I also sent him a text which he has ignored up to now...what is going on?????? is he just not interested? I thought when he asked for my number he was. I don't understand men!

This may sound absolutely horrible so look away now if you dont want to see the probable cold hearted truth....

He probably saw your profile photo (or photo albums if you have your fb on public) and thought he didnt fancy you and maybe had beer gogles on when you met.

As horrible as it sounds that is the most likely answer. I hate to say I have done it a couple of times myself. Then again he may just be playing a little hard to get and trying to not look over interested, but id be 95% sure its the beer gogles thing. This dosent mean your ugly, it just means your not his type.

Sorry hunny.

LegacyUser

well that is harsh but it was something I wouldn't have thought of and it makes alot of sense. Thanks for being honest, at least now I know where I stand which is something!

snafuk35

Have a bit of patience? He met you last night. Just wait a bit. He'll probably add you by this evening and text you later?

Susie_Q

He might be trying to play it cool, like that silly old rule where guys wait 3 days before contacting a girl after meeting her. Give it a couple of days - if you don't hear from him then you know he's not interested.

danslevent

Sometimes guys just ask for numbers at the end of the night because it kind of seems impolite not to. I don't know how many times I have exchanged numbers and nothing has come out of it, just asked for it at the time because I was pretty drunk and felt like the right thing to do!

And the whole looking at pictures thing might not be right unless your account is public? Otherwise they would only see your profile picture, which would be silly to make a judgement on that alone. I say the guy probably just doesn't want any sort of sober relationship. I know I have had great nights out with people but when it comes down to it, I'd rather not engage soberly with them! Sounds a bit mean but sure that's reality really.

Good luck OP, forget about him if he doesn't get back in touch and thank your lucky stars he didn't accept your friend request, then you'd have to see his status and all that shi.te the whole time!

winston82

_dublinlad_ wrote: »

This may sound absolutely horrible so look away now if you dont want to see the probable cold hearted truth....

He probably saw your profile photo (or photo albums if you have your fb on public) and thought he didnt fancy you and maybe had beer gogles on when you met.

As horrible as it sounds that is the most likely answer. I hate to say I have done it a couple of times myself. Then again he may just be playing a little hard to get and trying to not look over interested, but id be 95% sure its the beer gogles thing. This dosent mean your ugly, it just means your not his type.

Sorry hunny.

That's terrible advide. You're just speculating and have zero clue as to what's happening. The decent thing to say would have been "give it a little time and if no reponse then he's probably not interested".

What you've done is pick worst case scenario and posted it up and purposely made the op feel worse. Have some decency at least.

_dublinlad_

winston82 wrote: »

That's terrible advide. You're just speculating and have zero clue as to what's happening. The decent thing to say would have been "give it a little time and if no reponse then he's probably not interested".

What you've done is pick worst case scenario and posted it up and purposely made the op feel worse. Have some decency at least.

Either do you have any clue whats going on. Im just guessing like her. If I post a tread on this I like to hear peoples honest opinions, I dont want them to sugar coat things or make me feel better for the sake of it.

I know from my own experience that this happens all the time. Its horrible, shallow and not something Im proud to say ive done before. But it happens every morning after the night before all around the world. Just want her to be aware of it.

Herrick

OP sometimes people can have fun on a night out, but not want anything more after. They sometimes swap details when parting just to avoid any awkwardness. For the record, men aren't the only ones guilty of doing this by the way

There could be a few reasons he isn't making contact. He could be just out of a relationship, he could have a hectic college/work load and no time for dating, etc. There is also the possibility that he may have a gf too, hence why he won't accept the FB request.

It happens to us all. You'll find another fella who will make the effort

Whatever you do don't dwell on him or why he isn't contacting you, it will drive you crazy.

LegacyUser

OP here.

For the record he was relatively sober that night-had only had two pints so wouldn't really agree with people saying that he didn't contact me as he changed his mind when he was sober.

Heard nothing by today so I have decided to delete the request and forget about him.

Thanks to everyone that posted I appreciate all the advice and opinions.