Girlfriend has ended relationship

LegacyUser

As the title says.
Have been with my girlfriend for 4+ years and living together for bout 15 months.

She ended things a few days ago and I'm at a loss.

She says her heart isn't in it anymore and addmittedly we haven't been getting on well the last while but I feel its more down to herself than me.

She is 28 and currently working in a job she hates. It gets her down alot and she is constantly in a bad mood when she gets home. She also doesn't feel good about herself in general, ie always saying she is unhappy with her body, that she has put on weight, doesn't like the look of herself etc. She also went through a alot a few years back just as we got together which has left a permanent dark cloud over her(sounds cryptic I know but don't want to give details)

All of this has made her become grumpy, irritable and very hard to deal with and get on with. And I feel this is the root of our problems. We have suffered as a result.

I have tried for us to get on but it's like a brick wall. And there is only so much I can do when someone is so unhappy with themselves and unresponsive. The unhappiness spread into our relationship and wreacked havoc.

I really wanted us to work, even though it was tough living with her at times ,I still loved and cared for her(still do now).

she has always being a person to run away from her problems, not deal with things. I feel she is not dealing with her own issues and instead has compromised our relationship.

She would like to go back to college and get a job she enjoys and I fully support her on that.

I hope I haven't painted her as a horrible person as she is not. Under all her recent grumpiness is a caring, compassionate and loving person. I'm not perfect myself, far from it, but I believe in working on something and trying to sort out issues instead of taking the easy route and bailing. I hate to see people give up on relationships so easily.

I thought we would have a long and happy future together. Thinking back to our happier days when we used say nothing will ever come between us, all this now seems so bizzare and kinda frightening.

I'm not sure what I'm looking to get out of this post, maybe just get down how I'm thinking.

Anyways thanks for reading.

Lorna123

I would say just leave her alone for a while and let her think things out. Don't contact her in any shape or form. She sounds fed up with herself more so than with you. In the end what will be will be and in the meantime get out and have some fun.

leightheone

she shud have spoken to you about her prob,
insted od shuting you out,
she sounds a bit crazy,,,,