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i have hit a brick wall and dont know what to do....

  • 24-01-2012 2:56am
    #1
    loli1806
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10 ✭


    I don't even know where to start tbh.... I've been seeing this guy for six years, and we have had our rough patches and got through them. But right now we are in a slump... I have been seeing a therapist for 6 months to overcome a rough childhood, so I know I come with a lot of baggage. I'm the type that can and will express how I feel and I've always been straight up and honest with him about doubts fears etc. He is the complete opposite to me where he cannot express himself, and before I never pushed for him to open up. But I am heading to a very honest and raw me so when I'm having a heartfelt chat with him his silence and lack of communication irritates me. I'm pouring my heart out to him. These problems have been there for long time, we both ignored it and swept it under the mat, but i don't want to do that anymore. He proposed to me last year and my first instinct was to say yes, then my head kicked in, to me marriage is a serious life changing decision one that I don't take lightly, so i couldn't accept his proposal, what i said to him was if I was going to marry him I wanted to do it whole heartedly and not half heartedly. Now I'm no angel, but i have owned up to my actions in the relationship whereas he hadn't, he turns it back on me. And what goes thru my mind is he knows my baggage and sometimes I feel like he plays on it. I'm very conflicted when it comes to him, I can't seem to figure out if i want to stay with him or end it. I can't keep going on like this, and for a desperate way to help with us I mentioned to him months ago for him to go to councilling, he was reluctant at first because he thinks he has no issues which I know he has. But he came around and said he wants to do it, but I'd to make the appointment. Is he serious bout this? What do I do, sorry for the rant, I'm just seriously confused.


Comments

  • #2
    Payton
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,692 ✭✭✭Payton


    One thing I noticed, you didn't say that you love eachother in the post.
    Your going through counselling which seems to be making you more aware of your surroundings in your relationship. Where he doesn't really want to "open up" nor can you make him, but you deserve to be happy with someone especially you've been with so long with, maybe the relationship has run its course. Can you see a future together?


  • #3
    loli1806
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10 ✭loli1806


    I do think bout a future with him, and i would love to give it a real shot, hence why I'm doing councilling and getting him to do it too, its my last resort. I just need things to change for the better, and if it does end I want to walk away knowing I did all I could to make it work.


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