Odd/Stupid things you have done to impress the opposite sex?

John Doe1

When I was 12 I decided i that skateboarding was what would make girls touch my willy.

On my 3rd day or so of owning a skateboard, i noticed two girls i knew at the bottom of the road. I decided to impress them by going down the hill while keeping the back end of the skateboard up, i fell over and ended up with a bloody nose.:o

stupidusername

If there's one lesson to be learnt it's that girls are not impressed by skateboards. at any age. ever.

im invisible

once, i accidentally the whole thing...

Blitzkrieger

stupidusername wrote: »

If there's one lesson to be learnt it's that girls are not impressed by skateboards. at any age. ever.

Lies! Skakeboards and V8s are the only way to get wimmens....


I once tried to out-Yoga another guy to impress a particularly hot teacher. It gets more pathetic when I say he was sort of a priest, but that's a long story...

Samich

There was a girl I liked when I was young, she was friends with my sister aswell as me, she was inside in the sitting room. I got my football and went outside the window and started doing bicycle kicks. :P......then I went over asking did she see what I did :P

Chuck Stone

Story time:

Brought a girl to Fota Wildlife Park and while we were walking around it I spotted a large Ostrich egg about 30 meters from where the Ostrich was standing and about 20 meters from the fence - it looked like it had been rejected by the bird. I decided I wanted this interesting egg and it would have the added effect of impressing my date.

So I deftly leap the fence and scarper up the incline to poach the prize. As I was bending over to pick up the egg I heard my fair female cry 'WATCH OUT!'. I looked up to see what the danger was and there was a bloody great Ostrich staring angrily at me as if to say 'touch that egg I smash your skull with my beak'.

So I let out a little scream and turn tail and legged it back towards the fence not knowing if the angry bird was chasing me. When I got to the fence it was much higher from my side seeing as a dry moat was dug around the inside of the fence. I leap onto the fence and manage to get myself tangled in it eventually wriggling out of it and landing on my arse on the other side. My date was laughing her head off at what happened. I was glad that only my pride was injured as opposed to my skull.

Cool story bro?

FatherLen

once drunk at a party i "attempted" a backflip.

long story short, you have seen the fail videos.

Where To

'Borrow' clothes from their washing line.

Cork boy 55

I invented the question mark.

minidazzler

Tried to play guitar...I can actually play, just not when drunk or when being watched!

Also, telling a girl I liked her, worst decision ever, the game is there to be played for a reason.

oldyouth

Married her

Mr Benevolent

Boasted about betting all my money - only to lose it all at the bookie's and tell her about the loss. She's still with me.

Johnny Foreigner

Years ago I owned a Mercedes E55 AMG.
My girlfriend loved the power of it, and had never driven anything like it before.
She begged me for ages to let her have a go in it. So I did. She donutted it (diffing) until my 275 35 ZR 18 tyres were bald as her pussy.
It was a buzz at the time, but the tyres were £250 each.
Here is a clip of someone doing the same thing in the same car:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=knt4SMnmTXE

af_thefragile

stupidusername wrote: »

If there's one lesson to be learnt it's that girls are not impressed by skateboards. at any age. ever.

Aww... That means Avril Lavinge was lying!!:mad::mad:

44leto

I once bought a girl a drink and I learned my lesson, I never done that again.

Kevin Duffy

A big fúckoff tattoo on my chest with her name in it. I was young enough that I had to lie about my age to get it. She wouldn't let me shorten it to Kathy either, so I went through the full pain of Katherine.

I know it's stupid, but I'm oddly proud of it all these years later. Sure who wouldn't love an eagle and a heart on their diddy??

senorwipesalot

I cut off my left ear after doing some sh1te oil paintings.

GLaDOS

af_thefragile wrote: »

Aww... That means Avril Lavinge was lying!!:mad::mad:

Well actually in the song he doesn't get anything until he becomes a rock star. So the real lesson is guitar = babes.

John Doe1

ScienceNerd wrote: »

Well actually in the song he doesn't get anything until he becomes a rock star. So the real lesson is guitar = babes.

I bought a guitar a few years after the skateboard and had sex a few years after that, coincidence i think not:p

Bubblefett

When I was in college I used to chug pints in one when I was out with the lads. I believe my reasoning was free pint and I get a better buzz...

I also used to tie cherry stalks in knots in my mouth til I nearly choked on one. I is sexy

stupidusername

Skateboard not good,guitar better

Chuck was taken

stupidusername wrote: »

If there's one lesson to be learnt it's that girls are not impressed by skateboards. at any age. ever.

I found that out when I was 17

castletownman

Naked press-ups at a house-party for the craic.

It worked, but not on the girl I wanted

Feeona

castletownman wrote: »

Naked press-ups at a house-party for the craic.

It worked, but not on the girl I wanted

But it worked on the girl under you. Right?

castletownman

Feeona wrote: »

But it worked on the girl under you. Right?

Of course

Eve_Dublin

So many things...probably the one I still cringe at is when I was 14 and I got the Aston Villa jersey (Aston feckin' Villa!) for my birthday and memorised all the players in the team just because the guy I was mad about back then was into them but I was too shy to talk to him (although we'd shifted silently a few times before that but no before and after banter....I didn't know what to say to him ). One of my friends at the time shouted out at him down the street, "EVE_DUBLIN GOT THAT JERSEY COS YOU SUPPORT THEM AAAAAND SHE MEMORISED ALL THE PLAYERS IN THE TEAM SO YOU'D LIKE HER!!". I almost died. No more mute shifts after that. I was permanantly in bunny boiler territory for all eternity after that.

Kevin Duffy

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

So many things...probably the one I still cringe at is when I was 14 and I got the Aston Villa jersey (Aston feckin' Villa!) for my birthday and memorised all the players in the team just because the guy I was mad about back then was into them but I was too shy to talk to him (although we'd shifted silently a few times before that but no before and after banter....I didn't know what to say to him ). One of my friends at the time shouted out at him down the street, "EVE_DUBLIN GOT THAT JERSEY COS YOU SUPPORT THEM AAAAAND SHE MEMORISED ALL THE PLAYERS IN THE TEAM SO YOU'D LIKE HER!!". I almost died. No more mute shifts after that. I was permanantly in bunny boiler territory for all eternity after that.

Oh, you're that Eve?? :eek:



:pac:

Eve_Dublin

Ah come on! This thread has potential...I'm bumping it up!

Tesco Massacre

Well, when I was a kid I'd pull their hair & call them names to get their attention. And sometimes I'd throw pebbles. Hehe, good ol' Elaine Moriarty used to go weak at the knees for my pebble-throwing.

I doubt women'd be into that sort of stuff nowadays, though. They're all into their Cosmopolitan, Delia Smith and Celine Dion.

kincsem

Be myself. :rolleyes:

Nailz

kincsem wrote: »

Be myself. :rolleyes:

The self-loathing-ometer is going through the roof, chin up, man.

Tesco Massacre

I've made a fool of myself so many times trying to impress women that I don't even care any more.

Lando Griffin

I loved Jackie, a girl at school and although had shifted her two best friends ( badly ) all I wanted was Jackie. I used to turn into a total mess when she would talk to me, so you can imagine how the excitement when one day in second year she sat beside me on the bus home from school. A mixture of nearvs, hunger and desire overtook me and out of pure bravado got a mars bar from my bag and two bites later the whole thing was a in my mouth. With wrapper disgarded on the ground I began to struggle with the melting chocolate mess in my mouth and started choking, spitting the mars all over myself and the seat in front. The whole bus paniced, but some of the older kids to come to my assistance. I remember looking at a shocked Jackie as one of the sixth years was slapping my back trying to dislodge the chocolate. It took about a month before they stopped teasing me, and I could approach Jackie tip time at the junior disco. Waste coat on and fueled with a can of Smithwicks I offered Jackie a lift on my shoulders, but unfortunally a mixture of me being wimpy and she mounting too sudden shuddered us across the dance floor and colapsing in a sore heap.

af_thefragile

stupidusername wrote: »

Skateboard not good,guitar better

Neither working for me so far...

Kevin Duffy

af_thefragile wrote: »

Neither working for me so far...

You have to do them at the same time. Have you been doing them seperately all along? Pffttt, amateur.

kumate_champ07

homemade business card, I was 18