Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

OH compliments me at work

  • 31-12-2011 6:34pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I know this is a small problem compared to many but anyway...

    I have a boyfriend of 3 years, love him loads, he's a lovely guy. We work in the same company, but as it's not an office job, we only really see each other on our lunch break and the odd afternoon break, so it's not too overwhelming.

    The thing is, is that he has this thing where he has to compliment me all the time, in front of all our colleagues. When I walk in, he tells me my hair is lovely or points out that I'm wearing new shoes and to be honest, I find it really uncomfortable because everyone then stares at me and some of the girls look me up and down. I'm sure half the time they're thinking 'she doesn't look that great!' I hate attention being drawn to my appearance. I'm very self-conscious as I suffer from acne and rosacea. I've asked him to stop doing it as it makes me and I'm sure others, feel awkward, but he got offended and told me I should be happy and he keeps doing it. I don't understand why he can't save his compliments for when we're alone together. He thinks I'm being nasty and ungrateful. Help!


Comments

  • #2
    WindSock
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,239 ✭✭✭✭WindSock


    Agree about saying it to him again and you are not happy or comfortable with him saying these nice things in the workplace. Maybe tell him you appreciate them but maybe not in front of your collegues as it embarrasses you.

    He might believe he is being nice and giving you confidence but he needs to know that is not how you feel.


  • #3
    tinkerbell
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,423 ✭✭✭tinkerbell


    Agree what the others said. Complimenting someone like that in front of work colleagues all the time is not really very appropriate if it's upsetting you. You need to tell him that it is not making you happy, that while you appreciate the compliments you'd prefer it if he didn't do it in front of work people.


  • #4
    cafecolour
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,328 ✭✭✭cafecolour


    Maybe explain to him that this is essentially PDA (it may not be physical affection, but it's certainly a public display of affection IMHO), and that it's inappropriate in front of work colleagues, the same as if you were holding hands or kissing.

    By constantly complementing you (and no one else), he is emphasizing the nature of your relationship at work.

    And the rest of your co-workers aren't thinking 'she doesnt look that good' they're thinking 'get a room' ;)


Advertisement