Gay family

fluffybiscuits

Well thought would throw this one out there. I have a gay family! Well what do I mean? I have a butch lesbian cousin (who is happy with her partner), a twinky cousin who lives in Asia (happily partnered) plus a cousin who is pre op female to male transgender and there is me the bear! We have the support of all our families, our friends and we do provide support to one and other. (Funnily enough all on my mothers side of the family!) . I know I shouldnt use the labels but just to give an idea of how diverse we are! There is light at the end of that tunnel that is coming out, be positive !

dreamer_ire

Hey fluffy, interesting thread. I also have two gay cousins (both male) and I suspect an aunt who is gay. I have a number of friends who are gay and have gay siblings. One of my gay friends has two siblings and all three of them are all gay!

The numbers often quoted are between 4% and 10% so everyone in the country there must have gay family/extended family members !

fluffybiscuits

dreamer_ire wrote: »

Hey fluffy, interesting thread. I also have two gay cousins (both male) and I suspect an aunt who is gay. I have a number of friends who are gay and have gay siblings. One of my gay friends has two siblings and all three of them are all gay!

The numbers often quoted are between 4% and 10% so everyone in the country there must have gay family/extended family members !

It wouldnt surprise me if more members of our families are gay! Three gay brothers! What are the chances of that but I bet all three are happy

Caiseoipe19

My bother is gay. Makes it a hell of a lot harder to come out to family I find.

fluffybiscuits

Are your parents not accepting of him?

Caiseoipe19

Ah no they are, (and of me!) but it's just bound to be harder to get your head around having one gay person in the family, never mind two. I could probably count the number of openly gay people around my age that I know of on one hand. Ah how I love rural Ireland!

mrDerek

my mate is gay and his sister is gay as well. needless to say itl be tricky giving their parents grandkids haha

Beruthiel

Two gay uncles from a family of 10.
Neither of them ever came out, but it is quite clear to someone who knows the signs.

ongarboy

Cygnus wrote: »

Ah no they are, (and of me!) but it's just bound to be harder to get your head around having one gay person in the family, never mind two. I could probably count the number of openly gay people around my age that I know of on one hand. Ah how I love rural Ireland!

I understand this. While I'm the only gay in my immediate family, I sense my parents would have a harder struggle if one of my siblings also came out as well (or I'd feel it was an additional burden for me to come out also if one of my siblings had done so before me). I'm blessed my parents and family completely accept me being gay (only my dad took a bit of time getting used to as he is of an older generation but he totally embraces me and my partner into the family).

fluffybiscuits

Cygnus wrote: »

Ah no they are, (and of me!) but it's just bound to be harder to get your head around having one gay person in the family, never mind two. I could probably count the number of openly gay people around my age that I know of on one hand. Ah how I love rural Ireland!

Hehe! Glad to hear things are good for you! I can imagine the same for my parents and they are very accepting of it!

Kranium

I wish I had a gay family , maybe just a family that understood that it cannot be helped .

Being gay is the worst most burdened sin of all to the rents

TwoMums2Be

mrDerek wrote: »

my mate is gay and his sister is gay as well. needless to say itl be tricky giving their parents grandkids haha

Really not that difficult at all

TwoMums2Be

mrDerek wrote: »

my mate is gay and his sister is gay as well. needless to say itl be tricky giving their parents grandkids haha

Really not that difficult at all

Aard

Not impossible, but hardly "not that difficult at all".

Nyan Cat

I only found out by accident that a male cousin I was close to as a child, is gay.
I wouldn't be surprised if one or two others are too (also lads)
Then there's me. The girly girl.

It's not as rare as you'd be led to believe so it seems!

An Cuinneach

I think I trump the lot of you: three gay brothers and a gay sis. Two of my uncles are gay, one is in a civil partnership. There's something in the water!

The comment above about 'giving your parents grandkids' always sticks out for me, considering my family. Nobody should feel pressured because they think their parents have some right to grandchildren. Sure it would be nice if kids did come along but you can still have a great family relationship without it.

You're the most important thing to your parents, just like your own children would be to you. Anyone else you bring into the family - be they partners, sons or daughters - are a bonus.

Caiseoipe19

Bloody hell! :eek: No topping that anyways!!:D

*Both Wingléacht and focal.ie have let me down on the meaning of your username though...if you'd care to translate, I'm a biteen curious...:rolleyes:*

ongarboy

An Cuinneach wrote: »

I think I trump the lot of you: three gay brothers and a gay sis. Two of my uncles are gay, one is in a civil partnership. There's something in the water!

The comment above about 'giving your parents grandkids' always sticks out for me, considering my family. Nobody should feel pressured because they think their parents have some right to grandchildren. Sure it would be nice if kids did come along but you can still have a great family relationship without it.

You're the most important thing to your parents, just like your own children would be to you. Anyone else you bring into the family - be they partners, sons or daughters - are a bonus.

Wow that is exceptional! Are the majority of your siblings gay then? Did your parents find each subsequent child coming out any bit harder than the one before (ie were there "what, another one?" type reactions)? Are they comfortable telling folks they have 4-5 gay children (unclear whether you are gay also)? Sorry with all the questions, I just find this rather fascinating!

I wonder what it's like having a sibling that's gay and whether it actually makes it easier or harder for someone who's gay during the formative/teen years if they knew they had a bro/sis who had gone the route before them.

TwoMums2Be

Aard wrote: »

Not impossible, but hardly "not that difficult at all".

Well from a female perspective with no fertility issues it really is pretty straight forward! Been there done that
I'm not saying its easy for everyone but I know lots of straight couples struggling to give their parents grandchildren...I just thought it was a flippant comment that just because a set of parents have two gay children makes it unlikely that they will have grandchildren.

TwoMums2Be

An Cuinneach wrote: »

I think I trump the lot of you: three gay brothers and a gay sis. Two of my uncles are gay, one is in a civil partnership. There's something in the water!

The comment above about 'giving your parents grandkids' always sticks out for me, considering my family. Nobody should feel pressured because they think their parents have some right to grandchildren. Sure it would be nice if kids did come along but you can still have a great family relationship without it.

You're the most important thing to your parents, just like your own children would be to you. Anyone else you bring into the family - be they partners, sons or daughters - are a bonus.

As I am not able to thank the post I thought I would reply & say I totally agree. Couples should have children if or when they want to & not because of a parents desire for grandchildren. Both my parents & my partners parents are delighted about their future grandchild but they were also perfectly happy with our family as its been for the last 10 years

It will be hard to beat your family stats

Caiseoipe19

ongarboy wrote: »

I wonder what it's like having a sibling that's gay and whether it actually makes it easier or harder for someone who's gay during the formative/teen years if they knew they had a bro/sis who had gone the route before them.

In my experience, as I said above, no it doesn't...but that's just my own experience.

An Cuinneach

ongarboy wrote: »

Wow that is exceptional! Are the majority of your siblings gay then? Did your parents find each subsequent child coming out any bit harder than the one before (ie were there "what, another one?" type reactions)? Are they comfortable telling folks they have 4-5 gay children (unclear whether you are gay also)? Sorry with all the questions, I just find this rather fascinating!

Hey guys! Yeah, it's more 'queer' to be straight in my family I'm not all that sure on how it was for my parents because I'm the youngest of us and there's a pretty big age gap between my youngest brother and me (I'm 22, he's 30 this year) so when they were coming out, I would have still be a kid.

In saying that though, as I was growing up, their partners would have spent a lot of time up in the house with our family, especially my sister's girlfriends and everyone would have known who they were.

I don't know how often it would come up to be honest, where my parents would have to say "I have five gay kids". My mam calls their partners 'friends' to be people she talks to, but that's more because she doesn't want to say 'boyfriend' when she's talking about a 36 year-old!

And I don't mind the questions, I know we're pretty unusual!

Cygnus wrote: »

Bloody hell! :eek: No topping that anyways!!:D

*Both Wingléacht and focal.ie have let me down on the meaning of your username though...if you'd care to translate, I'm a biteen curious...:rolleyes:*

Ha! It's just an extension of my name, much like how Pearse Station is called Stáisiún na bPiarsach

TwoMums2Be wrote: »

As I am not able to thank the post I thought I would reply & say I totally agree. Couples should have children if or when they want to & not because of a parents desire for grandchildren. Both my parents & my partners parents are delighted about their future grandchild but they were also perfectly happy with our family as its been for the last 10 years

Absolutely agree!

Caiseoipe19

An Cuinneach wrote: »

Ha! It's just an extension of my name, much like how Pearse Station is called Stáisiún na bPiarsach

How did I not realise that...:o

Slang_Tang

I have a large extended family, but no openly gay relatives. Well there's one cousin who's 19, says he's not gay, but posts pictures of himself in club G-A-Y every weekend on his Facebook page. I'm not sure if that counts or not.

Intouch9

Incredibly jealous of everybody here... I'm the complete opposite. Would love to have someone else in the family (or extended family) who isgay, but alas, I'm destined to walk this road alone in my house. Could be worse though... we could ALL be straight!

floggg

Intouch9 wrote: »

Incredibly jealous of everybody here... I'm the complete opposite. Would love to have someone else in the family (or extended family) who isgay, but alas, I'm destined to walk this road alone in my house. Could be worse though... we could ALL be straight!

Don't worry to much about going it alone. I'm the say in my family (as far as I know) but that still hasn't made them any less accepting. Family will amaze you - you can never over estimate the strength of their love and acceptance.