I don't think i can forgive him

LisaLimerickR

Hey guys

I have being seeing this guy for over a month now and i like him alot.

We live in different locations but we manage to meet up once a week.

Anyway last week he was coming to my location to go on a course and arranged to meet up in a hotel.

He then text me to tell me his job had arranged for another guy to go on the course with him and would be staying with him but i could meet him in the morning time.

So roll on the morning time i arrive at the hotel room, only one bed! I used the toilet and saw towels on the ground with makeup on them.

I was gutted, he denied it and said there was no woman there.

Fast forward to 5pm he rang me and confessed to having a female friend there and he was
very sorry.

I am deeply upset, he hadn't the decency to even meet me in my own home town! The more i think about it the more upset and angry i get.

I said that i forgive him and i like him alot.

I know i should dump him becuase he is a liar and cheat.

Each time i think about dumping him i get very upset because i truly like him.

missbelle

Hi Lisa,

I think you know the answer to this one. Even if he had had a female friend in the room, and IF all was perfectly innocent, he should have told you outright, instead of waiting until later that day when he'd had time to think it over and then admit it!!

LisaLimerickR

It wasn't innocent, he had a porn dvd and grapes the lot.

Meanwhile wednesday night i had the gut feeling that he was meeting a woman and i was so upset that i couldn't eat.

The room was under another name so i couldn't go and confront him.

Even on thursday morning he kept up the lie when i asked would your man not wonder why you are not going on the course? He said he told him he didn't feel well.

I'm so angry, the one time he comes to my location and meets up with someone else! I normally spend 3hrs on a bus to see him.

missbelle

Aw you poor thing, it sounds like he has been stringing you along. Unfortunately with you guys living in different towns, he obviously thinks he can have the best of both worlds. He is a bit of an idiot though, arranging originally for you to come to the hotel room, then telling you to come the next morning & with clear evidence that he'd been up to no good with another girl.

Definitely sounds like you need to cut him off, I know it's easier said than done though

dellas1979

Sounds like an ass of the hole variety.

I know you like him, but sometimes it is better to cut your losses. If he lies now (and you have to catch him out) imagine what you will put yourself through in a longer term relationship with him. You may like him, but it doesnt sound like he likes you (or respects you). Believe me I know that sucks and might hurt, but youll get over it. Do yourself a favour and believe that there is someone out there better for you.

nowyouresix

OP: sorry to hear this happened you, but I'd be grateful it happened now , early on, so you have seen the true makeup of this guy. Cut your losses and move on now, and you will be dodging a major bullet !
Best of luck...

holyhead

OP he may tug at your heart strings but try and find a scissors and cut the chord. HE LIED TO YOU! It wont be easy forgetting him but try and move on. Your up a cul de sac with someone like him. Best of luck

hairyprincess

Kick him to the kerb, you are worth way more than what this bloke is offering you. Move on and don't look back

LisaLimerickR

Thanks for your replys guys,

I'm suppossed to be meeting him tomorrow and normally i would feel happy
to be meeting him, not this time however

It's really horrible to feel like this.

I am a friend

LisaLimerickR wrote: »

Thanks for your replys guys,

I'm suppossed to be meeting him tomorrow and normally i would feel happy
to be meeting him, not this time however

It's really horrible to feel like this.

You are mad if you meet him. I would stand him up - not v mature but satisfying.

fungun

Sorry OP but leave him and move on

One question:

he had a porn dvd and grapes the lot.

Grapes??? Am I an innocent or what do ppl use grapes for????? (sorry slightly off topic)

LisaLimerickR

I don't know what he was using the grapes for, probably feeding each other and having a great time! Once i was sick to my stomach at home.

Firetrap

The question of forgiving him doesn't even come into the equation here. Dump him NOW. Yes, you like him but do you really want to invest your time and heart in someone who's not worthy of it? It's not going to get any better, you know.

Big Bag of Chips

Why are you meeting him?

I don't mean that as an aggressive question by the way, I am genuinely asking what the purpose of the meeting is. Is it for you to finish with him officially? Or to talk about what happened/why etc? Or is it for you to tell him that its ok and you'll try get over it?

Be careful if you're thinking of the last scenario, because you are then letting him know what you will put up with.

Miss Fluff

I genuinely don't know why you'd continue to see him armed with the knowledge that he's a cheating arse? That's more or less telling him you're ok with his behaviour and he will do it to you again and again. It all sounds very one-sided, kick him to the curb, it's only been a month, you'll get over him hon

LisaLimerickR

I decided not to meet him.

I feel better in myself and feel like i don't care if i never see him again


Going for sti screening tomorrow too.

nowyouresix

Hope your screening turns out ok...

curlzy

Good woman Lisa! Until I read your last post I was thinking "how pathetic, signing yourself up to a relationship with a thick, lying, cheating scumbag". Glad to see you're not pathetic at all. I know you feel down right now but you'll feel better soon. Onwards and upwards as they say.

OkayWhatever

Go you for standing up and looking out for yourself,I know it must have been hard!

Good luck with the screening, hope everything works out well for you!

You should be proud of yourself for dealing with it the way you did, taking no nonsense! You did the right thing,HIS LOSS NOT YOURS

LisaLimerickR

Went for the screening,

I will get the results next week

I am a friend

LisaLimerickR wrote: »

Went for the screening,

I will get the results next week

Best of luck. You had a lucky escape with that guy...

x Purple Pawprints x

Fair play to you OP, you totally did the right thing by breaking off all contact with the guy and not speaking to him again. Going for the STI screening was a very good idea too seeing as he was seeing other people. Best of luck with it.