Platonic Friendships - Bunch of BS

creeper1

I dont see how a man and a woman can be just friends especially if they are of a similar age.

I mean as in calling each other up and spending time talking on the phone on a regular basis. Or meeting each other and spending time together.

If you have a girl and she is on the phone to a male voice on a regular basis that isn't her family/boss etc then it is unlikely he is "just a friend"

She is either already boneing him or has him as a plan B.

OutlawPete

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i8kpYm-6nuE

Chuck Stone

That Plato guy was full of shit.

minidazzler

That issue only arises if one is attracted to the other, which to be fair, in most cases of platonic friendships is the case, with the guy sticking around just in case and the girl pretending to be oblivious. If i wanna have sex with a girl nowadays I let my intentions be known if they are rebuffed I'm not gonna be friends with her simply because we're not on a level playing field.

Pompey Magnus

I know girls who I am not attracted to physically (not saying they are unattractive, just not my type) but I love spending time with as they have fantastic personalities and I enjoy their company...what would you call that if not Platonic friendship?

AlmightyCushion

Pompey Magnus wrote: »

I know girls who I am not attracted to physically (not saying they are unattractive, just not my type) but I love spending time with as they have fantastic personalities and I enjoy their company...what would you call that if not Platonic friendship?

Being gay.

Diddler82

It is very possible.

I have a very good female friend whom I have been friends with for 5 years now. She is in a commited long term relationship of 10 years.

Although I would consider her to be attractive she does nothing for me sexually and our friendship has never been the flirtatious / "get a room" type friendship. Her boyfriend is now a good friend of mine as a result and more so now they have moved to Australia. I have shared a bed with her and nothing has ever happened as it is not something either of us have even though about. She is a best friend in the male sense of the word, she does nothing sexually for me. I am 100% confident this is the same for her as she is very level headed and I have seen her walk away from potentially dangerous friendships in the past.

So although this is not the norm, it can happen and up until I mate this girl I didnt think it was possible.

I think maturity and awareness are the main factors involved. Having worked closely with a lot of girls when I was both single and with someone, you need to know when to distance yourself from a potentially risky situation as friendships and relationships can be damaged very easily.

Pompey Magnus

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

Being gay.

I am far too unfashionable to be gay

OneArt

Just because one is on the horn constantly doesn't mean everyone else is.

Maybe they're BS for you.

later12

I would consider myself a decent enough barometer for the averagely good-looking, middle class, middle-intellect, garden variety heterosexual male.

And i decree a purely platonic friendship between the aforesaid male and his female counterpart to be extremely impossible.

For various sociological, biological and, well, logical... reasons.... it just cannot happen!

Saila

Diddler82 wrote: »

It is very possible.

I have a very good female friend whom I have been friends with for 5 years now. She is in a commited long term relationship of 10 years.

Although I would consider her to be attractive she does nothing for me sexually and our friendship has never been the flirtatious / "get a room" type friendship. Her boyfriend is now a good friend of mine as a result and more so now they have moved to Australia. I have shared a bed with her and nothing has ever happened as it is not something either of us have even though about. She is a best friend in the male sense of the word, she does nothing sexually for me. I am 100% confident this is the same for her as she is very level headed and I have seen her walk away from potentially dangerous friendships in the past.

So although this is not the norm, it can happen and up until I mate this girl I didnt think it was possible.

you have feelings for her, freudian slip :P

I got into an odd situation where i slept in the same bed as a Swedish girl for four months up until yesterday when she left hanoi.. Hot girl and was best friend here but neither of us wanted to fuk each other so it was fine. That's the first time in my life that playonic friends worked well and it was cause we had other people on the go most of the time. She's mad for Vietnamese guys, i only want Vietnamese girls.

later12

she Fat?

Not at all, hot hot hot.. Everyone wanted her. But neither of us wanted caucasian.

AlmightyCushion

Deleted User wrote: »

Not at all, hot hot hot.. Everyone wanted her. But neither of us wanted cauc

Ah, she was a lesbian.

Cochore

Deleted User wrote: »

I got into an odd situation where i slept in the same bed as a Swedish girl for four months up until yesterday when she left hanoi.. Hot girl and was best friend here but neither of us wanted to fuk each other so it was fine. That's the first time in my life that playonic friends worked well and it was cause we had other people on the go most of the time. She's mad for Vietnamese guys, i only want Vietnamese girls.

WTF? Now that's gay. No reason ever for adults to share the same bed unless they're in a sexual relationship. I can't think of any situation more emasculating for a man.

im invisible

Deleted User wrote: »

Not at all, hot hot hot.. Everyone wanted her.

whats the difference between the girls you were getting with and her?

The girls you were with wanted Caucasian, whereas she...

Kanoe

I always end up sleeping with female friends so I hang out mostly with my manly ones. one manly one and really he's about as manly as a lemon.

Cochore

Cochore wrote: »

WTF? Now that's gay. No reason ever for adults to share the same bed unless they're in a sexual relationship. I can't think of any situation more emasculating for a man.

Don't care, cheaper rent and we got on well.. If we're with other people all the time, who cares.

im invisible wrote: »

whats the difference between the girls you were getting with and her?

The girls you were with wanted Caucasian, whereas she...

What are you trying to get at? Trying to burn people on line for no reason by using racist stereotypes makes you look like a dickhead.

davemc180

i agree op...

if a bloke trys to become best mates with your bird say... he needs to be sent on his way

minidazzler

Deleted User wrote: »

I got into an odd situation where i slept in the same bed as a Swedish girl for four months up until yesterday when she left hanoi.. Hot girl and was best friend here but neither of us wanted to fuk each other so it was fine. That's the first time in my life that playonic friends worked well and it was cause we had other people on the go most of the time. She's mad for Vietnamese guys, i only want Vietnamese girls.

I used to have so much respect for you, really did enjoy alot of your posts. But this kills me. Not even once as a "ah we're bored"?

Cochore

Deleted User wrote: »

Don't care, cheaper rent and we got on well.. If we're with other people all the time, who cares.

The cheaper rent I understand, but sharing the same bed? That's taking it way too far.

davemc180

minidazzler wrote: »

Not even once as a "ah we're bored"?

or after a few beers??? what about the morning horn......

minidazzler

minidazzler wrote: »

I used to have so much respect for you, really did enjoy alot of your posts. But this kills me. Not even once as a "ah we're bored"?

One of us would have been cheating on someone at all times if something happened.

davemc180

Deleted User wrote: »

One of us would have been cheating on someone at all times if something happened.

but did they not see it as cheating sharing a bed with another bird???

later12

Is this racist? But, when was the last time one of you googled 'Vietnamese porn'?

I, personally, have never googled that. I think it should be acceptable to say so.

Cochore

Cochore wrote: »

The cheaper rent I understand, but sharing the same bed? That's taking it way too far.

Why? My girlfriend was a hot viet model who i could link any number of articles to.. But she was stupid rich but moved to London. If you're fuking that in hotels everyday, then it doesn't really matter who ya sleep with at night.

davemc180

Deleted User wrote: »

Why? My girlfriend was a hot viet model who i could link any number of articles to.. But she was stupid rich but moved to London. If you're fuking that in hotels everyday, then it doesn't really matter who ya sleep with at night.

still im sure she didnt sleep in her clothes beside you, fair enough maybe nothing would happen sharing for 1 night but 4 months... your some man

im invisible

Deleted User wrote: »

What are you trying to get at?

it was only a joke, a bit of banter, you said as much yourself in your posts..


Anyway, my opinion would be that the longer you're in a close platonic relationship with someone of the opposite sex, the more chance of one person devoloping feelings/ wanting more out of the relationship, and then things can get a bit messy

K4t

Deleted User wrote: »

Why? My girlfriend was a hot viet model who i could link any number of articles to.. But she was stupid rich but moved to London. If you're fuking that in hotels everyday, then it doesn't really matter who ya sleep with at night.

I think I speak for the whole of AH on this occasion..Pics or GTFO!

Diddler82

Saila wrote: »

you have feelings for her, freudian slip :P

Dammit!!

Maybe it was subconcious :P

im invisible

im invisible wrote: »

it was only a joke, a bit of banter, you said as much yourself in your posts..


Anyway, my opinion would be that the longer you're in a close platonic relationship with someone of the opposite sex, the more chance of one person devoloping feelings/ wanting more out of the relationship, and then things can get a bit messy

Not a funny joke to make to people who live in that country.. Her new bf in London is Vietnamese so the joke just doesn't work and sounds stupid.

Anyway, why do i even have to go on the defensive here? I said i had a plutonic friend and get attacked from all sides.

Azureus

Deleted User wrote: »

Why? My girlfriend was a hot viet model who i could link any number of articles to.. But she was stupid rich but moved to London. If you're fuking that in hotels everyday, then it doesn't really matter who ya sleep with at night.

That's a whole different thread right there! Cant say Id be too happy with my bf sleeping in the same bed as another woman for four months, even if I was a hot viet model

Definately think there are such things as platonic friendships though. Although I have gotten myself into awkward situations with male friends before by doing the oblivious to them liking me thing and it doesnt work, at all.
Once everythings upfront and honest there doesnt have to be any problems. One of my best friends is a guy-see the guy as my brother and him a sister where nothing would EVER happen, and a couple of others who just see me as one of the lads

thebostoncrab

Of course you can have platonic friends, I didn't realise people still thought otherwise!

Some of my closest friends are women who I have no desire to sleep with at all. Yes, they are attractive looking and I know alot of guys would kill to have them, but for me it would be like having sex with your sister and for them a brother.

And before people say that becoming friends with a girl first can turn into something sexual, I don't think it just develops, you know right off the bat if you would. My fiancée for example was a very close friend for 3 years before we got together, but I was attracted to her straight away. I know some will try use that as an example of platonic friendships being bull****, but once again I say that I was attracted to her at the very start, while other women I'm friends with I had no attraction to.

Frank Black

In my view, trying to be friends with people from Pluto would be very difficult if not impossible, for a start there's the sheer distance to overcome. Pluto is around 5billion km away, so it's difficult to pop around for the weekend.
Then, obvioulsy there's the significant cultural differences to overcome.

I honestly don't see how it would work out.

Joe10000

I just don't see the point in talking to women unless you are attracted to them, surely that is how we all are made.

The reverse must also be true.

Platonic relations for me are a lie, one of you always wants more. If its not you then it must be them.

davemc180

Joe10000 wrote: »

I just don't see the point in talking to women unless you are attracted to them, surely that is how we all are made.

The reverse must also be true.

Platonic relations for me are a lie, one of you always wants more. If its not you then it must be them.

exactly... if you meet a stunning looking girl for the 1st time you dont think im gonna be great mates with her... and who ever says otherwise is full of ****..

no matter what you say , your only mates , no attraction , its bull:rolleyes:

for example ya have this stunning looking girl as your friend, yas are chilling doin what ever, she bends over to pick something up, who ever says there not gonna be fixated on her hoop is a blaten liar or is gay simple as....

stupidusername

Ye must all be meeting a load of the wrong kinda people. All but one of my friends is male,my best friend is my ex,i've had sex with one of them and moved on,some of the others I know like me like that,but I know they're friends with me because they want to be friends. I wouldn't be friends with someone who only wanted to know me for sex.they'd make it pretty obvious they weren't really a friend after a short time. So yeah of course it's possible. Slept with a friend at the weekend actually with no fallout

davemc180

stupidusername wrote: »

Ye must all be meeting a load of the wrong kinda people. All but one of my friends is male,my best friend is my ex,i've had sex with one of them and moved on,some of the others I know like me like that,but I know they're friends with me because they want to be friends. I wouldn't be friends with someone who only wanted to know me for sex.they'd make it pretty obvious they weren't really a friend after a short time. So yeah of course it's possible. Slept with a friend at the weekend actually with no fallout

but you just proved the point exactly....

your best friend is your ex ( sexual partner ) you slept with 1 of your FRIENDS, you have a few other who like you in that way ( want to bang you ) and you slept with 1 the weekend...

sorry but you tried to make the point ya can have oppisite sex friends with no attraction yet you clearly pointed out it never works out..!!

1 or the other will eventually grow feeling for there friend..

Plazaman

Deleted User wrote: »

Anyway, why do i even have to go on the defensive here? I said i had a plutonic friend and get attacked from all sides.

Mickey Mouse will go ape shít if he hears you're trying to interfere with his dog.

sensibleken

So what your trying to tell us is that youre lonely and girls dont like you

stupidusername

davemc180 wrote: »

but you just proved the point exactly....

your best friend is your ex ( sexual partner ) you slept with 1 of your FRIENDS, you have a few other who like you in that way ( want to bang you ) and you slept with 1 the weekend...

sorry but you tried to make the point ya can have oppisite sex friends with no attraction yet you clearly pointed out it never works out..!!

1 or the other will eventually grow feeling for there friend..

Where did I say it never works out?? You should read it properly.

The relationship didn't work out,now we're friends,despite the attraction,i had a FB that i'm now just close friends with,a few of them fancy me,and yet are still just really good friends. So my point being it can work out and does. The guys who've fancied me and only wanted to ****,i haven't stayed friends with because they weren't friends.

Chuck Stone

stupidusername wrote: »

The guys who've fancied me and only wanted to ****,i haven't stayed friends with because they weren't friends.

4 letters huh?..

um....

Sing?

Toby Take a Bow

davemc180 wrote: »

exactly... if you meet a stunning looking girl for the 1st time you dont think im gonna be great mates with her... and who ever says otherwise is full of ****..

no matter what you say , your only mates , no attraction , its bull:rolleyes:

for example ya have this stunning looking girl as your friend, yas are chilling doin what ever, she bends over to pick something up, who ever says there not gonna be fixated on her hoop is a blaten liar or is gay simple as....

Meh. I've been friends with girls for many, many years: no attraction, and fairly good friendships. It happens.

davemc180

stupidusername wrote: »

Where did I say it never works out?? You should read it properly.

The relationship didn't work out,now we're friends,despite the attraction,i had a FB that i'm now just close friends with,a few of them fancy me,and yet are still just really good friends. So my point being it can work out and does. The guys who've fancied me and only wanted to ****,i haven't stayed friends with because they weren't friends.

but as in platonic were not talking about been best friends with your ex..

he was a sexual partner, the point im saying is you have male friends who are good friends but you know they are into you, even though they havent acted on there feelings dose not mean there not going to and thats not a platonic friendship, and sleeping with a friend at the weekend proves what were talking about..

blokes and girls very very rarley are just friends with no attraction or sexual feelings unless there gay...

davemc180

sensibleken wrote: »

So what your trying to tell us is that youre lonely and girls dont like you

this directed for me?

if so im not lonely iv a long term girlfriend, but i know what im talking about iv been in situations before with my mates and once a girl who is any way decent looking comes on the scene all the lads would be into them..

fair enough sparks mighten fly but if the oppertunity arose not 1 of them would say no...

cournioni

stupidusername wrote: »

Ye must all be meeting a load of the wrong kinda people. All but one of my friends is male,my best friend is my ex,i've had sex with one of them and moved on,some of the others I know like me like that,but I know they're friends with me because they want to be friends. I wouldn't be friends with someone who only wanted to know me for sex.they'd make it pretty obvious they weren't really a friend after a short time. So yeah of course it's possible. Slept with a friend at the weekend actually with no fallout

That will be some craic if you get a new boyfriend and you are still friends with the lads you slept with.

Gummy Panda

Yes its possible

/forever alone

Misticles

I go out with my then "platonic" friend...

Dravokivich

piff being friends with someone of the opposite sex is easy.

minidazzler

stupidusername wrote: »

Ye must all be meeting a load of the wrong kinda people. All but one of my friends is male,my best friend is my ex,i've had sex with one of them and moved on,some of the others I know like me like that,but I know they're friends with me because they want to be friends. I wouldn't be friends with someone who only wanted to know me for sex.they'd make it pretty obvious they weren't really a friend after a short time. So yeah of course it's possible. Slept with a friend at the weekend actually with no fallout

That's not a platonic friendship, there is an attraction from the lads. What they are doing is hoping the opportunity arrives for them to have sex with you as far off a possibility it is. They may also be friends with you and really like you as a person over someone to have sex with, but since they see you as someone they want to have sex with that immediately stops it being a platonic friendship.