Worried about Alcohol.

LegacyUser

Or more specifically, my relationship with alcohol. I've had experience with an alcoholic family member for years (now in recovery) and I'm afraid that against all my better judgements, I'm starting to go down the same path. I don't drink every night - but when I do, I don't know when to stop. I seem to be drinking more and more lately, and not even because I want to, but because it's becoming a habit. This all came to a head at the weekend when I got so drunk that I fell and hit my head. I've been terrified since then that I've done some internal damage - realistically I think I just gave myself a bump - or rather I HOPE that's all I did - but it genuinely scared the living daylights out of me. I made a show of myself and the people that I was with, and the embarrassment is overwhelming, I feel like crying constantly since. I don't even know why I'm posting here, I just feel like I need to talk to someone and I'm equally terrified and mortified. I don't know what to do or where to go from here. I'm 29, female.

Darkginger

I'm sorry, I'm not sure what to say about you and the booze - but I'd urge you to go get yourself checked out at the docs - a bang on the head can be a nasty thing, and could account for your sensitivity since. Better safe than sorry

R.D. aka MR.D

Just set yourself a limit of i won't drink until new years and see how it goes.

See how you find not drinking. Also having a wee deadline helps when the inevitable- why aren't you drinking questions come up.

If you find you can't be in the same situations just take yourself out of those situations until the new year. You will gain a new perspective on stuff.

The best thing is you will save money, remember everything the next day, no hangovers, no embarrassment.

Give it a try and see how you find it.

Deep Purple

Dear Dobebobedo.

I can totally emphatise with you as I have been in your situation and perhaps still am. My father is a major and hopeless alcoholic, my mum is on the opposite camp, so i have always wondered which gene pool will dominate. I am 31 now and only started drinking alcohol in my early 20s, but I also started enjoying it right away. I found it difficult to stop and tended to drink til i was very very drunk, saying that I don't drink every day either. But when i's out it became almost a mission to get drunk. It was as if I always missed my limit and and way overdid it every single time. as Mr D suggested here- avoid drink for a while, just don't be in situations where it becomes too easy to get drunk.. I know the social life may suffer a bit but believe me you will feel so much better and clearer. I also became very aware of how many drinks I really consume on a night out and now have tried to keep a strict eye on my state of mind and I try not to go to the bar that often and I drink water in between.. Basically just cut back on the drinks and just simply make a decision to keep your head half sober at least at the end of the night. I think you will be ok and just need a break and a little re-assessment as to what is the best way to be around alcohol and then stick to it.. Best of luck to you girl

LegacyUser

I would suggest drinking something non-alcoholic (pint of blackcurrant, coke, sprite, water etc.) between alcoholic drinks. You shouldn't need to get blind drunk every time you drink, if you did I would be thinking you are trying to escape from some other life problems you have.

I am also very different when I drink, if I drink beer I get blind drunk very quickly, but if I drink vodka or whiskey I could easily be knocking them back all night without getting blind drunk. It's whatever way my body handles it. Lately however I have been sticking to a 5/6 drink limit and as many non-alcoholic drinks during the night. Eating before going drinking is very important to me too.

Drinking takes a toll on your body, don't ever forget that. I have over did my drinking at times (even brought on alcoholic induced pneumonia after over-drinking everyday for a month), but if you can hold yourself to a limit there's no reason why you can't have a healthy attitude to drinking and enjoy your nights out more. Nobody wants to drag a friend through the streets when they've over done it.

If you think you can't hold yourself to a limit then I suggest you try to avoid it completely, nobody is asking you to be a hermit but stick to non-alcoholic drinks. Good Luck.

estar

Hi there this is a little wake up call you can listen and be grateful or not. your body and mind is telling you that alcohol is not for you. Limiting it and controlled drinking will not work long term. if you are experiencing escalating drinking patterns and more and more lack of control then that is a sign you could develop a problem. Do you want to take that risk ? It can happen quite rapidly and suddenly. it is terrifying if it does. it can threaten your whole well being. most people don't lose control of their behaviour and change character through drink. only people with a potential problem. My advice and I was exactly where you are now is stop before it gets worse. Not everyone with a problem drinks every day. but someone with a problem will be able to say I cannot tell when I start drinking what will happen to me. Just my opinion of course.

estar

There is no shame in making a mistake just in not acting on it and ensuring it doesn't happen again. rather than spiral into guilt and shame thank your lucky stars you escaped further damage this time. It's easy to decide to give up now and never look back. It's not so easy after a while. aa are good for general information. A problem with alcohol is not defined it is a slow decline. loads of people just like you got over things just like this by listening to their self preservation instinct. put some distance between you and alcohol and see how you feel then. Just my opinion again.

LegacyUser

Thank you for all your replies - I suppose my main problem is that I wouldn't really go out very often and I get really nervous in social situations, so I've started to use the drink as a crutch - to be honest whenever I do go out I'm usually half plastered already because I've been drinking to gear myself up for it. I will definitely take your advice on board and I'm going to stay away from it until the New Year, and see how it goes - I haven't gone to the doctor about my head, to be honest I was too embarrassed and afraid to go in case I did some damage - it's still sore but I'm not having any dizziness or bad headaches. I will ring him if I do get any symptoms. Estar I think you're bang on really, I have noticed my drinking getting a lot worse lately and I think that this was a very frightening kick to make me look at what I'm doing - I really, really don't want to go down the same path as so many others I've seen.

Thanks again for all your replies, very good of ye to read and reply x

estar

Try if you can and socialise without drink while you are abstaining. You will find your confidence improves over time. true confidence is being able to be yourself and present yourself as is to the world it is a freedom there for you if you just give it a chance. It's way more attractive also IMO! people may try and sabotage you be prepared. they want you to behave like them to reinforce their own beliefs.

fungun

could be writing this myself right up to including the bang on the head lol.

its hard when you think you *might* have a problem as you self analyse a lot more. If you are drinking to avoid certain situations then thats a bad sign, you need to stop drinking. However if its a case that when you get out you just dont stop (thats what I do, and just recently have started to get paranoid that I offended ppl/embarrassed myself) then set yourself a limit and really really stick to it, dont ever go 'ah im fine' cos then you will never keep to it. For me, that limit is 6 drinks. I sometimes have more, but if I do its planned.

Being aware of a potential problem is a good sign, probably means you should be self aware enough to detect the start of a real problem. However if you dont like what happens when you drink, why not minimise it/cut it out?