Mild depression?!

LegacyUser

Ok so I don't walk around in a constant bad mood, and I have a good college, social and work life...
But sometimes i wonder do I have a mild case of depression for a few reasons:

-When I was in my teens, my parents used to always say to me that I was like a dark cloud walking around the house, and that I needed to appreciate what I had, but I felt like I couldn't do that, and ended up internalizing how I felt and acting outwardly like everything was grand.

-Now that has materialised into me being "glass half empty" about things, I'm pretty pessimistic and don't expect good things to happen, and I find it hard to look forward to things. (even though I'm in a good course and have a good future and blah blah)

-I also have difficulty motivating myself to do work, some people can sit down and say "ok, i need to get this done, and by happy about getting stuff done", where as sometimes I feel i don't have the enthusiasm to do that.

-I'm kind of... "agnosti-atheist", and I sometimes/often think about death, as in, the obsoleteness, and that frickin' terrifies me, like thoughts pop up on the bus, walking around, not all the time but when they do it's like...aghh!!!

-Therefore sometimes I kind of feel like I know that I know the reality of life and that everything else is just motions to try to ignore how life really it.

-My mum has had depression but never talks about it to me.

-I often have a feeling in my chest that's just like...a down feeling.

-And some days that feeling is gone, and I feel quite positive and light and i think, oh, this is how I'm supposed to feel!

Ok, so, basically, I'm not some quiet, shy, person, I'm in a great degree, appreciate my friends and family, but sometimes I feel this way, and no one knows, so I'm wondering, do I just need to develop a more positive outlook on life, or could i have mild depression?!

Taltos

OP - this forum does not allow the diagnosis of any conditions.
You will though hopefully receive some advice on how to address your outlook etc.

For a diagnosis please go immediately to your GP and even a 2nd GP if you want a 2nd diagnosis.

Taltos

Ainekav

I feel like that sometimes and I used to feel it a lot more, like most of the time.

If you are thinking about it enough to post in here and its bothering you that much, I would go to your college counsellor. I found mine great, they are purely just someone to talk to, and can go further into advising etc as you need them to.

That being said, people have different personalities - some people are just not as positive as others, and little things stress them out more.

Although if your college course is great and you say you like it, then I would wonder why you are unmotivated. A counsellor can help you address that too. Nobody needs to know if you don't want them to, and you can go as often or as long as you want. It's really no big deal and i think it would help you.

best of luck